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Some people are so rude!
This has nothing to do with weddings, but I just had to vent.
I recently started a new job and the two other ladies I work with are so rude! Yesterday they told me that I was getting fat, then one asked me my weight, and I told them 135, and one of them says 'There is no way your 135, I am 140 and you are bigger then me, see you are bigger around the stomach and your hips.' Then the other one asked me what size shirt I am wearing because I am busting out of it, and I told her a medium and she said 'I have a medium too, and it fits me fine. Then they went on for about 10 minutes talking about my weight.
I don't understand why they would say that to another women, how would that make them feel if they were in my position? They shot my self esteem down big time, because I don't think I am overweight. I am 5' 7'' and 135. I literally wanted to cry right at work, because I didn't think people could be that rude.
I recently started a new job and the two other ladies I work with are so rude! Yesterday they told me that I was getting fat, then one asked me my weight, and I told them 135, and one of them says 'There is no way your 135, I am 140 and you are bigger then me, see you are bigger around the stomach and your hips.' Then the other one asked me what size shirt I am wearing because I am busting out of it, and I told her a medium and she said 'I have a medium too, and it fits me fine. Then they went on for about 10 minutes talking about my weight.
I don't understand why they would say that to another women, how would that make them feel if they were in my position? They shot my self esteem down big time, because I don't think I am overweight. I am 5' 7'' and 135. I literally wanted to cry right at work, because I didn't think people could be that rude.
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Re: Some people are so rude!
Don't let what these women say bother you (easier said than done, I know). I know how it is when you're in an office full of women - you come off sounding rude by not sharing your personal life with them, but as soon as you share anything personal, they turn it around and stab you in the back.
Hang in there and you're welcome to vent anytime.
Yep, sizes vary greatly in general. I have jeans that are size five, size 7, size 8, and size 9. And they all seem to fit me fine. Hmm...
It is awfully rude to start talking this way to anyone, especially someone you aren't even very aquainted with.
If this happens again, I would just ask them why they're so stinkin worried about it in the first place.
Don't let what they say be absorbed, just let it roll off your shoulders. It doesn't matter what your weight or size is, because it's none of their business in the first place.
You are obviously in good health and if you're happy with your body that is all that matters! Vent whenever you need to lady and again I am so sorry to hear about this happening.
[QUOTE]Wow thanks ladies. Reading these posts made me feel A LOT better. But today I was sitting in the breakroom with about five other people I work with and one of them said in spanish to the chef that was sitting with us, 'look at her stomach, its rolling over.' I understood what she said, because I speak spanish, but I asked her just to make sure, and she said in english what she had just said. I was SO embarassed! I want to tell her its not o.k. to talk about someone elses weight, but I am too shy!
Posted by Marley90[/QUOTE]
<div><div>Just on a slightly different note (I still totally agree with you that it's not a work topic and not something you should ever say!) that if they are from Spanish backgrounds they might have a different idea of what is polite and what's not polite. In Spain at least, I can't speak for Latin American countries, it's completely normal to comment on people's weight when you see them. Usually to say that the other person has gotten bigger. </div><div>
</div><div> For example: H and I were walking around his mom's small town in Segovia and we saw some people sitting on a bench. We went to say hi because we knew they knew his mom. When we got to them the first thing said was, "Oh, I guess married life is treating you well. You've already grown the married belly."</div><div>
</div><div>I am still completely on your side that it's a shitty thing to be going on and on about, but maybe they don't know. Or maybe I just like to think the best of everyone. :P</div><div>
</div><div>Oh, and 135 at your height you are definitely at a normal and completely healthy weight. So don't listen to them! I hope they knock it off.</div></div>
If you don't feel comfortable going to H.R. on it, I'd at least fight back and ask them when the last time they ate something was because maybe they need to eat in order to get some blood flowing to their thick rude skulls!
your ideal weight range is 118-159.
your "ideal weight" is 140 (assuming you are medium build, you work out at least once a week, and you allow yourself a treat now and then)...
you are nowhere near "overweight". my BMI is 23.0... that's 2 whole points above yours. and i am not overweight.
they're obviously old biddies who have nothing better to do than to try to make you feel bad about yourself.
the next time you hear her talking in spanish, you really should just join in... it always freaks them out.
really, that's just ridiculous. as if young women don't have enough societal pressure to conform to some standard (that really ISN'T standard!)... we don't need to pressure EACH OTHER.
Laugh at the idiots who find it appropriate and interesting to talk about weight, especially at work. It's classless, tacky, and superficial, and only serves to make them look like jealous old hags.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Some people are so rude! : Just on a slightly different note (I still totally agree with you that it's not a work topic and not something you should ever say!) that if they are from Spanish backgrounds they might have a different idea of what is polite and what's not polite. In Spain at least, I can't speak for Latin American countries, it's completely normal to comment on people's weight when you see them. Usually to say that the other person has gotten bigger. For example: H and I were walking around his mom's small town in Segovia and we saw some people sitting on a bench. We went to say hi because we knew they knew his mom. When we got to them the first thing said was, "Oh, I guess married life is treating you well. You've already grown the married belly." I am still completely on your side that it's a shitty thing to be going on and on about, but maybe they don't know. Or maybe I just like to think the best of everyone. :P Oh, and 135 at your height you are definitely at a normal and completely healthy weight. So don't listen to them! I hope they knock it off.
Posted by LadyMadrid08[/QUOTE]
this is definitely true. my BF is hispanic, and all his tias (aunts) call me "flaquita"... it means little skinny girl. i lost 35 lbs in less than 6 months, so they love to comment on that. it makes me a little uncomfortable, especially when they tell other people what a little "gordita" (chunky girl) i used to be... they are very outspoken about EVERYTHING... it is not uncommen to hear them talk about sex/orgasms, body issues, and each other (little gossipers! haha) around the dinner table. um, culture shock. haha
calindi - my BF calls me his gordita or flaquita or mija or even vieja (old woman) affectionately around his family. i was offended at first, but i got used to it. i guess if he thinks i'm his little fatty, well... so be it!
i don't *think* they mean it harmfully (at least, that's what BF tells me) but sometimes it comes off as rude to us.
on the other hand, one of my girlfriends works with a lady from the UK and her coworker is constantly telling her that her clothes don't look right or she needs to quit biting her nails and go get a mani... and she really doesn't mean it badly. it's just that where she comes from, you tell each other these things.
to each their own i guess...