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Not Engaged Yet
Noobie, Not Yet Engaged
Hi all, I'm new to the boards, this is my first post.
My name is Cherrish, I'm 27 and have been dating a wonderful man named Larry, who is two years old than myself, for 4 years. We have a wedding tentatively scheduled for about 2 1/2 years from now, but no ring yet. I am a phlebotomist and a CNA, he's a restaurant manager. I am also going to school full-time to become an RN. We have a 2 year old daughter, and I have 2 other daughters from a previous marriage.
Why the long engagement? Simple...with our lives being as busy as they are, we want PLENTY of time to save up for the wedding we really want (and the one I never got to have) and plan it. Its definitely going to be a family affair, complete with kids (ours and everyone else's). Also, I want to either graduate or be within months of getting my degree when the wedding rolls around. We're pretty pratical people.
We really haven't discussed details, but we have decided that we do want to get married. We figure there's plenty of time for the details. We'll probably end up getting married either on the beach, or very close to it, since we live in Charleston. Its probably going to be between 50-75 guests, so not too large, mostly just close friends and family.
Since we're planning a late summer wedding, we'll either be going somewhere tropical, like the Dominican Republic or Costa Rica, or France (I'm part French and have always wanted to go). Personally, my vote is for France since we already live in beach territory lol.
Well, that's my shorterned intro, hope to be able to get to know some of you!
My name is Cherrish, I'm 27 and have been dating a wonderful man named Larry, who is two years old than myself, for 4 years. We have a wedding tentatively scheduled for about 2 1/2 years from now, but no ring yet. I am a phlebotomist and a CNA, he's a restaurant manager. I am also going to school full-time to become an RN. We have a 2 year old daughter, and I have 2 other daughters from a previous marriage.
Why the long engagement? Simple...with our lives being as busy as they are, we want PLENTY of time to save up for the wedding we really want (and the one I never got to have) and plan it. Its definitely going to be a family affair, complete with kids (ours and everyone else's). Also, I want to either graduate or be within months of getting my degree when the wedding rolls around. We're pretty pratical people.
We really haven't discussed details, but we have decided that we do want to get married. We figure there's plenty of time for the details. We'll probably end up getting married either on the beach, or very close to it, since we live in Charleston. Its probably going to be between 50-75 guests, so not too large, mostly just close friends and family.
Since we're planning a late summer wedding, we'll either be going somewhere tropical, like the Dominican Republic or Costa Rica, or France (I'm part French and have always wanted to go). Personally, my vote is for France since we already live in beach territory lol.
Well, that's my shorterned intro, hope to be able to get to know some of you!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Noobie, Not Yet Engaged
[QUOTE]Why is TK eating everything?
Posted by AudgiePodge[/QUOTE]
IDK aren't you like BFF with the Knot Gods?
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Noobie, Not Yet Engaged : IDK aren't you like BFF with the Knot Gods?
Posted by Ollie08[/QUOTE]
No, they just pay me. I don't ask questions.
[QUOTE]Dude, Audgey, they pay you???
Posted by hellotarra[/QUOTE]
I rake in the big bucks.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Noobie, Not Yet Engaged : No, they just pay me. I don't ask questions.
Posted by AudgiePodge[/QUOTE]
Not even a minute after I posted that it disappeared. I don't think they liked my comment very much. And seriously, you can get paid to be a moderator? Shoot....
[QUOTE]You don't need a ring to be engaged.
Posted by AudgiePodge[/QUOTE]
Agreed, but it seems as though you're planning kind of a lot to be "not planning."
So you are engaged or you are not? I'm confused.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Noobie, Not Yet Engaged : This is an example of a newb who's doing it right. Good stuff DetArt. :)
Posted by yaga13[/QUOTE]
Thanks Yaga.
Common sense up in this noggin :)
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Noobie, Not Yet Engaged : Agreed, but it seems as though you're planning kind of a lot to be "not planning." So you are engaged or you are not? I'm confused.
Posted by DetArt00[/QUOTE]
<div>I like you.</div>
You can be engaged without a ring, but if you want a proposal and ring to consider yourself engaged, then wait until that happens until you start planning your way-far-out wedding.
Therefore I'm going to resort to this:
"His farts smell like Satan's asshole mixed with a skunk's vagina. But it's okay, because I love him." -CSousa
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Noobie, Not Yet Engaged : I like you.
Posted by kaitlynmichelle[/QUOTE]
I like you too :)
ETA: If y'all think this is MUD... you obviously haven't seen real MUD.
[QUOTE]Hi fellow South Carolinian. ETA: If y'all think this is MUD... you obviously haven't seen real MUD.
Posted by Narwhal[/QUOTE]
<div>I was thinking the same thing. She seems alright by me. Not everyone who throws out the "P" word is insta-BSC.</div><div>
</div><div>Welcome to TK (and more importantly, NEY!). There's nothing wrong with saving up before being engaged, you don't have to know all the details to know that money is going to be spent, so every little bit helps. :)</div>
I'm on the NEY board because I'm not yet engaged, as in, I don't have an engagement ring yet.
We have planned a long engagement but are not yet engaged. I don't know how I confused anyone, but if I did, sorry. I didn't realize that I couldn't use engage in any of my sentences
We're not having a destination wedding, as we already live in Charleston. I already listed the reasons we're planning a long engagement, namely life and school. Sorry if you don't agree, it works for us, and we're happy planning a wedding (or at least ballpark ideas) until I get a ring.
[QUOTE]Ooohkayyy, snarky a little much? This was an intro, <strong>I didn't solicit advice</strong>:/ I'm on the NEY board because I'm not yet engaged, as in, I don't have an engagement ring yet. We have planned a long engagement but are not yet engaged. I don't know how I confused anyone, but if I did, sorry. I didn't realize that I couldn't use engage in any of my sentences :/ We're not having a destination wedding, as we already live in Charleston. I already listed the reasons we're planning a long engagement, namely life and school. Sorry if you don't agree, it works for us, and we're happy planning a wedding (or at least ballpark ideas) until I get a ring.
Posted by ClassicNoire[/QUOTE]
True, but what did you expect when you made a post?
Because you're not engaged yet, you should not be planning a wedding. There are many reasons for this. In your case, I would say the best reason is that wedding planning gets old QUICKLY and you don't want to get burned out before you should actually be planning anything. Additionally, since your wedding date timeline is very far off, your tastes will change. There is no reason to waste so much time planning something that will just change in 6 months or a year.
Enjoy your relationship as it is now. There is no need to plan a wedding 2 years in advance. Live in the present and enjoy your BF while he's still your BF. You'll get to go through the stress of planning a wedding when you're actually engaged. Please trust me. It's NOT that much fun.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Noobie, Not Yet Engaged : When are you: Engaged = you are planning a wedding. Not engaged = you are not planning a wedding.
Posted by yaga13[/QUOTE]
<3
I shouldn't be planning a wedding according to...who? There's a rule that says I can't post, chat, communicate with other brides-to-be? I can't look at wedding dresses, cakes or venues online? I can't pin things to my Pinerest board? Who died and made you the authority on who can do what and when?
I enjoy my relationship very much the way it is...if I didn't enjoy it, marriage definitely wouldn't have been talked about. I've already planned a wedding before, so I do know what I'm doing just a little, thanks.
I am BROWSING a wedding website...I haven't made appointments with anyone, signed any contracts, or anything of that nature. My tastes my change, but who made a rule against indulging myself and daydreaming to my hearts content right now?
Didn't think so.
People and their soapboxes, I tells ya...
[QUOTE]<strong>You're</strong> opinion, that's fine. I shouldn't be planning a wedding according to...who? There's a rule that says I can't post, chat, communicate <strong>with other brides-to-be</strong>? I can't look at wedding dresses, cakes or venues online? I can't pin things to my Pinerest board? Who died and made you the authority on who can do what and when? I enjoy my relationship very much the way it is...if I didn't enjoy it, marriage definitely wouldn't have been talked about. <strong>I've already planned a wedding before, so I do know what I'm doing just a little, thanks.</strong>I am BROWSING a wedding website...I haven't made appointments with anyone, signed any contracts, or anything of that nature. My tastes my change, but who made a rule against indulging myself and daydreaming to my hearts content right now? Didn't think so. People and their soapboxes, I tells ya...
Posted by ClassicNoire[/QUOTE]
1. It's your
2. You're not engaged, hence not a "bride-to-be"
3. I don't know that this is relevant OR helps your case
You didn't say you were browsing wedding ideas. You said you had a specific time in mind, a location, and a guest list size. That is a bit more than "daydreaming."
Do what you want. I honestly don't give a f*ck. But if you want to continue to plan your wedding without being engaged, this is the type of response you will find here. We don't endorse BSC.
I always had an idea that I wanted to get married in late summer or early fall. I have allergies, so spring is out and I hate the cold. Summer are brutal here. I hardly call that planning.
And I don't know what BSC is, it wasn't in TK frequently used acronyms.
[QUOTE]Exactly, you DON'T know. I was so stressed out and sick it was ridiculous. So why would I put myself through that again? I always had an idea that I wanted to get married in late summer or early fall. I have allergies, so spring is out and I hate the cold. Summer are brutal here. I hardly call that planning. And I don't know what BSC is, it wasn't in TK frequently used acronyms.
Posted by ClassicNoire[/QUOTE]
It's bat sh!t crazy.
Usually your type gets it by now. You just seem stubborn and unwilling to accommodate any other ideas but your own.
Were you actually engaged the <strong>first</strong> time you were planning a wedding?