I feel strange about this...

aerinpegadrak · March 2010

I found out yesterday from our groomswoman that one of our former colleagues is having his wedding the same weekend as ours.

I don't know, I feel really odd about it. I mean, it's only us and a couple of our guests who would be on both guest lists, but had we not scaled our wedding down to family/WP only, it would have been disastrous. Epic. Like, over 100 people on both guest lists who would have had to choose which to attend.

I know I don't own the weekend or even the day, but I still feel like they must have known that ours was the day before... I mean, you wouldn't schedule your wedding that close to another family member's, right?

Just tell me I'm being nutso so I can move on.

CA2MT4EveR · March 2010

Are you still in contact with this person? Or is it just a person with whom you now share mutual contacts? I think I may be a little irritated, but if there is someone who is a good friend of yours, I would assume they would choose your wedding, or try to make appearances at both.

Around here we have such long winters and busy summers, it's almost impossible to not have weddings or parties scheduled on the same weekend sometimes and we have to make choices

Licia&Wayne · March 2010

Eeeh, I don't think you're nuts. You're not going crazy about it and haranging about what terrible people the other couple is. I think it's okay to feel weird about a seemingly iffy choice of a wedding date.

The great part is, you aren't have a huge wedding, so you won't have the overlap. So, even if it seems really strange for them to have that date, too, it doesn't really matter.

I get where you're coming from. Several of my fiance's cousins and his mom are all planning on getting married this year and the early part of next, as well as several of our friends. It's just kind of like, well...fingers crossed that we can all be there for one another's wedding and not splitting up on the same day!

noodle_oo · March 2010

This person is a former colleague, not family. They have no obligation to try to plan their wedding around yours. They probably picked the weekend that made the most sense to them and their family. Maybe they always dreamed of a spring wedding and this was the only weekend that worked for them or the only weekend their dream venue was available. Seriously, you are overreacting to think it was strange or that they should have picked another day. There are so many things that dictate what day you can have your wedding, the fact that a former colleague is getting married the same day would not even occur to me when planning.

trix1223 · March 2010

Yeah, I love you aerin, but let this go. There's always a reason for the way things turn out, and now you know another one of the reasons that it was the right decision for you to scale back.

The above was said with love.

quotequeen · March 2010

I have a current co-worker with the same date as me. I was a little surprised when she told me (I think I might have actually said "that's my day"), but I got over it quickly. I'm surprised you would have that much overlap with a former colleague though.

trix1223 · March 2010

aerin: pp reminded me: my DD and the teacher who taught about 4 classrooms down from hers had the same wedding date. Somewhat different from yours, but they had so much fun comparing notes and planning together.

Their co-workers threw a combined shower for them as well.

aerinpegadrak · March 2010

Well, we worked together at Disney. So it's sort of family. When a former skip who hadn't worked there in two years passed away recently, there were nearly 200 people at the funeral, mostly Jungle. I don't talk to the groom much, but FI does, and mentored him while they were both there, so he feels even weirder about it. And I feel bad for the two attendants who are declining his to attend ours. (It's the day after ours, but ours is out of town, so they're choosing not to have to rush home.)

Like I said, it's not really a problem now, but it really could have been a disaster. I would have felt like I was making all of my friends choose sides, and we've been looking at this date for nearly two years! So I think it's just residual weirdness.

noodle_oo · March 2010

I think you are reading way too much into this. Just because you have known your date for 2 years and it is very prominent in your mind, even if you told them they probably didn't even realize they scheduled their wedding for the same weekend. Did you cross check your date with all those 200 people before you booked your venue? I doubt it. Neither did they. It isn't even a real problem, so just let it go.

I feel strange about this...

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