I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.

raynes · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:dfe42f02-abee-48fc-8895-3b8f3c1c4acd">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]1. If they are having a stripper come to them, that could be trouble. Strippers make enough money inside they club. Strippers that work outside the club usually do extras. 2. She can't sleep w/o him for one night? Take a fucking sleeping pill and deal with it. 3. I wonder who her ex had an affair with?
Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

Ehh, for my H's bach party they got a stripper to come to his bff/BM's house. But more so because my H hates strip clubs and once the party got started the guys decided that it wasn't a bach party without a stripper. They did do body shots though. The horror.

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

I kind of want to give her a hug.

Here is my take on the strippers thing:
I would go to a strip club with H. That doesn't bother me. What would bother me is touching. Because if stripper touchs him, then he touches me, I've touched stripper. And strippers touch an array of nasty people that I don't want to touch.

I also realize that even though H loves me, he will notice hot girls. As long as that is all, we are fine. I still notice hot girls too. It's just human nature.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:c676fe65-acb5-4bbd-b9df-2531ca6cb31c">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her. : ditto here. In all fairness, though, they have kids. I'm less judgy to her, though, because i dont' think she's saying anything her FI disagrees with, ya know? I think she's more worried about what his friends are going to do. P.S. YGPM
Posted by Steph0871[/QUOTE]

Gawd my internet is slow today.

Anyway - yeah. YGPM back :)

AdeleDazeem · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:3d3762f1-cea4-4933-9d9d-597b89354741">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]I didn't know married people weren't allowed to dance.. : (
Posted by PharmacyBride[/QUOTE]

It's best you know now so you can get all your dancing out of your system before the wedding.

People are weird.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

I agree jas, looking is one thing. But touching? Ew, no, don't come home and rub up on me after some stripper has been grinding on your lap. The thought grosses me out.

My mom used to freak me the hell out as a kid and teen by saying that any time you have sex with someone, you're having sex with anyone they ever slept with. It was her logic for making sure I didn't become a tramp, I guess, but I think it scarred me for life.

Steph0871 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:c8a4f43d-c0d1-40f3-9709-66d717eba8a2">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]I wandered over there for a read and don't see what there is to be annoyed about. She trusts him. She realizes this is ultimately her issue. She just needs to talk through it. Lambasting her over here for it seems unnecessary.
Posted by Celles[/QUOTE]

I agree. I think she was just venting?

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:c8a4f43d-c0d1-40f3-9709-66d717eba8a2">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]I wandered over there for a read and don't see what there is to be annoyed about. She trusts him. She realizes this is ultimately her issue. She just needs to talk through it. <strong> Lambasting her over here for it seems unnecessary.</strong>
Posted by Celles[/QUOTE]

You're right.

I guess I just have a tendency to judge things immediately - and the whole bach-party anxiety thing gets me every single time.

redheadfsu · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:dfe42f02-abee-48fc-8895-3b8f3c1c4acd">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]1. If they are having a stripper come to them, that could be trouble. Strippers make enough money inside they club. Strippers that work outside the club usually do extras. 2. She can't sleep w/o him for one night? Take a fucking sleeping pill and deal with it. 3. I wonder who her ex had an affair with?
Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

This. Strip clubs ok, but private at home strippers are different.

SarahPLiz · August 2010

AATB- YGPM

goheels05 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:774d196b-4a5c-45fe-a878-aa57283e9784">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her. : You're right. I guess I just have a tendency to judge things immediately - and the whole bach-party anxiety thing gets me every single time.
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

I look at it this way: If it had been a lurker posting it over here on SB, a lot more of us would be telling her to STFU and quit being a brat. JMO.

Steph0871 · August 2010

AATB- Don't worry about it. I typically have that instant gut reaction to anything dollar dance related. I just avoid those posts on my local board now... haha

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:24c31610-ccfe-4abe-9bda-2dfbdb9974eb">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]AATB- Don't worry about it. I typically have that instant gut reaction to anything dollar dance related. I just avoid those posts on my local board now... haha
Posted by Steph0871[/QUOTE]

Lol - nice :)

MarriedInAFever · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:c8a4f43d-c0d1-40f3-9709-66d717eba8a2">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]I wandered over there for a read and don't see what there is to be annoyed about. She trusts him. She realizes this is ultimately her issue. She just needs to talk through it. <strong> Lambasting her over here for it seems unnecessary.</strong>
Posted by Celles[/QUOTE]

This. I agree co-dependency is annoying. But I understand why she's apprehensive and venting.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

Got your pm Sarah!

maratea · August 2010

I get why she's voicing her concerns, but at the same time, I don't think this is appropriate place to do it. Maybe she should speak to the guys hosting the party and stress to her FI why it makes her uncomfortable.

Also, I feel like a ho considering what happened when I went a strip club with my friends (before I was married, but while engaged). And H went to a strip club and had boobs in his face. Like the stripper smashed his face into her chest. He had a bruised nose the next day. Haha, boobface.

SarahPLiz · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:a44fdbab-ad50-48ee-ba5b-8993191c4f2f">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]Got your pm Sarah!
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

<div>Merci, madame</div>

katiewhompus · August 2010

Honestly I would be incredibly angry at Scott if he went to a strip club tonight and spent $200. I think if you have talked to a Fi/Bf/Dh about your insecurities or dislike towards a certain thing (within reason) it is incredibly disrespectful to just go ahead and do it. I also still don't understand the "it's his money" arguement. If he spends $200 on something that means that I have to spend $200 to make up for it will bills, so it's not like it doesn't affect me just because he made the money.

That being said, I didn't go home after my bachelorette party. I had a crazy threesome with my bm and my bff...not really, but we did all crash in the same hotel bed lol.

Scott had an impromptu bachelor party after the RD. Bil got a hummer limo and the boys decided to go to Dave and Buster's for some fun. Except they left the RD at 9pm, it was a 2 1/2 hour drive, and D&B closes at midnight. Good job planning

One of his friends was talking all night about how he was going to get Scott wasted at his party. I told him he could do what he wanted but that if he missed our wedding or was hung over during the ceremony I was going to be really upset and it would make me a bit untrusting of his judgement. Sil told Bil if Scott showed up hung-over he (bil) had better not be planning on coming home that night.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

Those sound like some hardcore boobs maratea.

Katie - the one thing I did tell Ben was that there would be no partying after the rehearsal dinner. Last year when my sister got married, I sat at the same table as her ushers at their RD - and they were asking me about where all the good bars were in town. Really? You're gonna go out and get smashed and show up hungover tomorrow to my little sister's wedding, escorting her guests to their seats smelling like whiskey? Nice.

I know that he'll have friends in town - as will I - but the whole day of the wedding we'll be with them and we'll be dancing and partying all night. The night before - you better not be going out and getting drunk. The last thing I want is a hungover bunch of groomsmen - or worse - hungover groom - on our wedding day.

NO!

katiewhompus · August 2010

Exactly. You can get as drunk as you want Wednesday night (but they stayed in and played video games while I was at my party) but if you show up hungover/late to the wedding it's not going to be a happy day. Especially since they had to be fully dressed and at the venue (30 minute drive from hotel) by 1:30pm.

At first I didn't like his friend at all. When he first called to tell him he was engaged the friend was like "Dude, seriously? Why the fvck would you want to ruin your life like that?" and spent 20 minutes trying to talk him out of it.
Then at one point the three of us were hanging out and A went "So how old are you anyways? You don't look like a 30 year old." (He and Dh were both 35). I laugh and go "25" and he goes "Shiit. Hey Scott, how'd you hit the jackpot dude?"

Boys...

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

I don't think anyone is one-upping. Some people have reasons why strip clubs make them uncomfortable. I haven't had any experience in my past or with H that left a bad impression. I think they can be fun once in a while, but my H isn't interested at all.
Different strokes, I suppose.

Maybe it would bother me more if the strippers here would good looking? Because they definitely aren't.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

I'm with you, OWN. I hate strip clubs and told H I didn't want any at his bach party. I honestly don't care if people think that makes me sound insecure or whatever else. Luckily I didn't have to worry about it. H had already told his best man that if any showed up he was leaving.

But my H is the same way, he hates the thought of me getting all hot and bothered watching another guy strip. Fortunately for him I cringe at the very thought.

ohwhynot · August 2010

This particular thread isn't full of one-upping - you're right. But bach party threads and porn threads tend to go in that direction. If you're (the generic "you") cool with it, fine, but that doesn't mean that anyone who isn't is necessarily uptight or needs to be smacked or needs to grow up.

katiewhompus · August 2010

I feel like that's calmed down a lot too OWN, especially compared to 3 years ago. If you didn't like strip clubs you were immediately insecure and didn't trust your Dh while it seems to have calmed down now.

I hate them, and I hated porn for a long time. I'm starting to come around to it now but it's taking some time.

sarah0725 · August 2010

OWN, I'm with you. I have no problem with people who are strippers, because I give anyone props who can find ways to charm stupid men out of their money, but I am really glad that FI isn't interested in having his bachelor party at a strip club. Just like I'm really hoping that nobody thinks I want a penis lollipop or anything at mine. It all seems kind of juvenile.

maratea · August 2010

Hmm, I can't help but think that was directed at me. Sorry if I came across that way, it wasn't what I intended. And like I said before, I understand the concern that particular poster had. I might feel the same way if an ex had cheated on me the night of his bach. party. But, again, I don't know that this is the best place to get advice or even vent.
If her concerns were that big, she needed to talk to her FI and the guys planning the party. And she should trust her FI enough that if a situation with strippers did happen, he would leave or make the stripper(s) leave.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

I actually don't like strippers or strip clubs - they're not for me. Maybe I'm just weird in the sense that it doesn't bother me if my fiance is around it.

I think no matter WHAT the opinions are about them - as long as both people in the couple are on the same page about it, then there's just no problem to be had.

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

I understand why anyone wouldn't want their signifcant other at a strip club or watching pornography. Basically, you are lusting after someone else, when you should be lusting after the one you are with.

I, personally, find the strip clubs here to be way to silly to be actually sexy. I think my H could look at a woman and appreciate her beauty without thinking about doing her. (Or maybe I am terribly naive) because I look at men and women and think "She/he is hot" without it going any further in my head.

ohwhynot · August 2010

Maratea, it wasn't directed at you. It was more of a generalized "here we go" post that, in reality, had more to do with OTHER discussions I've seen on the subject.

ETA: AATB: you're not "weird" because it doesn't bother you if your H goes to strip clubs, but the people who are bothered aren't "weird," either, in my opinion.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_im-bitch-just-want-smack-her?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f439fab-ec88-45bf-85d5-674f0b70d106Post:072e66bc-35de-446a-b4c8-b6ccedec2ed7">Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.</a>:
[QUOTE]Maratea, it wasn't directed at you. It was more of a generalized "here we go" post that, in reality, had more to do with OTHER discussions I've seen on the subject. ETA: AATB: you're not "weird" because it doesn't bother you if your H goes to strip clubs, but the people who are bothered aren't "weird," either, in my opinion.
Posted by ohwhynot[/QUOTE]

Opinion respected, OWN :)

ohwhynot · August 2010

You're weird for lots of other reasons, though. ;-)

I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.

Re: I'm a bitch... I just want to smack her.

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