Dear Amy: I have a friend who always makes negative comments about me. For instance, she'll pull on my gray hair and say "Letting yourself go?"
She laughed in disbelief when I told her I go biking, as if I'm not capable of exercise! Weight — mine, hers, anyone's — is a major topic of conversation.
Nothing about my life is off limits to her; she'll make a crack about everything (my home, my looks, my cleanliness, etc)! She makes racist comments about others.
I've considered being direct but kind (the "you hurt my feelings" approach), but I really want to just insult her!
I'm concerned she'll make comments about or to my children, and I'm to the point of not wanting to be around her, but our kids have become close friends. I really believe she's just clueless and not malicious.
She had a horrible upbringing and now a terrible marriage. This behavior might just be "normal" for her.
What do you suggest?
— Stuck