Catholic Weddings

New here

Hello ladies. This is my first time here on the board. I am not Catholic, but my FI is. I was raised protestant and was very dedicated to my church fellowship growing up, though I have not attended church regularly for quite a while. We have decided to get married in FI's family church, but to not have a full mass. I don't know much about the Catholic faith, so I have been reading this board today in hopes of learning more. I also had a strange question... When I was born, my mother had a priest come and baptize me. I have been told that because of that I am technically Catholic. Is that true? I am just curious. Thanks.

Re: New here

  • If it was a Catholic priest, yes.  Several other sects call their leaders priests (such as episcopalian) but you would not be catholic if they baptized you. If you were baptized by a Catholic priest, then whatever parish he is from should have you in their records for baptisms. 

    Contact the priest at the parish you will be marrying in, and you will begin a pre-nuptial investigation, they will give you guidence to find some sort of baptismal certificate. 
  • The priest who baptized me was catholic. My grandmother told me that she has a certificate, but I don't know if that is what you are talking about.
  • How strange -- is your mother or any member of her family Catholic?  I find it odd that one would baptize a baby in a church they didn't follow.

    If you were baptized by a Catholic priest, it should be on record at that priest's parish.  You should check with your grandmother and then talk to the priest who is marrying you like Agape suggested.

    Welcome to the board!
  • VJones1981VJones1981 member
    100 Comments
    edited May 2012
    My mother was raised Catholic, but she passed away when I was young. I was raised by family across the country and they were not Catholic.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_new-here-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:7172e2e4-8139-46be-9640-321811b9b462Post:9f8a1135-5534-4a9a-96b5-0aa98ca98e92">Re:New here</a>:
    [QUOTE]My mother was raised Catholic, but she passed away when I was young. I was raised by family across the country and they were not Catholic.
    Posted by VJones1981[/QUOTE]

    Well, I'm very sorry to hear that.  Definitely check with your grandmother (or the church your mother would have baptized you in, if you know it) and see what you can find.

    It won't prevent you from having a ceremony without mass, but it does make a difference.  Were you baptized in the Protestant church in which you were raised?
  • The certificate that your grandmother has should give you the name of the priest and hopefully the parish. The priest or deacon that helps you prepare for marriage will help you do the next steps. 
  • I don't have anything to add to what PPs have said about the baptism situation, but wanted to tell you welcome! Smile
  • Thanks ladies. I'm going to start by talking to my grandmother and go from there.
  • I'm sorry about your mother. You definitely need to find out if your grandmother has that certificate. That's step 1. If it says Catholic then you were indeed baptised Catholic. This, however, does not mean you are completely and wholey Catholic. My FI was baptized Catholic but didn't get any of his other sacraments so when I chose to convert, he joined the program (RCIA) along with me to receive the rest of his sacraments.

    A Catholic person does not have to marry another Catholic. There are different forms of the ceremony depending on the couple's wants and needs. My suggestion would be to meet with your FI's priest after you find your baptism paperwork. The priest would be able to guide you as far as what else you may need or want to do.

    "being Catholic" is more of the practice of the faith as a whole, in particular, being confirmed and being able to participate in communion, which is at the center of the faith. Being baptized is a good thing, and I'm sure your FI's priest will be happy to hear that you are, but it doesn't make you Catholic. You followed Protestant for most of your life, so you would associate yourself with that first.

    You should find your baptism papers or at least the name of the priest before you and your FI go forward with your wedding plans. I know from my own experience that one of the first things they are going to ask for is your baptism certificate. If you know the name of the priest and/or his church or diocese when he did your baptism, they may be able to look up your record if you can't produce a certificate. They won't just take your word. I carried my papers with me for several months because I was always being asked to produce them. By now my church must have 5 copies, but they definitely know I was baptized!!

    Welcome to the boards, good luck with your wedding planning. Some boards on here are nicer than others. I've been a member since last year, but have only recently begun adding my 2 cents to the mix! I like this board, it's been very helpful since my completion of RCIA and planning the ceremony, and I'm a DIY Bride (to an extent) so I've been frequenting that board as well. They are probably the friendliest on here! Feel free to post and PM if you ever want to chat!!
  • Actually, this isn't true. A Baptized Catholic is always a Catholic....especially in regards to being bound by canon law in marriage. 
  • I was rereading what I wrote and maybe I didn't phrase myself right. Yes, you are considered Catholic when you are baptized Catholic, I was trying to say that in our church and diocese thay put a big emphasis on the difference between people saying they are Catholic and people actually being Catholic. Meaning that you can be baptized, yet haven't been in a church in decades and say I'm Catholic. Or you can attend church daily or weekly, go to confession, volunteer, and try to live your life based on the teachings of the church and say you're Catholic. Maybe I should have clarified that. I see where I said it doesn't make you Catholic and I know that's not true, at least not in that sense.

    Athough, now i'm wondering. The OP mentioned growing up Protestant and being active in that faith. Don' Protestant churches have their own sort of "sacraments" you go through? So wouldn't she have to take some sort of oath that her baptism is Catholic? I was baptized Lutheran but went to Sunday school and grew up in a ECC church. When I went through RCIA I had to stand with 2 others who weren't baptized Catholic and affirm my baptism commitment to the Catholic church. Would the same thing have to happen here?

    I think maybe I'm confusing myself now...
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