Are you having a DOC or a friend help instead?

Sara191431 · March 2010

FI and I are going back and forth on hiring a DOC, the one I'm interested in getting is $500, which if you've looked that's on the cheap end of the scale. FI can't quite comprehend how important they are.

We plan on having a ton of votive candles, 800+, 12,000 rose petals etc. The candles in itself will take a while to light, as well as the DOC says she can set up chair covers etc., not to mention all the other things they help with. We are doing our ceremony and reception at the same place so the changover part is what worries me.

I was thinking of asking a friend of mine that helped my MOH with her wedding and offering her $250 plus dinner if she would basically be my DOC/PA. Obviously she's not a professional though so I think that amount is good and worth it.

If you are having a friend and not a DOC are you confident in that??? Oh and from what I understand my venue doesn't get that involved w/set up etc. on the day of, but just handle the changeover in moving the tables and chairs. TIA.

kkaew816 · March 2010

I'm having a DOC instead of a friend because I don't want to make my friends or family (or myself or FI for that matter) work on my wedding, I want them to enjoy it, my FI feels the same way which is why we hired on. We are on a very tight budget, but felt the $500 we'll be spending on our DOC will be well worth it.

Bimbi284 · March 2010

A friend of my mom's will be doing DOC work for us...she is doing it as her gift to me and FI, but we'll probably compensate her in some way as well. She works at a company that puts on consumer shows with my mom (RV show, ice fishing show, etc), so she knows what its like to work events.

I think it is SUPER important to have someone there the day of to take care of those little details for you so you don't have to worry about them. Just make sure it is someone who understands your vision and will know how to set everything up/work with your vendors! I think its fine to have a friend do this!

Clare13 · March 2010

I am not having a DOC. My church provides a Wedding Day Coordinator that takes care of everything at the church. The church policy actually asks that if you hire a DOC they do not come to the church. And my hall has a hall coordinator that takes care of mishaps in set-up, dealing with vendors, etc. I will have 3 friends set-up decorations in the hall in the morning. After that, I am confident that one of the two coordinators included with our venues will take care of major problems. I will specify one friend as a main contact for them to go to if needed. (I am doing the same thing for her wedding 1 month earlier.) Hopefully it will all work out in the end and I won't regret not getting a DOC.

shameless_ad · March 2010

I am asking a friend to do it, for a couple of reasons. First is to save money - I know we could find a DOC for a reasonable price, but anything we can save helps. Second is because I have a friend who I know wanted to be involved and help out, but with our small private ceremony, I couldn't include her in the wedding party. And third, the friend I asked has coordinated large-scale events as part of her job for many years, so I know she'll be great at it. Plus, she has a great artistic eye, so I'm confident that everything will look fabulous!

izzyjenni · March 2010

We are hiring a DOC that just got started with her own business in DOC. She worked for another company as an assistant and is building up her portfolio. So she is charing us $400 to do it. My mom is doing the flowers and decoration before hand in creating them, but I want someone else to take care of setting them all up on our big day. I would feel much more at peace if my mom isn't freaking out over the decor and didn't want to make a friend who is inexperienced do it. I would rather get upset over a DOC messing up than a friend...ha, ha. So I think it is vital to have someone to do it even if it is a friend. You shouldn't have to worry or stress about those things on your big day. My FI thinks it is silly, but guys just don't understand!

hkiesling · March 2010

800 candles is a LOT of candles to light. That's a pretty nice friend.

Just sayin'....

beka0404 · March 2010

I don't mean to sound discouraging, but I would tread very carefully on the "paying a friend" route. If she doesn't live up to your expectations, it may negatively impact the friendship.

My fiancé was opposed to the DOC idea when I originally proposed the idea, but two months later I reintroduced the topic, and he's on board. Just something to consider!

drdifabio · March 2010

We are hiring a DOC - I just dont want to put that on a friend to do. Plus there is peace of mind knowing that my DOC has done this before and will be able to weather anything that happens.

LittleSweetie · March 2010

We hired a DOC to take care of all those details for us and for me to keep my sanity leading up to the wedding

leggwilliams · March 2010

I'd suggest taking your FI along to some consultations with DOCs. My FI was pretty weary of the whole idea but I talked him into coming with me to meet a few. Once he saw all of the things that they offer and will take care of (heard their "sales pitch", I guess) he realized the massive benefit and agreed that we should find room in our budget.

sclo0801 · March 2010

Do you have names and numbers for these DOCs? I am looking for one but I cannot go over $500. That is already stretching my budget to the max! Thanks

Sara191431 · March 2010

Thanks for the advice ladies. Let me explain a little more of what I mean as a friend doing it. She is more so a friend of a friend, very nice girl but for example she wouldn't have been invited to our wedding, I don't say that in a mean way but to point out that we aren't like very close friends or anything, just like I wouldn't be invited to her wedding when she gets married. Not to say that wouldn't change in the future cause she took me up on the offer and is excited about it, so yay! She's done some event planning herself and loves it, so that is why my MOH suggested it and that's also why we will be compensating her some and paying for her dinner etc.

In regards to the 800 candles, no I wouldn't say to a friend, can you please light 800 candles for me. Even now with my PA/DOC, it won't just be her doing all the candles etc., some other people will be helping too.

sclo0801 - For $500 the DOC I met with is Stephanie from First Blush Bride, www.firstblushbride.com. If we didn't end up deciding on the friend route, we def. would have went with her, and she has great reviews!

csimpson2010 · March 2010

We are using At Your Service Weddings. I thought about using a friend or my PA for about two seconds because I have heard too many stories of things happen when friends help. Professionals know how long it takes to get things done so there isn't a problem with the timeline. I had a friend use a Shout Wipe on her friends wedding dress right before pictures and it left a stain! I asked Lora with AYSW what she would do in this situation for an interview question and it seemed like she knew quite a bit about different dress materials. She said that without knowing what material the dress material was, she would have hid the stain with white chalk she carries on the day of the wedding. It sounds like different dress materials are all handled differently. She has really proven to me that she knows what she is doing when she saw my timeline and I said that it was going to take one person twenty minutes to put on 200 chair covers. Oops. It takes way longer than that I guess. These are things that friends don't know and a professional does. A co-worker told me that her church wedding coordinator didn't show up for rehearsal and her DOC jumped right in for rehearsal. I don't want anything like that to happen to me that weekend! And, if you think that you can't find the money in your budget, think of it this way, extra candles or extra flowers are not going to save the day when something goes wrong.

Sara191431 · March 2010

csimpson - Thanks for the advise, all valid points. After talking with my PA/DOC/friend, I'm more confident she'll do a good job. She's done more events than I knew about, plus I can do some research on things that go wrong etc. so I have that ready to go just in case. GREAT tip on the chalk thing though, will def. be buying some white chalk now just in case!

Overall, I know my friend isn't a professional DOC but I think I'm pretty confident in her and seeing as I'm such a planner, between her and I I think it will work out fine. We shall see I guess! All great tips/advice though!

kkaew816 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_having-doc-friend-instead?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:81Discussion:66f1de0c-9298-4abc-be3b-ae1aed0f1550Post:69ab3059-d4a3-453e-b873-cb9d89fcea1f">Re: Are you having a DOC or a friend help instead?</a>:
[QUOTE]Do you have names and numbers for these DOCs? I am looking for one but I cannot go over $500. That is already stretching my budget to the max! Thanks
Posted by sclo0801@stcloudstate.edu[/QUOTE]

I'm using Diana Reecy, she has her own business called Exquisite Events Twin Cities. We've met with her once and she's been great so far and in your price range. Here's her website:
<a href="http://www.exquisiteeventstwincities.com/">http://www.exquisiteeventstwincities.com/</a>

Are you having a DOC or a friend help instead?

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