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Wedding Etiquette Forum
Need the vent
My FI called me with a great money saving idea for our wedding 116 days out and I'm not happy.
The church that we planned to get married in his families church, they have had connections with the church for over 50 yrs. His parents and 2 of his sisters were married there. All of the children and grandchildren have been baptized there, so I understood why he wanted to get married there. The cost is pretty steep, $2000 and that is the member discount.
Being budget conscious I looked into other locations that were not as expensive a long time ago. We discussed them and he said at the time it was worth spending the $2000, so we booked it. So case closed right? Not quite.
Today he calls me and says that he's been thinking and if we don't have the wedding at the $2000 church we could put that money to better use after the wedding. Mind you this was a big part of my argument when I found other locations. I believe the money could go to better uses, so that isn't the issue.
The issue is that we only have one option, get married at the reception location. There is no added fee for this, so it make the most sense. I understand that but I'm ticked that my FI came to see this now. We have no other options, so it's either shell out $2K or the reception location. Everything else less expensive is booked.
This is the 2nd time he has done this when it comes to wedding planning. I wanted a less expensive photographer and he kept at it till I agreed to the more expensive photographer. He then changed his mind saying we could save money on the photography. Luckily we found the perfect photographer that fits in out budget.
I really think he's a groomzilla, I don't even know if he listened to me before about how we could save money.
Also we work together, so he told me this just before stepping into a 2-hour meeting, great. I gave him the icy stare when I walked [past the conference room. I know childish but I'm upset.
When he gets out we are going to have a serious talk, because I am expecting next he will want to cut the pricey jazz band that he would not relent on having.
I know why I drink!
The church that we planned to get married in his families church, they have had connections with the church for over 50 yrs. His parents and 2 of his sisters were married there. All of the children and grandchildren have been baptized there, so I understood why he wanted to get married there. The cost is pretty steep, $2000 and that is the member discount.
Being budget conscious I looked into other locations that were not as expensive a long time ago. We discussed them and he said at the time it was worth spending the $2000, so we booked it. So case closed right? Not quite.
Today he calls me and says that he's been thinking and if we don't have the wedding at the $2000 church we could put that money to better use after the wedding. Mind you this was a big part of my argument when I found other locations. I believe the money could go to better uses, so that isn't the issue.
The issue is that we only have one option, get married at the reception location. There is no added fee for this, so it make the most sense. I understand that but I'm ticked that my FI came to see this now. We have no other options, so it's either shell out $2K or the reception location. Everything else less expensive is booked.
This is the 2nd time he has done this when it comes to wedding planning. I wanted a less expensive photographer and he kept at it till I agreed to the more expensive photographer. He then changed his mind saying we could save money on the photography. Luckily we found the perfect photographer that fits in out budget.
I really think he's a groomzilla, I don't even know if he listened to me before about how we could save money.
Also we work together, so he told me this just before stepping into a 2-hour meeting, great. I gave him the icy stare when I walked [past the conference room. I know childish but I'm upset.
When he gets out we are going to have a serious talk, because I am expecting next he will want to cut the pricey jazz band that he would not relent on having.
I know why I drink!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Need the vent
Do you have invitations made already with the church info on them? Will his family be upset if you don't get married there?
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BFP 8/01/12, EDD 04/10/12, mm/c @ 6wks, discovered at 8wks, D&C 9/05/12
[QUOTE]What is the reception location's ceremony location like? If it's not bad, I know it sucks he took this long to come around, but if you won't lose any deposits to the church, go for it! Posted by FutureMrsTR[/QUOTE]
The room we would use is decent looking we could have the ceremony in front of the fireplace. We have until 90 days before to get our full deposit back.
I'm going try to come up with some ideas to make it more of a ceremony space and not just some room.
I would just sit down with him and maybe go over the rest of the big expenses and make sure you're both on the same page going forward. Explain to him how making changes now to big things won't be very easy.