HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.

HobokensFury · January 2013

No one is violating the TOS. It was just starting to get ugly. I was just doing my sometimes unpopular job. Just so you know TK Gods do monitor the threads.

zitiqueen · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:f9f58e00-7c40-47d2-b133-f0052eb59c64">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]No one is violating the TOS. It was just starting to get ugly. I was just doing my sometimes unpopular job. Just so you know TK Gods do monitor the threads.
Posted by HobokenBride2012[/QUOTE]

I would have bet they didn't even know these boards existed.

HobokensFury · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:2f045801-af05-43ee-8d92-484ca2f3e836">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops. : I would have bet they didn't even know these boards existed.
Posted by zitiqueen[/QUOTE]

Trust me I was just as surprised as you are.

rajahmd · January 2013

Oh, I didn't realize the conversation was continuing. I have a question to pose to y'all related to flip-flop like shoes at weddings.

I have to wear Crocs to my wedding. No, not the clogs with the holes. But a pair of their dress shoes or flip-flops. I have very poor knees (as evidenced by my surgery last week) and chronic back pain. Crocs are the only dress shoes I've been able to wear in recent years without being miserable. Unfortunately, Crocs have a bad reputation as ugly shoes.

So, basically, my question is: if you were a guest at my wedding, would you side-eye me wearing Crocs with my wedding dress?

To get an idea, here's some links:

the dress, in Watermelon: http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Elegant-Satin-and-Chiffon-Ball-Gown-F14050

Haven't decided on the exact shoe style yet, but these are the leaders right now:

http://www.crocs.com/crocs-kadee/11215,default,pd.html?cid=48J&cgid=women-footwear in Navy

or

http://www.crocs.com/crocs-patricia-iv/11661,default,pd.html?cid=46K&cgid=women-footwear&prefn1=refinementColor&prefv1=Blue&prefn2=variationSize&prefv2=10 also in Navy

daveANDkristen · January 2013

Rachel - I could care less what shoes a bride is wearing (and being that you'll be a bride in a hot pink dress I doubt your footwear is the first thing they'll notice!). I like the first pair better but I think if you could find a comfortable shoe (even Crocs) in pink, they would draw less attention than navy.

rajahmd · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:a2cb7e12-8aa5-424e-9548-c9b15c4db674">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]Rachel - I could care less what shoes a bride is wearing (and being that you'll be a bride in a hot pink dress I doubt your footwear is the first thing they'll notice!). I like the first pair better but I think if you could find a comfortable shoe (even Crocs) in pink, they would draw less attention than navy.
Posted by daveANDkristen[/QUOTE]

<div>Thanks for the insight! Yeah, a hot pink dress will definitely attrack attention. I was kinda hoping ot go with blue shoes as my "something blue". Unfortunately, I haven't really been able to a pink in Crocs that would work well with the pink of my dress. What would look better: a complementary blue or a mismatched pink? I'm horrible with women's fashion. Put me in a men's dress store and I'll find to perfect tie for every shirt. Put me in a women's dress store and I'll be lost for hours.</div>

Peledreamsofrain · January 2013

A lot of territory has been covered here, and I wish the OP would answer some of the questions. I kind of wonder if this was a MUD post, but it does bring up some interesting things to discuss.

Something that I didn't see already really explored is the possibility that the groom has a valid reason for wearing flip flops. It's possible that he has foot problems that make wearing normal shoes uncomfortable, especially formal shoes (bunions, club foot, etc). It's also possible that he comes from a culture that normally would get married in sandals, as someone mentioned earlier, and he honestly doesn't see the issue (or maybe is kind of insulted how mad his bride is getting over it).

I dunno, I'm kind of on the fence, and wish we had more info. I feel compromising on both sides could happen here. I mean, if my H had kaboshed my idea of going barefoot and wearing custom foot jewelry, it would have really taken some of the fun of the day away from me. Everything else I compromised on, and everything else I shifted to accomodate others. But not my feet jewelry darnit, those were to please me and me alone.

Tough call here.

rajahmd · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:ac63266b-1886-402d-903b-0d7460de88a5">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]Rachel, I'd go with the blue if the pink won't match your dress. And I can honestly say, having been a BM 7 times (9 really, but only made it all the way to the wedding day for 7) and been a guest at countless other weddings, I have never noticed what shoes the bride is wearing unless she specifically comes up and shows me. I have knee problems too, which is why I was in squishy foam flip flops under my wedding dress though I would never wear them to someone ELSE's wedding. Trust me, you being comfortable and pain free is far more important that what other people think.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

<div>Thanks for the advice. I definitely plan on wearing Crocs no matter. I just kinda wanted to get a feel for it I'll hear comments about it on my wedding day, or later, like through the grape vine.</div><div>
</div><div>Honestly, I asked this guestion because I have an aunt who despises Crocs, regardless of what they look like (she can be a bit of a snob a times). I'm kinda worried that while she might not mention anything negative on the day of, she might either bring people's attention to my shoes or make comments later on down the road that could end up getting back to me. </div>

rajahmd · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:d788f43c-e112-498e-8b8a-92f8060254c1">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops. : Meh, if she does then SHE will look petty and rude. Don't let it get to you.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

<div>Thanks for the moral support and putting it in perspective! I will definitely try. You'd think I'd be used to her mocking my shoes by now, since like 90% of the shoes I own are Crocs. </div>

rajahmd · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:14c9c8e6-1622-4995-b85c-e05eed77639b">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]Rachel, I like the first pair (Kadee) better and I think the navy will be nice with the pink. I hate crocs, but if that is all you can wear, then wear them. Your aunt will have to get over it.
Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]

<div>Thanks! I'm showing the shoes I found to my fiance tonight, to get his insight. He's much better with women's fashion than I am.</div>

daveANDkristen · January 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:cdddb9c7-5181-4557-824a-7542f4961382">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops. : Thanks for the insight! Yeah, a hot pink dress will definitely attrack attention. I was kinda hoping ot go with blue shoes as my "something blue". <strong>Unfortunately, I haven't really been able to a pink in Crocs that would work well with the pink of my dress.</strong> What would look better: a complementary blue or a mismatched pink? I'm horrible with women's fashion. Put me in a men's dress store and I'll find to perfect tie for every shirt. Put me in a women's dress store and I'll be lost for hours.
Posted by RachelBFMD[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I wasn't sure about that either. The Raspberry color for the Crocs might match well, but it's hard to tell comparing two images on a monitor. Either way, I wouldn't worry too much about what other people think, I'm sure you'll look great!

I dyed my crinoline blue and I'm sure some people thought it looked stupid (just judging from the honest Knotties who have said the same). Doesn't bother me!

joojoobean · January 2013

Our wedding isn't fancy at all. It will be very tasteful, but I have a new job that takes 60+ hours of my time each week. I haven't had time to be a bridezilla ;) We got engaged in July and I'm just barely starting things. We haven't even gotten engagement pics! He's been very supportive, but this is the one thing he would like a say in. I'm hoping in time and with me not pushing, he'll cave. If I felt very strongly about something I did/didn't want, he would support it. Flips flops though?? ;)

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:d6a23241-2ba1-4b85-893f-e6b341e7e34f">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]That's a big;stance to take. I'm going to suggest that there's something else going on here. Maybe he sees you concentrating on the wedding stuff and he feels like he is only necessary as an actor, to play The Man in your wedding play - so he's trying to be HEARD by saying something outrageous? Maybe he really doesn't want to have the wedding that's planned, so he's trying to sabatage it? Maybe he's trying to teach you a lesson about planning a rich person's wedding with all the fancy crap, while he feels that you two should be more authentic to who you really are as a couple? Maybe he feels that the focus has been entirely on the money and the spending of money. You could schedule a meeting with you and FI and your officiant and get re-centered on the real spiritual reason for this event....?
Posted by Kristin789[/QUOTE]

mcda04 · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:6e3dd3ab-0ac5-4f37-92c6-9b155717d3e8">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops. : Thanks! I'm showing the shoes I found to my fiance tonight, to get his insight. He's much better with women's fashion than I am.
Posted by RachelBFMD[/QUOTE]
I despise Crocs (the big bulky ones). Or at least I thought I did until I found the flats at Big Lots one time. They're sooo comfortable. I have constant lower back pain and these shoes feel like pillows and since they're so light, it kinda helps. If these will make you happy, wear them, who cares what your aunt thinks.

I just browsed the website and saw these two styles. To me, the Kaydee's are just fine. If you're iffy, these might also work for you.

<a href="http://www.crocs.com/crocs-jayna/11851,default,pd.html?cid=602&cgid=women-footwear-flats" rel="nofollow">http://www.crocs.com/crocs-jayna/11851,default,pd.html?cid=602&cgid=women-footwear-flats</a>

<a href="http://www.crocs.com/crocs-womens-waveseeker-ballet-flat/OM346,default,pd.html?cid=6N7&cgid=women-footwear-flats" rel="nofollow">http://www.crocs.com/crocs-womens-waveseeker-ballet-flat/OM346,default,pd.html?cid=6N7&cgid=women-footwear-flats</a>

rajahmd · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:bf1436d3-9b36-4217-b89c-5337b5a03731">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops. : I despise Crocs (the big bulky ones). Or at least I thought I did until I found the flats at Big Lots one time. They're sooo comfortable. I have constant lower back pain and these shoes feel like pillows and since they're so light, it kinda helps. If these will make you happy, wear them, who cares what your aunt thinks. I just browsed the website and saw these two styles. To me, the Kaydee's are just fine. If you're iffy, these might also work for you. <a href="http://www.crocs.com/crocs-jayna/11851,default,pd.html?cid=602&cgid=women-footwear-flats" rel="nofollow">http://www.crocs.com/crocs-jayna/11851,default,pd.html?cid=602&cgid=women-footwear-flats</a> <a href="http://www.crocs.com/crocs-womens-waveseeker-ballet-flat/OM346,default,pd.html?cid=6N7&cgid=women-footwear-flats" rel="nofollow">http://www.crocs.com/crocs-womens-waveseeker-ballet-flat/OM346,default,pd.html?cid=6N7&cgid=women-footwear-flats</a>
Posted by mcda04[/QUOTE]

<div>Oh, thanks for the suggestions! </div>

rajahmd · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_help-he-wants-to-wear-fliip-flops?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:ed5fe55b-f5d7-4141-848f-ccf39c0e0bcePost:c50d04e4-cb50-4015-a193-a80438ed4c53">Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.</a>:
[QUOTE]Our wedding isn't fancy at all. It will be very tasteful, but I have a new job that takes 60+ hours of my time each week. I haven't had time to be a bridezilla ;) We got engaged in July and I'm just barely starting things. We haven't even gotten engagement pics! He's been very supportive, but this is the one thing he would like a say in. I'm hoping in time and with me not pushing, he'll cave. If I felt very strongly about something I did/didn't want, he would support it. Flips flops though?? ;) In Response to Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops. :
Posted by joojoobean[/QUOTE]

<div>If this is the one thing he would like a say in (quoting you), why not let him have it? Him wearing flip-flops is not going to affect your wedding in a negative way. In fact, it might make it better, because he might be more comfortable. I think you really need to find out why he feels so strongly about flip-flops before you make any decisions. And remember, it's his wedding too. Unless you're willing to let him help you pick your shoes and accessories, you really don't get that much say in what he wears on his feet. The only person that would be affected by his shoes is him, just like only your would be affected by what shoes you pick. In the grand scheme of things, shoes are not a big deal. What is a big deal is communication. So communicate with him, find out why he wants to wear flip-flops so badly, and figure out a compromise that you can both live with (ie, maybe not flip-flops but not full on dress shoes either). Good luck!</div>

HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.

Re: HELP! He wants to wear fliip flops.

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