How much is too much?

andyandhillary · July 2010

This is stupid of me but I feel like $8,000 isn't horrible. I mean if you went to Europe and could afford nice restaurants, transportation, etc I could easily see it being that much money. Maybe I'm full of it, though, as I have never been to Europe. Feel free to tell me I'm wrong.

wadingmoose · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:f84e420e-44aa-46b7-9736-785443de1cbf">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]If I could have afforded an 8 thousand dollar honeymoon, I would've gone on one. But I don't know what an HMR is. Embarrassed.
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]

Honeymoon registry.

I'd take an $8000 vacation if I could afford one, honeymoon or not. I've looked at some trips that are significantly more than that.

crfische · July 2010

Hey Moose, thanks for answering after 7 other people already berated me. I appreciate that.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:1f3e0631-6381-4bb1-aefc-a9ee31963143">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]This is stupid of me but I feel like $8,000 isn't horrible. I mean if you went to Europe and could afford nice restaurants, transportation, etc I could easily see it being that much money. Maybe I'm full of it, though, as I have never been to Europe. Feel free to tell me I'm wrong.
Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]

You're not wrong.

TheCranberry · July 2010

I wonder what will happen if no one buys them stuff off of the HMR? Will they still be able to afford the $8K honeymoon or will they go into debt to pay for it?

Maybe they are just registering for HMR stuff that are "nice to haves" but will be able to pay for the base honeymoon themselves? For instance they're paying for flight, accommodations, food, some excursions, but they're registering for things they don't necessarily need but would like to do like massage on the beach, skydiving, scuba and stuff like that. I feel like that's the only way it would work, right?

AmoroAgain · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:53e0980d-c2eb-434e-8294-d6303fd146da">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]I wonder how many bunnies her HMR is going to kill
Posted by Stackeye210[/QUOTE]

Well, she already killed one. Maybe I should make it "God kills a bunny for every dollar that goes for honeymoon registries"?

Honestly, I really think, if you can pay for it, more power to you. I don't care how much you spend. But YOU spending, does not mean "I asked everyone for cash, and planned my $8k HM before I got it." Do they get stuck with what they don't have the cash for? Yeah, it's still stupid.

AmoroAgain · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:70158a57-20ae-4d8e-bb34-8465900636e6">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]I wonder what will happen if no one buys them stuff off of the HMR? Will they still be able to afford the $8K honeymoon or will they go into debt to pay for it? Maybe they are just registering for HMR stuff that are "nice to haves" but will be able to pay for the base honeymoon themselves? For instance they're paying for flight, accommodations, food, some excursions, but they're registering for things they don't necessarily need but would like to do like massage on the beach, skydiving, scuba and stuff like that. I feel like that's the only way it would work, right?
Posted by TheCranberry[/QUOTE]
In theory it should. But most of them say that you're paying for couples massage for X amount, but when it comes down to it, they just cut the couple a blank check for them to use for whatever.

waltzingmatilda13 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:ec323bd2-7899-49d2-9849-b2934a6cb20f">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]In fairness, even though I hate HMRs, I think most sane couples use them to offset the price of the honeymoon, not to pay off the whole thing. I'm waiting almost a year after the wedding to honeymoon, and we're expecting to pay around 5K for a week at an all-inclusive resort. Some minor but nice upgrades could easily bump us up to 8K.
Posted by nhelene[/QUOTE]

Yes, but they planned a honeymoon they obviously can't afford and now expect their guests to pay for it, even some of it. You should plan what you can afford with no help and if you choose to do a HMR, then it's just icing on the cake.

wadingmoose · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:fdde1d1e-43cb-4767-bc85-6d9509898073">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]Hey Moose, thanks for answering after 7 other people already berated me. I appreciate that.
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]

Yes. Well. I was looking for cupcakes and pondering library books.

Sheesh.

You people are far too demanding.

smokeybailey · July 2010

$8000 doesn't seem like an overwhelming amount. We've got about $4500 wrapped up in airfare and hotel/apt for a 10 day trip to Munich and Paris in September. That doesn't include excursions, food, wine, souvenirs, etc.

It all depends on where you go, where you stay, how long, etc.

AmoroAgain · July 2010

Dude, there is some random hostility in this joint today.

Knittibell · July 2010

One of the few things I feel is really, really worth spending money on is traveling. Especially with people you love. Stuff is just stuff- your house could burn down and you could lose every single thing you own, but the memories and knowledge you have forever from traveling the world are priceless.

That said, I'm generally a bargain hunter when it comes to hotels, prefer to spend the money experiencing things- but I do think a HM is maybe one of those few trips you take where you buy the expensive tickets to a place you otherwise wouldn't visit, and stay somewhere a bit nicer than you would on a regular vacation.

AmoroAgain · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:83906997-fc7c-41eb-9869-4403b1d0e449">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]$8000 doesn't seem like an overwhelming amount. We've got about $4500 wrapped up in airfare and hotel/apt for a 10 day trip to Munich and Paris in September. That doesn't include excursions, food, wine, souvenirs, etc. It all depends on where you go, where you stay, how long, etc.
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]

And when. If you were coming in August, it would be that much just for the flights.

Again, if you've got it- sweet. But don't go begging your guests for it.

crfische · July 2010

Hey Moose! Did you LOSE cupcakes? Or just looking for some to MAKE?

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:70158a57-20ae-4d8e-bb34-8465900636e6">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]I wonder what will happen if no one buys them stuff off of the HMR? Will they still be able to afford the $8K honeymoon or will they go into debt to pay for it? Maybe they are just registering for HMR stuff that are "nice to haves" but will be able to pay for the base honeymoon themselves? For instance they're paying for flight, accommodations, food, some excursions, but they're registering for things they don't necessarily need but would like to do like massage on the beach, skydiving, scuba and stuff like that. I feel like that's the only way it would work, right?
Posted by TheCranberry[/QUOTE]

I REALLY think you're giving them the benefit of the doubt, here. Most people don't realize you have to pay for the vacation before you go on it, HMR or not.

PreppySailor · July 2010

Dh planned our HM as a surprise, I did not ask how much it cost, but I could make an educated guess. I think I enjoyed it more because I wasn't worrying about, "getting our money's worth"

smokeybailey · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:848d99f6-f16b-414b-8e2f-dad6f23f83b4">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How much is too much? : And when. If you were coming in August, it would be that much just for the flights. Again, if you've got it- sweet. But don't go begging your guests for it.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

You should be getting your invoice for your portion of my trip any time now.

(I bought the plane tickets in February, paid for the first half of the apt and the hotel in March, will pay the balance of the apt in August and then we have set aside a little pot o' money for spending money. Planning makes all the difference.)

FutureMrsTR · July 2010

My dream honeymoon would have started at at least $8.000. A week in Tahiti in an overwater bungalow...sigh.

ETA: But I wasn't going to ask anyone to pay for it since we couldn't afford it. Well, we could, but we weren't going to use that much of our savings.

AmoroAgain · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:41cdef77-aafd-4028-a21a-b9ab9ca6ee9b">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How much is too much? : You should be getting your invoice for your portion of my trip any time now. (I bought the plane tickets in February, paid for the first half of the apt and the hotel in March, will pay the balance of the apt in August and then we have set aside a little pot o' money for spending money. Planning makes all the difference.)
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]
Which I will post on my refrigerator as a reminder of funnier times. :D

But yes, pleanning makes all the difference. I wish i could get H to figure this out.

laurenclaire1386 · July 2010

Travel is one of those things that I don't mind spending a lot of money on. It's worth it to me to stay in really comfortable places, eat really good food while I'm there, and really get my money's worth out of the deal. FI and I are doing the HM in Key West. Airline tickets (roundtrip) and a hotel for 6 nights is running us about $3500. Which I consider reasonable for the place we're staying.

I hate HMRs period. I know some people don't have a problem with them, but I'm not one of those people. If we couldn't afford to take a HM, we would wait until we could. NBD.

wadingmoose · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:c59d5ccc-3053-4937-ab2d-ddaa8e3b196a">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]Hey Moose! Did you LOSE cupcakes? Or just looking for some to MAKE?
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]

Was hoping to find some to eat. But now I've had lunch (mmmmmm mini wheats) so maybe I'll start making sense again soon. Although, don't hold your breath. Mini wheats for lunch doesn't make a lot of sense.

crfische · July 2010

I always called them mini hay bales. I couldn't ever get myself to eat them.

catemeg · July 2010

I wouldn't judge anyone for taking an expensive honeymoon, but I do believe spending other people's money on a frivolous week of indulgence is not very polite. Whatever your opinion on HMR, I can't imagine someone's friends and family would want the couple using their hard earned money to enjoy a vacation that the giftgivers would never be able to afford for themselves. If I went on a very expensive honeymoon, every penny would be ours. I think the point of a HMR is for extras, like a special dinner or massage or upgraded suite, that guests can give the couple; not to finance the whole trip!

We did a 5 day trip to Costa Rica and spent close to $4,000 and that was just a normal vacation. We're taking a 9 day trip to Europe and spending probably around $5,000 total. I imagine our honeymoon will be quite expensive, but we'll pay for it ourselves, just like each of our other trips.

AmoroAgain · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:a9e44c38-3355-4158-8631-ccff080af6ae">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE] I hate HMRs period. I know some people don't have a problem with them, but I'm not one of those people. If we couldn't afford to take a HM, we would wait until we could. NBD.
Posted by laurenclaire1386[/QUOTE]
METOO

andy71781 · July 2010

Ok (1) what is up with the cupcakes?

(2) We are probably spending about that much on our honeymoon and we got $6,000 from my FIL but I would not have planned it hoping to get money from an HMR. I almost threw away my duvet assuming that I'd get it from my registry - I learned my lesson quickly.

That girl should just put it all on a credit card and pay it off over the year. You only have one honeymoon! RIGHT?!?!?

aprovencher21 · July 2010

I don't think $8,000 is excessive to spend on a honeymoon. I cannot stand HMR to begin with but one for $8,000 is beyond me. Why can't people take the trip they can afford.

Lilou902 · July 2010

If it's what you want and can afford, then do it. Our HM will probably cost close to 10k. We are going all out. It's what we really want and we probably won't be taking another big vacation for a few years, since we want to have kids and purchase a bigger house down the line, so we know scrimping will be in our future!

I don't have a HMR, but I wouldn't plan the HM if I didn't have the means to pay for it.

alixzafiris · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:1f3e0631-6381-4bb1-aefc-a9ee31963143">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]This is stupid of me but I feel like $8,000 isn't horrible. I mean if you went to Europe and could afford nice restaurants, transportation, etc I could easily see it being that much money. Maybe I'm full of it, though, as I have never been to Europe. Feel free to tell me I'm wrong.
Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]

I'm with you entirely. I mean, we're heading to South Africa in November and the flights alone were five grand so it doesn't seem like a hugely steep amount to me; international travel isn't cheap. I think it just depends on priorities. I love to travel and I'll save up what some might think are exorbitant amounts of money to support my love for it.

And quite frankly *gasp* I don't care either way about HMR's. I didn't do one, nor did I consider it, but I don't judge those who do. Some people are all about kitchen utensils and small appliances, some are about travel.

TheCranberry · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_much-much-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5aa8867c-0dfa-4244-9370-ebc9dcb7baebPost:0d5d7e87-b60c-4f4c-bc8f-3593ccb074ed">Re: How much is too much?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How much is too much? : In theory it should. But most of them say that you're paying for couples massage for X amount, but when it comes down to it, they just cut the couple a blank check for them to use for whatever.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

I didn't know that's how it worked. I've gotten someone a gift from one once (I don't remember what the item was), and I did wonder how they would get the money for that specific massage (or whatever it was). The check thing makes sense though.

andyandhillary · July 2010

I actually don't mind HMRs either, Alix. I personally see it exactly the same as buying a gift off of a registry to giving a person cash.

How much is too much?

Re: How much is too much?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards