children at wedding

FloridaMichelle · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_children-at-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:60d1d76d-912f-4f4a-af63-d0cc83de65c3Post:aca57ec1-cfce-437f-9919-6e615fa98c1b">Re: children at wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: children at wedding : Was this all kids? Every little boy and girl sat down with their hands folded on their sunday best and never made a peep? There have been rotten parents in every generation and each generation idolizes itself. I'm not saying you or your family misbehaved, but there were kids your age that did. Sure, bad behavior publicized more and I've seen kids get away with a lot, but it also has to do with what's "promoted" in society. It's hard to find stories of kids behaving when all we hear about are kids misbehaving. I do think that kids have been given into a whole lot- there are more parents trying to appease their children than have their child do whats right, but it's only a marginal increase that I think is also due to fewer children in each family (1-2 instead of 5-6). Many children do behave well, but parents don't say "Suzie behaved so well at Mary's wedding! She ate all her supper and never hid under any table once!" They say "Tommy was such a terror at Mary's wedding! He stuck his peas in the candles and was grabbing cousin Tillies shoes off her feet under the tablecloth!" And now, with social media and youtube and the internets, that bad behavior news travels at lightening speed. <strong>I think the whole "take a video of Tommy being a brat" reinfoces that behavior on kids- they want attention and know they'll get it if they misbehave</strong>. Now, that said, I still think that kids who are well behaved outnumber the bad apples
Posted by sydaries[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>completely agree with that sentence

</div>

MrsGandthebeag · December 2012

Just have an adult only wedding. That's what we did. Neither my h or I are crazy about kids and didn't want any at our wedding. IT's fine.

ScrabbleAndLlamas · December 2012

I've coordinated babysitters for weddings. Parents really do take advantage of it! I'm a teacher. I cannot have kids at my wedding because I change into my teacher self around kids, and I don't want to be that at my wedding. Everyone has been pretty understanding.

melb2013 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_children-at-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:60d1d76d-912f-4f4a-af63-d0cc83de65c3Post:29ae332a-8e98-40b7-bd2c-69e04a99d876">Re: children at wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: children at wedding : We had kids at our wedding, and we had a kid's meal option. At our venue it was half the price of an adult meal, and the kids were able to get whatever they wanted. Hamburger and broccoli? Done. Chicken fingers and mashed potatoes? Done.<strong> All the kids were well behaved, and cute, not disruptive on the dance floor. In fact, they were better behaved than some of the adults.</strong>
Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]
<div>
</div><div>That's always been my experience with kids at weddings. Kids don't get drunk and rowdy! Lol! </div>

lily_721 · December 2012

I had 12 children ranging from 6 months to 10 years old. I had the bridal room set up for the kids: pillows, blankets, TV with DVR and attached bathroom. Parents brought the strollers into the room for the babies. I offered sitters; the parents all declined. One family brought their nanny.

I also had a crafts, games, crayons, and kid-friendly drinks/food on the children's table. My wedding planner used foam letters for placecards for the children. I had wrapped gifts for each of the children at their seats. The tables was draped in several layers of white craft paper. I had dollar store tiaras and masks for the kids. They loved it. They had such a great time. Some of my favorite pictures and memories were of the happiness of the children.

The kids were great. They are all cousins so it was helpful that they all knew each other. One little girl is a step-cousin so she really doesn't know the others and a little shy. She had such an amazing time. Her smile and laughter were the best.

It probably cost me $50 to add the "special effects" for the children. It was well worth it.

We didn't have any problems with the children. All were amazingly well behaved. We had an open bar and the parents had a great time. We also provided all transportation with a trolley.

Jen4948 · December 2012

You can have an adult-only wedding; you can also arrange for babysitting and/or a separate room for children of guests.

But, if you don't invite the children, some parents may choose to decline the invitation because they refuse to leave them with someone else. And even if you do and offer babysitting, some parents may refuse to leave them with the sitter. So I think that anyone who tries for an adult-only wedding runs the risk that there might be children there anyway. It's incredibly rude of parents to bring uninvited children to a wedding, but there doesn't seem to be any good way to deal with it other than sucking it up and letting the children be there.

I actually like lily_721's suggestions and would like to use some of them at my own wedding. There are many children in my family and I love them all, but at the same time I'd prefer to limit their involvement for a number of reasons. But I'm not sure how well it would go down with my relatives.

lily_721 · December 2012

Another note: I went against my MIL's wishes that the children sit with their parents. I surrounded the children's table with their parents. Every child was within arm's length of their parent. I also had this table pushed closest to the wall so the younger ones would not be near any flow of traffic.

Kids loved that they had their "own table." My less-than-well-behaved 4 y/o niece did very well because she wanted to sit with her older cousins and not be in the corner with the babies. Parents loved it and were able to enjoy their selves while still being able to watch over their children.

jenferian · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_children-at-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:60d1d76d-912f-4f4a-af63-d0cc83de65c3Post:ba45f59b-d877-4f2f-8c38-699a0eab7710">Re: children at wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]I find it interesting that you want the kids at the serious, important part of the day - the wedding. This is where kids can really interrupt things. But you don't want them at the loud, fun part of the day where they can run around on the dance floor and not bother anyone.
Posted by scribe95[/QUOTE]

Personally, I'd be more OK with kids at the ceremony than the wedding, and it's for the same reason I don't want kids at adult-themed parties or anywhere adults are going to be drinking a lot. Kids and alcohol do not mix, in my opinion. Kids are a buzzkill at parties; if there are kids around, I'm going to monitor my consumption and behavior a lot more than I would around adults.

At a ceremony, you don't run this risk.

Also, kids get bored easily. How fun can a 5-hour wedding reception be for a 10-year-old boy?

Personally, I'm not inviting children. Our brothers have 8 children between them (our nieces and nephews) and we--parents included--are all totally OK with that.

children at wedding

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