Forget firing BMs, Can I strangle the groom?

mags0607 · March 2010

So, I am finishing up the addresses for the Save the Dates. Ricky has some friends and coworkers that I don't know, and therefore don't have their addresses or conact info.

I tell him this, and list off who he needs to find addresses for. He starts playing on his phone so I assume that he is texting his friends.

Then, I check my facebook for an address I forgot to write down.
The following is his facebook status.

Ricky : needs you to send me your address so I can decide whether or not I want to invite you to my wedding.

I am tyring to take deep breaths not to strangle him. Its been unposted now, but in say 10 minutes it was up 6 people sent him their address, 2 of whom I was not planning to invite.

I'm just going to add them, but seriously, Who thinks this is a good idea????

jenn.daniel · March 2010

This is the classic male problem of not thinking before speaking, or in this case, typing. Maybe it's good my FI doesn't have facebook...

mags0607 · March 2010

Yes, that was definitely not the smartest thing. He is just not getting the etiquette part of the wedding / invitation thing... and also doesn't know why we can't put nicknames on the envelopes.

jennyp08 · March 2010

hahahhahaha sorry, I know you're frustrated, but I was grinning through your whole post. Thanks to my FI the receptionist at our dentists office is expecting an invite to our otherwise small close-knit wedding. lol It will be us, our 50 closest friends and family...and the secretary from our dentists office. lol

Some guys just don't get wedding guest list etiquette. lol

LarissaAnn · March 2010

I read this out loud to H because I was laughing & he gave me a quizzical look, and he's now hysterical laughing, saying, "I love it! That's something I'd do!"

He's not kidding either. He's done FB status for our parties that were not open shindigs.

cukimerrydoll · March 2010

Wow... for those I would have done a PM on FB... but I can see the slip up.

For the most part, FB is fairly wedding-free... though my sister/MOH did friend the entire WP for better planning... and my FFIL. I think it's brilliant.

suz62984 · March 2010

haha-your title is funny mags. Don't add them unless you really want to. They'll forget about the status by the time you send out invites. That's just the way guys handle things. Could you imagine if we left all the wedding planning up to them???

On a related FB note, my FI recently cleaned up is friend list. He posted "Cleaning up the friend list. Check back to see if you've been defriended." After cleaning up the list he posted a message for the people left to see. I was getting FB messages on my wall and email saying that my FI was a jerk to defriend them. ha

CTGirl30 · March 2010

Too funny - I love how he asked for addresses and then also added he was deciding whether or not to actually invite them to the wedding.

lizstill13 · March 2010

Oh no, it's not just a guy thing. A girl I was really close with in high school posted pretty much every last detail about her wedding on FB for her DW! I'm talking dates, location (St. Lucia), exact resort they are staying at, how much it costs to stay there, what day they are getting married. She actually posted once about "all those people who will be invited to my wedding, here's the details..." (wha?)

It boggles the mind.

britne28 · March 2010

Oh dear.

My FI got frustrated when I explained to him that if we are inviting people but not their children then we have to make it out to Mr & Mrs Smith, not the smith family. I said otherwise we'll be getting people booking flights for their kids. And this was just for the save the dates.

stefani103 · March 2010

haha I read this to FI and he was shocked. While I've been a bigger stickler for the etiquette, he's been good about keeping the guest list reasonable. However, that's also because we're paying and more people = more money. Such the business man

)

mags0607 · March 2010

I like FB for omming people to get lots of addresses, but FI thinks its funny to post random stuff and be a jokester.

We are keeping the people that gave him addresses, they aren't random FB friends, and in all honesty I kinda forgot about them, and would like to invite them. I will never admit that to him though. : )

Suz- at least he didn't post a notice that he was defreinding people, although I think that's kinda funny.

kwrobertson · March 2010

atleast he did something to get the addresses. I gave FI 11 months to get his friends addresses and in the end, i had to message their wives to get their info.

men have no clue about etiquette and most don't have any desire to ever expand on their knowledge. and when reading it, i got a good laugh. just think: before that wedding, theres a lot more time for even dumber stuff to happen - good stories!!!!

lindseroo · March 2010

LOL this is pretty unrelated, but shows the general wedding knowledge of males. FI and I are invited to a wedding March 20, for which the RSVP is due tomorrow. (Don't know why they're doing it so late, we didn't even get the invite until last week! Stressful!!) Anyway, he is having surgery a few days before, so we *most likely* won't be able to attend. His suggestion? TEXT his friend and tell him not to count on us being there. Explain he is having surgery and that he may feel well enough, but to count us out and if we show up, we show up. OMG! I was horrified that he thought this would be acceptable on several levels! LOL I told him we would RSVP YES, but explain (on the included RSVP card, of course) that we may not be there due to his surgery. Boys.

themidge · March 2010

don't add people just because they sent a facebook message. it was stupid of those people anyway, i'm sure not all 6 of them are named "ricky".

lharri12 · March 2010

Actually, with the new facebook settings, he could have chosen select friends to see his status update (worded differently of course) instead of sending it to his entire list of fb friends.

cwshreve · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_forget-firing-bms-can-strangle-groom?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0e3ac0cb-c8bd-4706-9a9f-4a0e0e8a076cPost:504a844b-c85c-44f6-9908-1d85afadae00">Re: Forget firing BMs, Can I strangle the groom?</a>:
[QUOTE]atleast he did something to get the addresses. I gave FI 11 months to get his friends addresses and in the end, i had to message their wives to get their info. men have no clue about etiquette and most don't have any desire to ever expand on their knowledge. and when reading it, i got a good laugh. just think: before that wedding, theres a lot more time for even dumber stuff to happen - good stories!!!! :)
Posted by kwrobertson[/QUOTE]

HAHAHA! The same exact thing happened to me, I may as well have given him 30 minutes to get all the addresses for the amount of effort he wound up putting into it. He is clueless.

Thank goodness the wedding is about a month away because everytime he went out and had beers he would come home and tell me who else is coming to our wedding! This thread has totally made my day, I have the giggles!

sjnsjnsjn · March 2010

Definitely a basis for strangulation. And for reconsidering whether he's smart enough to marry. Deep breaths. Maybe talk a walk around the block. UGH! Sorry!

1coco676 · March 2010

Hahaha. Had to read this message board because I am reaching that point with my groom. Isn't it frustrating when they think they are "helping"? Good luck

mritaray · March 2010

Now I dont feel bad for just looking in his blackberry for his peoples numbers then calling the wives / F's for info.

caiter4 · March 2010

You're lucky, my FI thinks it's funny to say "I don't have to do anything, the wedding plans itself" when I ask him to help. I asked him to make our wedding website because he's a techie, and I ended up having to pick the design.

Forget firing BMs, Can I strangle the groom?

Re: Forget firing BMs, Can I strangle the groom?

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