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Wedding Etiquette Forum
Favor Question for a ceremony only wedding
We are getting married on the beach next summer, with only a ceremony. We are going on a combined family vacation, staying for the week in Myrtle Beach and only family will be at our wedding ceremony, which we are fully paying for.
Since it's a "joint' vacation, although still a destination wedding, what would the favors be?
Since it's a "joint' vacation, although still a destination wedding, what would the favors be?
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Re: Favor Question for a ceremony only wedding
[QUOTE]We are getting married on the beach next summer, with only a ceremony. We are going on a combined family vacation, staying for the week in Myrtle Beach and only family will be at our wedding ceremony, which we are fully paying for. Since it's a "joint' vacation, although still a destination wedding, what would the favors be?
Posted by melliott09[/QUOTE]
A ceremony only wedding is rude. A wedding reception is a thank-you to your guests for coming. It's even ruder to have a destination wedding, which means people will be traveling/flying, and not at least have a small reception.
It doesn't have to be fancy; but you should at least host a beach BBQ with food and drink after the ceremony.
Favors are not necessary.
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"You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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And I'll gladly stay for a week in Myrtle Beach having never been there, and our children love the beach/ocean. Anything is a change from the Jersey Shores!
So are you going to cover everyone's dinner or not?
I guess I was more or less looking to see if it's proper to give favors, but I'm thinking now since it's family only (and this is my 2nd marriage, his 1st) I think I will do engraved picture frames or such after we get our pictures back for both sets of parents as a favor.
[QUOTE]It is not your father's decision. If you want to treat your wedding guests to dinner, do it.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]
Depends on her dad...if he's like mine she can try all she wants to treat everyone to dinner afterwards but he'll still pay. I can't even take my dad to lunch and pay. He replaces my card with his when the bill comes. A way around that would be to tell the waiter to give you the bill and not let your dad get a hold of it.
I agree that you should host a little something after the ceremony. Favors are not necessary and no one will miss them.
[QUOTE]We would be going out to eat after due to the ceremonies timing, and we had planned the family vacation prior to me telling everyone that we would get married down there since all our family would be there. So no one is out of any expenses, since they were going to be there anyway. And I'll gladly stay for a week in Myrtle Beach having never been there, and our children love the beach/ocean. Anything is a change from the Jersey Shores!
Posted by melliott09[/QUOTE]
<div>I still think you should thank them for giving up a vacation day (hours) to witness your wedding. Who is paying for the dinner? For their drinks?</div><div>
</div><div>EDIT: I answered a phone call while working on this response so I missed a couple of the responses before this one. I think she should at least make the effort to pay for dinner.. but if the dad wants to .. I wouldn't consider it rude to let him. Just as long as the bill isn't being split up for each guest to pay their own. Also.. you can always buy a bottle of champaign for toasting purposes or something "extra" like that.</div>
As for the frames, that'd just be parent gifts, you don't have to call them favors.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Favor Question for a ceremony only wedding : Depends on her dad...if he's like mine she can try all she wants to treat everyone to dinner afterwards but he'll still pay. I can't even take my dad to lunch and pay. He replaces my card with his when the bill comes. A way around that would be to tell the waiter to give you the bill and not let your dad get a hold of it. I agree that you should host a little something after the ceremony. Favors are not necessary and no one will miss them.
Posted by stacy&tige[/QUOTE]
I get this, but I think a little more planning might want to go into this wedding dinner - like booking a room with the restaurant for x number of people and possibly setting a menu and drink list. It would make it easier ont he restaurant. They can probably also take her credit card info at that time.
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[QUOTE]Thanks for all the responses, <strong>even the ones that were pretty rude and didn't display proper etiquette.</strong> I do have plenty of time to plan the dinner and I'm sure I can find a way to thank my family for attending our ceremony.
Posted by melliott09[/QUOTE]
Just to save you the headache of finding this out the hard way, "etiquette" is supposed to make up the content of this board, but not its manner of communication. People here are very blunt, and that has absolutely nothing to do with wedding etiquette.
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"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
[QUOTE]I understand what the intent of this forum is; I was pointing out the rudeness, that's all.
Posted by melliott09[/QUOTE]
Right, it's just that many a newb comes to this board and eventually says something like, "for a wedding etiquette board, you guys aren't polite at all/are rude/don't practice very good etiquette amongst yourselves!" Which is kind of missing the point, you know? YOU'RE supposed to demonstrate appropriate etiquette to your guests. WE'RE not required to demonstrate any kind of etiquette with you. Does that make more sense? ;)
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
She's going to be on vacation with her family. While they're there, her and her FI and going to get married real quick on the beach. This isn't a typical wedding with invitations and flowers and a wedding party and such. Yeah they can all go out to dinner afterward and celebrate but I don't think that means she's obligated to plan a menu and decorate and get a private room and all that jazz. Sure, pick up the tab if you can but if your Dad offers, let him. Not everything has to be a big wedding deal.
And I was thinking about how even if we did favors, we are all on vacation for the rest of the week, I would bet most of the favors wouldn't even make it back to Jersey in one piece :-)