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Bring forward the wedding for money?

mrosewmrosew
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in Students
So, some context; my fiance is an undergraduate at a private uni in London, and I'm currently studying for my a-levels at my home in Bristol, a city about 2 hours out of London. Next summer, I was going to move up to be with him and apply for uni while I'm there, with a mind to start my BA in Fall 2014. We were then going to wait until I finish uni in 2017 to get married, so he will have been working for a while and we'll have the money to do it properly.

The thing is, he recently found out he won't recieve any bursary money , because his family's income has increased dramatically, so he is straight-up broke. 

While doing research online we realised that if a student is married, under student finance regulations you count as an independent household. This means that he would be eligible for a £10,000 a year maintenance grant on top of the scholarship he has for his fees, and if I went to the same uni as him it would be the same for me. Even if I went to a state uni, I would get a £5000 a year maintenance grant.

So, now we are thinking of getting married next summer, so we don't have to depend on working 20 hours a week forever/parents bailing us out. 

Is this a terrible decision? Is it too soon? should we live together first? Are we thinking too short-term?
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Re: Bring forward the wedding for money?

  • ravenrayravenray member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary Combo Breaker

    Working 20 hours isn't that bad, honestly. But since you guys are already engaged I feel like it is a little different than if you were just going to get married for the money.  

     

    Have you looked at everything? How much rent, food, car insurance (if you have one), medical insurance, ect will cost?  Does the school loans cover that? If not, you’d have to work anyways.  Our school loans didn't cover the cost of living so we had to take out a loan, it wasn't the end of the world but we still had to, or find a job.  What about after you graduate? There is no guarantee that you will get a job right away, so what will you do?  It might be better to wait and save. 

     

    I didn't live with my H before we got married and there were some huge growing pains to work out.  So just be aware of that and I would recommend getting married early in the summer so you have some time to adjust before you start school (which can be a whole other problem) if you decide to do that.  

    "Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained"-C.S. Lewis

    Married! May 27th, 2012

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  • mrosewmrosew
    First Comment
    More details: we are both financially independent (I live with my parents, but I've been paying rent since I was 16) and already working, but it'd be really good for our acedemic performance if we didn't absolutely HAVE to work for a significant amount of time per week. The loans would almost cover all our rent, bills, general living costs, so we'd essentially just be working for savings and luxuries, like eating out and new clothes. The ability to save would be probably the biggest thing for us; as ravenray said, we arent guaranteed stable employment straight out of college, so having a few thousand put away as a safety net would be great.

    We're in the UK, so student loans are pretty much the only option for us :)
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  • fizzylemonadefizzylemonade member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    mrose are you y12 or y13? Will you finish your A-levels this summer then get married and move to London with him? What will you do during your gap year if you're married? If you're not married? Have you thought about applying to uni this year instead? The regular deadline is usually Jan 15th-ish though your school may have earlier deadlines so they can put your reference on. And even if you miss that  many unis have places all the way through clearing - though that depends on your courses.

    Sit down with your fiance and look at the numbers. Look at what maintainance grants you might get, then what student loans for living you're entitled to. Then look at how much you're going to spend on rent, Oyster card, food, etc. From what I remember they look at the last tax year's income - so 2011/2012 for a September 2013 loan. A major change in circumstances (like getting married) might cause them to look at the recent year though. 

    And as a Brit with the great state student loan system, don't worry so much about the repayment. Until you're working, earning over the set amount (I think for mine it's £15000, but I read somewhere that the number was increasing), they're not going to ask for repayment. Then it just goes out through PAYE anyway and it isn't going to be a major amount. Do not take private loans out at all - then it's a totally different situation. 
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  • mrosewmrosew
    First Comment
    @fizzylemonade - My A-level situation, as a private candidate who has officially dropped out of school, is a little complex. I'm doing AS and A2's all at once for two subjects, doing my A2's for one subject over the summer, and possibly picking up other AS-levels next year. At the beginning of my year, I worked out this timetable was the best thing for my academic progress, so I don't want to sacrifice that for financial reasons. I'm also not interested in doing anything but working and internships next year (technically my gap year, though I will still be studying). This wouldn't be any different if I was married; I had a bit of a mini gap year this summer, travelling in Europe and India, and travel did not agree with me!

    Oh, and a private loan is not a thing I'm considering. The thought of them scare the crap out of me!

    Me and me fiance have decided this would actually be a great option, but getting married next year is pretty much off the table because of family objections. Neither of our families are best pleased about us getting married so young, so we've decided to give it another year. 
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  • fizzylemonadefizzylemonade member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    Laurelrenee - The UK and US education systems are definitely apples to oranges. The student loan system is also significantly different. Tuition fees are regulated, and you can take a student loan out for the fees, then another for your living expenses. The amount you can take out for your living expenses is means-tested and depends on where you're studying.

    mrosew - Delaying a year is a good decision, particularly if your families have some concerns. It will give you time to live together and go through some life-changes together, which should help you get to know each other in different ways too. And I'd disagree that you dropped out as long as you got your GCSEs! Have you looked if you're eligible for the EMA while you're still taking A-levels? Working and internships are a great idea while you're applying for uni.
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  • mrosewmrosew
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_students_bring-forward-the-wedding-for-money?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:684Discussion:35a57ec5-bf0a-4750-b6fb-ed605353d576Post:62eef7ae-59d4-44e9-8389-9471609e4eff">Re: Bring forward the wedding for money?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Laurelrenee - The UK and US education systems are definitely apples to oranges. The student loan system is also significantly different. Tuition fees are regulated, and you can take a student loan out for the fees, then another for your living expenses. The amount you can take out for your living expenses is means-tested and depends on where you're studying. mrosew - Delaying a year is a good decision, particularly if your families have some concerns. It will give you time to live together and go through some life-changes together, which should help you get to know each other in different ways too. And I'd disagree that you dropped out as long as you got your GCSEs! Have you looked if you're eligible for the EMA while you're still taking A-levels? Working and internships are a great idea while you're applying for uni.
    Posted by fizzylemonade[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Yeh, monetary gain isn't worth upsetting our families over :) </div><div>
    </div><div>EMA's don't exist anymore, and their replacement must be applied for through colleges. It sucks, because that little bit of money would help so much (an hour's tutoring!) but ah well :)

    </div>
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  • tiny specktiny speck member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    Sounds like you've decided to wait on marriage for a while. I think that's a smart plan, as you are both still young. There's nothing wrong with a long engagement.
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  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    No, it's not a terrible decision.  My FI and I joke all the time about how getting married is just an economical decision and we're only getting married to save money.  lol

    Since you are already engaged, I think it's fine to bump up the date. 

    Also, living together is not a requirement before getting married.  I know lots of people (I would venture to say most of the married people I know) who have happy marriages who did not live together first including my parents who have been married for 25 years and several good close friends in my generation who have been married for 2 - 7 years and going strong!  My FI and I have not lived together.

    I'd say just weigh the pros and cons and then decide.
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