Wedding Ceremony & Reception Music Discussions

Terrified of Dancing at my Wedding!

Can anybody help me with this problem?  I am terrified of dancing in front of people - and for some reason, most of all my fiancee!  If there is even the hint of dancing (ie - music starts playing, someone asks me to dance, my friends go out onto the dance floor, etc.) I literally break out in a sweat, feel nauseous, and freeze up. So, needless to say, the thought of dancing at my wedding - with a year's worth of buildup! - in front of 150 people is absolutely terrifying to me!!  I don't know if there is a dance phobia but, if there is, I have it.  My fiancee says he doesn't care if I can't dance (I can - I dance when I am alone!), he just wants to share the moments with me and thinks it would be romantic to dance with each other (in 8 years, we've never danced anything other than the occasional slow dance).  
HOW DO I GET OVER THIS?!?!

Re: Terrified of Dancing at my Wedding!

  • SD3194SD3194 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I can see how you would be nervous. It's a little uneasy having 150 people staring at you dance. This may be awful advice but maybe you should have a few drinks before your dance. I'm sure you'll still be nervous but at least it will take the edge off. I always had a fear of dancing in highschool (I didn't even dance at my prom) but when I turned 21 and started drinking at clubs I was a dancing fool lol. Not saying you should be a drunken crazy lady, just a little loose.

    You could always practice dancing with your FI before the wedding. if you make dancing a little more familiar and know what to expect it could help out a ton.
  • edited December 2011
    Not everyone is going to be watching you for every dance. People are going to be at the bar, talking, outside having a smoke, etc. Dance lessons are always an option. You don't have to go the choreographed route, but just take lessons so you are more comfortable. H and I thought about doing that, bc I tend to have really stiff legs when we dance, but we ran out of time. Needless to say, everything was just fine on our wedding day.
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you really don't want to do this, then just have your dance start, and after 30 seconds, have your DJ ask everyone to join you on the dance floor to help you celebrate. 

    And for those 30 seconds that you will be alone on the floor:  look into your new DH's eyes, and focus on him and the fact that you're married.  =)
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • edited December 2011
    Just wondering if you think you're a bad dancer? Maybe you and FI could take dance lessons and then maybe some lessons in a class so you would get used to having other people see you dance.
  • stephasuasustephasuasu member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am a horrible dancer. and boy does it show in the pictures after dinner. Oh well! it was fun and I hope you find a way to have fun with it. Dance lessons will really help you out :)
  • edited December 2011

    I'm terrified of dancing in front of people, and FI says he feels stupid, so we're just not having dancing.  None of our parents were dying to have it, and most of our friends and family didn't have it at their weddings.  We'll still have music, though.

  • Robyn5298Robyn5298 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Yes, DANCE LESSONS!  I'm like you - I can dance, but I get nervous dancing around other people.  Its a self-conscious thing which is strange, because I'm a pretty outgoing and friendly person in general. 

    Anyway - my husband and I took 3 quick 30 minute private lessons from our local Arthur Murray and it took so much of the pressure off!  We didn't do a choreographed thing, we just learned how to foxtrot and do turns correctly.  People were so impressed and it felt good to get up there and not have to worry about looking silly. 

    Just pick your song (maybe choose a short one) and bring it to your lessons.  I bet you'll start to feel better about the dance once you start practicing!
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  • edited December 2011
    We aren't having dancing at our wedding..... Nothing is worth a years worth of anxiety!!!!  If you are that anxious about it, you won't truly enjoy your day... so I say skip it all together!  Either way...good luck!
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