Opinion please!

Re: Opinion please!

• divinemsbee member

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  I think that sounds good. I know that Easter Vigil Mass (that's when they baptise the RCIA people in most churches I've been to) is always just soooooo looooong. I think if you can do it early, more power to you.
  From what I've heard ( I'm the Catholic with the non-Catholic FI) is that if he were to be baptised Catholic then it would make our marriage the sacrament. Meaning we could do the whole full Mass communion bit, whereas if he isn't, we could only have the Liturgy of the Word.
  I think having your FILs as your godparents is a really great thing, if you're close to them.

  

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• amh04

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  See the first priest we spoke with said it would just be a ceremony because I'm not Catholic. So.. I think our priest is kind of pushing for my to get baptized. He told us today it would be a 3 hour ordeal!!! Oh my word!!! So fingers and toes are crossed we can do it before the wedding, just because I know it would be nice and mean a lot to us both.
  Once your FI becomes catholic (if he wants to) then your marriage would be considered a full Sacrament once he is baptized/confirmed. It's like retroactive? lol At least thats what I was told.
  
  I'm not really close with them persay, but I don't hate them. They're really nice people honestly. And honestly, I think they would be the only people to ask. I just don't know how weird that would be to have my IL's as my godparents??

  

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• Irishcurls member

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  It varies by parish if priests will allow a full Mass in a mixed marriage; mine did not but we also didn't push the issue since it wasn't a huge deal to me. I personally am not caught up in semantics of Sacrament, not-Sacrament. The Rite of Marriage is a sacrament to me as a Catholic. In my opinon, it's not weird at all to have them as your godparents--and if you don't have any other Catholics to ask, I'm not sure what else you could do. I'm sure they would love it, right??

  

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• amh04

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_opinion-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:9024a550-6df1-4800-b9eb-c0b469731488Post:bc55e1d0-73ea-450f-99c5-1838cf566ce5">Re: Opinion please!</a>:
  [QUOTE]It varies by parish if priests will allow a full Mass in a mixed marriage; mine did not but we also didn't push the issue since it wasn't a huge deal to me. I personally am not caught up in semantics of Sacrament, not-Sacrament. The Rite of Marriage is a sacrament to me as a Catholic. <strong>In my opinon, it's not weird at all to have them as your godparents--and if you don't have any other Catholics to ask, I'm not sure what else you could do. I'm sure they would love it, right??
  </strong>Posted by Irishcurls[/QUOTE]
  
  I think my FMIL really would, FFIL I think would too. Ill know for sure Tuesday after class - or at least have a better judgement of whether or not they would allow it. If I do, I'd really like to ask her in person when we go to visit for thanksgiving, maybe on a Saturday or Sunday morning before we leave. When things aren't so crazy. I just wanted to get some unbiased feedback. FI can say it's fine all day long, but he of course won't think it's weird. 
  
  Thanks ladies!  

  

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• Irishcurls member

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  Haha yeah, we'll be honest if nothing else No but honestly, I'm not trying to downplay it, but it's not a huuuge deal past the actual Baptism, kwim? So if you're ok with it, I would say go for it for sure!!

  

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• Irishcurls member

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  Oh and this is realllllly minor, but I'm wondering why your priest said the wedding Mass would fulfil the Sunday obligation? Because it technically won't; it has to be after 4pm and I've never heard of a Catholic wedding ceremony that late on a Saturday, because the vigil Mass is usually going on. Just wondering, you might have no idea!

  

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• amh04

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_opinion-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:9024a550-6df1-4800-b9eb-c0b469731488Post:40b96896-9a64-4fcf-9f0c-80133876203a">Re: Opinion please!</a>:
  [QUOTE]Oh and this is realllllly minor, but I'm wondering why your priest said the wedding Mass would fulfil the Sunday obligation? Because it technically won't; it has to be after 4pm and I've never heard of a Catholic wedding ceremony that late on a Saturday, because the vigil Mass is usually going on. Just wondering, you might have no idea! :)
  Posted by Irishcurls[/QUOTE]
  
  Our ceremony is at 5:00 pm. So it fulfills Sundays obligation. :)
  
  And thanks, I guess your right - it really isn't a big deal afterwards, and it has the upsides of making FMIL pretty happy. So win win :)

  

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• prettyirishgirl member

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

   You can only have mass if your priest allows it if your FI or you aren't Christian and baptized, but if youa ren't both catholic i think it is up to the priest's discretion.
  
  catholic marrying baptized Christian counts as a sacrament. If one is un-baptized is it a natural marriage and the priest is the same as a judge in a JOP in that situation. ** but if at any point you become baptized it automatically becomes a sacrament (go god)**
  
  If you aren't both catholic/Christian baptized you need permission from a bishop to be married in a church. It wont be odd if one of you gets the sacrament and the other and doesn't look weird because it works like a normal mass and as he received the sacrament you would in turn be blessed. Neither of you would have to reach for the communion, because you can take it without touching it. So you would look exactly the same from the back (you woudl also look rediculously similar even if he reaches for it). The only people who would see the difference would be you two and the priest.
  
  and yay! for a private one the others are sooo long i avoide them - that is probably bad but i'll do jsut abotu everything to go to a different mass then the communion, baptisms, and confirmations.

  
  My "Wedding" Blog

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• Irishcurls member

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_opinion-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:13Discussion:9024a550-6df1-4800-b9eb-c0b469731488Post:ff667523-952b-448e-a63d-c8d57fcde08d">Re: Opinion please!</a>:
  [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinion please! : Our ceremony is at 5:00 pm. So it fulfills Sundays obligation. :) And thanks, I guess your right - it really isn't a big deal afterwards, and it has the upsides of making FMIL pretty happy. So win win :)
  Posted by amh04[/QUOTE]
  Lucky!!!! :) 

  

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• amh04

  

  November 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_opinion-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:9024a550-6df1-4800-b9eb-c0b469731488Post:eb27ba4b-e354-4ad3-8f55-aef1954f21d1">Re: Opinion please!</a>:
  [QUOTE] You can only have mass if your priest allows it if your FI or you aren't Christian and baptized, but if youa ren't both catholic i think it is up to the priest's discretion. catholic marrying baptized Christian counts as a sacrament. If one is un-baptized is it a natural marriage and the priest is the same as a judge in a JOP in that situation. ** but if at any point you become baptized it automatically becomes a sacrament (go god)** If you aren't both catholic/Christian baptized you need permission from a bishop to be married in a church. It wont be odd if one of you gets the sacrament and the other and doesn't look weird because it works like a normal mass and as he received the sacrament you would in turn be blessed. Neither of you would have to reach for the communion, because you can take it without touching it. So you would look exactly the same from the back (you woudl also look rediculously similar even if he reaches for it). The only people who would see the difference would be you two and the priest. and yay! for a private one the others are sooo long i avoide them - that is probably bad but i'll do jsut abotu everything to go to a different mass then the communion, baptisms, and confirmations.
  Posted by prettyirishgirl[/QUOTE]
  
  
  My FI is catholic, born and raised, and I'm going through RCIA now - I've never been baptized. I think the reason why I didn't want it and was so against it is to us it was very disunifying. No one but my Aunt is Catholic on my side of the family and everyone on FI's side is Catholic. But our priest is more on the liberal up to date side and is super nice about it. Except for this portion, he isn't budging on. But fingers crossed I can be baptized/confirmed/first communion prior to the wedding. 
  In some Catholic wedding's its actually the bride and the groom who give each other communion, not the priest, I've seen it done both ways. To me - it just doesn't symbolize the becoming of one - when you have one taking communion and one who isn't.

  

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