I, like others, found this board while searching for some discussion/ideas/advice for my upcoming vow renewal ceremony. It is abundantly clear to me after reading dozens of responses that this is the WRONG place to be. What I don't understand, though, is why the comments are so hateful towards those wishing to celebrate a lasting marriage? I've read accusations that these women feel "entitled" yet have read posts from 2nd (or 3rd or 4th) time brides saying they didn't have the big party the first time so why not? I agree...why not? But by the same logic, why not celebrate (in any way you want) a successful marriage (and those who are divorced must know that keeping a marriage together is not easy)? I just can't figure out where the animosity is coming from.
My husband and I married young (both 20) and impulsively at the JOP. That was 25 years ago and in the course of the 25 years, raising 2 kids, surviving a brain anuerysm, etc. I have ALWAYS wished I had done things differently. I have attended weddings/showers/bachelorette parties for women who have been married multiple times, have lived together for years and/or have several children already. So some women are "entitled" to 2 or more big weddings yet others who stay together shouldn't feel envious attending these events? I even read on more than one thread that "if you want a wedding, then get divorced"! Seriously?
Perhaps the issue is semantics...calling it a wedding? I really wish I had never stumbled upon this board because I am now questioning EVERYTHING I have planned for my silver anniversary/vow renewal (and my plans never included showers/registries/bachelorette party/father walking me down the aisle).
The attitudes here just seem very hypocritical.
Edited: to remove duplicative punctuation