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New Jersey

Sunday Wedding?

I introduced myself about two months ago but since that seems like ages.. I'll do it again. My name is Jessica and my FI is Dan. We've been slacking on the wedding planning but we're stuck at home in the snow so figured we'd get to it today :)

I live in Ocean County, about 5 minutes from Bonnet Island Estate. I think we've decided on that as our venue but there are no Saturdays available for the next two years. We're not exactly in a rush to get married righ away but I don't want to plan a wedding for the next two years either.

My mom brought up the idea of a Sunday wedding - it sounds okay and definetely much cheaper and I'm thinking I may get vendors that are typically booked two years in advance that are availabe on Sundays.

Sorry this is so long.. but can you girls/guys give me some input on this?

Btw, I'm thinking of an early reception to make it more convenient for guests. ceremony around 3 or 4... so the reception would end around 9 or 10 pm.

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Re: Sunday Wedding?

  • edited December 2011
    I am having a Sunday wedding. We originally wanted a Saturday wedding but couldn't find a summer date and I really didn't want to wait til late fall(I am impatient) plus not for nothing Saturday weddings are expensive and I have a large invite list and in my heart I couldn't ask my dad to pay that kind of money. We sat down and thought about it and settled on a Sunday. My girlfriend got married on a Thursday and she gave me the best piece of advice. The people that you want there, will be there for you any day of the week to enjoy your special day. My reception is ending at midnight, will people be leaving early probably but I know there will be tons of people dancing the night away with me. Hope this helps.
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  • goaliegirlgoaliegirl member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Personally, I hate Sunday weddings.   I always leave early, because I have to work the next day and hate being out late.    Every Sunday wedding I have ever been to, lots of people leave early and honestly, it isn't as much of a party atmosphere because people don't drink and party too much because they have to work the next day.    If you don't mind if people leave early and you are OK with the fact that it might not be a big party/dancing crowd, then go with it.    As a pp said, people that are important to you will come regardless of when you have it, I just think it is a different atmosphere for a Sunday wedding.

    Have you considered a Friday wedding with a ceremony that starts around 6:30?  We got married on a Friday night and it was late enough that people had plenty of time to get out of work and to the wedding on time, and they didn't have to work the next day.  Friday weddings are also much cheaper than Saturdays.
  • edited December 2011
    I am also not a fan of Sunday weddings. If I was you, I'd go for a Friday night which is usually cheaper than Saturday. People will leave early and not drink and party as much on a Sunday like they would on a Friday or Saturday. People like having a day or two to recover after a good party before going back to work.
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  • edited December 2011
    Thanks for your input ladies. Fridays are not available either... I'm looking at September-November 2011.

    Your input really helps. The guests on my side are mostly nurses (including myself - soon to be nurse) so we don't have a schedule that consists of Monday-Friday 9-5 kind of job.. so maybe that's why I thought Sunday would be okay but you make really good points.
  • edited December 2011
    my wedding will be on a sunday... now you ladies got me worried :( didnt think it would be an issue for people since most guest are very close family/friends.
  • shoebieshoebie member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    The only way i have seen a Sunday wedding really pulled off is when its on a holiday weekend when people have off Monday. Sunday weddings are a huge pain in the a*s. Everyone clears out really early and your money ends up wasted. May i ask what venue you are looking at that every sat for 2 years is booked?

  • edited December 2011
    I am having a Sunday wedding, and I'm not worried about it at all. We're having an early ceremony at 11:30 AM and then cocktail hour and reception to follow. Everything will end around 5:00 so no one will have to worry about being out late, and the people that are travelling a long way plan on staying for a couple of days anyway.
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  • GolfChick78GolfChick78 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    My parents had a Sunday wedding.  They were married very young (20 and 18) and by their own admission were generally naive.  24 was their big number; my dad gave my mom his high school ring on 3/24, the got engaged on 12/24, and decided that they should get married in August and 8/24 happened to be a Sunday so that's what they picked.  Funny, they assumed that all weddings happened on a Sunday and thought it was kismet that 8/24 happened to fall on that day of the week.

    There's certainly nothing wrong with it and as you've already found, venues are much cheaper and more available.  But you're also absolutely right about timing; people will need to get back before it's too late, especially if you have some travelers.  Consider maybe even an earlier wedding.  I remember reading here that one bride is doing an early morning wedding with a brunch reception.  I love the idea of a morning wedding, though a reception during the daylight hours seems a little awkward.  Not sure how much dancing and drinking happens during those.
  • justad0remejustad0reme member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am also having a sunday early wedding and I'm not worried at all.  I believe whoever really cares for me and my fiance will come and have a good time with us.  Regardless of the date some people will always leave early because of personal schedules and whatnot.  Just make sure that booking a sunday fits your vision and expectations of your wedding.  I fell in love with my venue and felt that a day wedding would look soo beautiful in the gardens.  ;]

    Good luck!! 
    ~~* Jen *~~
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_sunday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:0c3b1f0a-fdb5-4dfb-b832-e87ae79e5b80Post:93410866-408f-4de7-8d1e-6c0edc2b0abd">Re: Sunday Wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Have you considered a Friday wedding with a ceremony that starts around 6:30?  We got married on a Friday night and it was late enough that people had plenty of time to get out of work and to the wedding on time, and they didn't have to work the next day.  Friday weddings are also much cheaper than Saturdays.
    Posted by goaliegirl[/QUOTE]
    I agree with this. I'm personally not a fan of Sunday weddings either as they definitely have a different vibe compared to a Friday or Saturday night wedding.
  • goaliegirlgoaliegirl member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_sunday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:0c3b1f0a-fdb5-4dfb-b832-e87ae79e5b80Post:184d9994-2568-4e7b-9ae1-de7483670a63">Re: Sunday Wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am also having a sunday early wedding and I'm not worried at all.  I believe whoever really cares for me and my fiance will come and have a good time with us.  <strong>Regardless of the date some people will always leave early because of personal schedules and whatnot.  Just make sure that booking a sunday fits your vision and expectations of your wedding.</strong>  I fell in love with my venue and felt that a day wedding would look soo beautiful in the gardens.  ;] Good luck!! 
    Posted by justad0reme[/QUOTE]

    Yes, there will always be people that have to leave early, but for Sunday night weddings...majority of people will leave early, it makes a big difference.  If you are paying for a reception that goes until 11 or 12 and majority of your guests leave around 10-1030 because they have to go to work it makes a BIG difference.

    The second part about making sure it fits your vision is very important IMO....if you are OK with it not being a big party atmosphere then go with it.    For us, a Sunday wedding was not even considered because we wanted it to be a party with the dance floor packed, etc.    So, you are so right in saying that make sure it fits your vision of what you want your wedding to be!
  • sgdc2011sgdc2011 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    If your doing a Sunday, make it earlier, I know I am usually in bed at 10 on a Sunday, So to be honest, I would be leaving around like 9-9:30.  I think the 3-8 is still early enough that people would stay the whole time.
  • edited December 2011
    anyway you put it Sunday or Friday there will be pros or cons...if you want people at your ceremony they will have to leave work early on Friday or take the day off(for example I work 11-7),  as on a Sunday people are off and will be able to make it. If you want everyone to stay till the end then Friday could be a better choice. But in all honesty if they want to stay till the end they will. It's like a Holiday party on a Wednesday you know you shouldn't have drank that last drink but you'll deal with that choice in the morning.

    In the long run, Friday, Saturday or Sunday not everyone will be at the church, they might leave early(they have a long commute) or might be late to your reception but in the end I highly doubt you will have 7 people left on the dance floor. Most people will take a day off from work and enjoy the weekend. Most people look for an excuse for a long weekend(on either end) Laughing
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  • hcer0708hcer0708 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am getting married on the Sunday of Labor Day weekend. I have been to tons of weddings on Sundays and never once did I leave early because of work the next day.
  • edited December 2011

    If you have your heart set on that place there is nothing wrong with a Sunday wedding.  I am going to be the dissenter here and say I MUCH prefer a Sunday wedding over a Friday one. 

    I dont know about the rest of you, but for a Friday wedding, I'd still have to leave work early because I like to attend the ceremony, even if it wasn't til 6:30, people still have to go home and get dressed up and travel.  Second of all, after work I am tired and I just want to go home and relax, not rush around to make a wedding time.  Third of all, then I have rush hour traffic to deal with both coming home and going to the ceremony, which increases my chances of missing it and makes me more stressed out.  By the time I get to the wedding, I am not really into being there. 

    Sundays... yes, people can not stay out as late, so you make sure to start earlier.  Sure people may get less drunk, but is this a terrible thing???  Keep in mind, people will be well-rested from the long weekend so they wont need as long to recover after the wedding. 

    It is important to take into account how far people are traveling as well.  If you have anybody coming from far away for a Friday wedding, they have to take two days off, but only one for a Sunday wedding (Monday). 

    The most fun wedding I ever went to was on a Sunday and ended by 10pm.  The most boring wedding I ever went to was on a Saturday night and ended by midnight.  The people and the music make the party.  Be careful to pick a great DJ and spend the time telling him what kind of music you like.  And make sure the lights wont be on full-blast in the reception hall!  A dimly lit room helps the party atmosphere.  Good luck!

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  • goaliegirlgoaliegirl member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_sunday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:0c3b1f0a-fdb5-4dfb-b832-e87ae79e5b80Post:bc47555e-65ad-42ac-943f-a4ed0ec1b892">Re: Sunday Wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In the long run, Friday, Saturday or Sunday not everyone will be at the church, they might leave early(they have a long commute) or might be late to your reception but in the end<strong> I highly doubt you will have 7 people left on the dance floor</strong>. Most people will take a day off from work and enjoy the weekend. Most people look for an excuse for a long weekend(on either end) 
    Posted by ants624[/QUOTE]

    You would be surprised!   I have seen this happen MANY times.  And in this economy, a lot of people can't afford to just take days off so they can go party at a wedding on a sunday night.     5-10 years ago, I bet this was very common, but times are changing. 
  • uppereastgirluppereastgirl member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am not a fan of Sunday night weddings because they make for a hellish start to the work week (although I much prefer them over Friday weddings because those make for a hellish Friday).  And I don't think we've ever stayed to the end of a Sunday night wedding.  I think it is nice of you to think of your guests and end on the early side, but you still may have some people who aren't happy about it.  Would you do a daytime wedding?  I don't mind Sunday morning weddings at all. 

    If I were in your position though, I would either hold out for two years or find another venue.  Bonnet Island is supposed to be really cool, but there are at least a few other really cool venues in NJ.  I was really, really picky about venues, but Saturday was non-negotiable for me.
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  • edited December 2011
    We are having a Sunday wedding that will end around 10pm and we aren't worried about it at all. I'm not sure if this is a factor for you at all or not, but if you have Jewish friends, they may not be able to attend a wedding on a Friday night if they are observant. We're an interfaith couple so a wedding on a Friday night or Saturday before sundown was out. We aren't religious but want to be respectful of people in his family that are.
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  • edited December 2011
    Thanks for all the input ladies. Looks like I have a lot if thinking to do! Planning a wedding for two years is something I don't have the time or energy for but it looks like that may have to be an option..... or I may go for the Sunday and whoever wants to be there will be. Oh boy.... haha. Thanks again!!
  • edited December 2011
    Maybe you have your heart set on Bonnett Island. But, have you looked at other venues? There are a lot of nice venues in both Monmouth and Ocean Country.
  • felicia220felicia220 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    That is a good point PP, I had a friend who got married on a Sunday night (the bride is jewish) it really wasn't that big of a deal.  Yeah you have to get up early for work the next day, but you only live once, so you just deal with it for the next day.  As my dad always says, Work hard, Play Harder.  
  • smw42smw42 member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_sunday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:0c3b1f0a-fdb5-4dfb-b832-e87ae79e5b80Post:dc3b111f-46c7-47ff-b3d7-e3d18c488ef6">Re: Sunday Wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]That is a good point PP, I had a friend who got married on a Sunday night (the bride is jewish) it really wasn't that big of a deal.  Yeah you have to get up early for work the next day, but you only live once, so you just deal with it for the next day.  As my dad always says, Work hard, Play Harder.  
    Posted by felicia220[/QUOTE]

    And come on- who can argue with your dad? Seriously!
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  • edited December 2011
    I have been to a few venues so far - Rams Head Inn, The Carriage House and Addison Park. They are all very beautiful but I'm also very stubborn and have my heart set on Bonnet Island. We can't all get what we want though... so I'll keep you ladies updated on my decision :)
  • felicia220felicia220 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_sunday-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:0c3b1f0a-fdb5-4dfb-b832-e87ae79e5b80Post:d9a674e4-1075-46f2-ad41-a5e5839ca881">Re: Sunday Wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Sunday Wedding? : And come on- who can argue with your dad? Seriously!
    Posted by smw42[/QUOTE]

    <div>Sherri, I literally LOLed.  I mean, right?!, I swear that man has more of a social life than I do, I have never meet someone who is such a serious businessman during the day and the life of the party at night like him.   He would rock a Sunday night wedding like it was 1999....hahaha</div>
  • edited December 2011
    I had a Sunday wedding during the summer & it worked out well. I had a little less than 100 guest + alot of OOTers. Many people made a mini-vacation out of it so it did not matter it was on a Sunday. Lots of people went into work late Monday/not at all. As a guest I wouldn't mind a Sunday wedding in the summer because it would give me an excuse to take off Monday & relax on the beach. I also don't think the vibe was any different...everyone was still drinking/partying/having a good time. We had a 4pm ceremony at the venue so everything was over by 9:30pm, but most people slept over at the hotel (it was the Molly Pitcher) that night so no one had to drive. 
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  • G&G2010G&G2010 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Did you try their newer venue, Mallard Island Yacht Club, which is right next door? Maybe they have a Saturday night available. 

    Also, you may like The Pleasantdale Chateau, which is also an estate that you rent out for the night, and Natirar Estate in Peapack.

    Sundays & Friday weddings are tough but I agree with PP that those who want to be there will be there. I got married on a Friday night since there were no Saturdays available around the time we wanted to get married. It wasn't really that much cheaper than the prices we were quoted for the 2 available Saturdays (less than 3% difference). We couldn't do those dates because we had family weddings on those dates so we ended up with a Friday night & it worked out great. We invited about 130 people and had 125 guests at our wedding. I was worried because I'm not a huge fan of Friday or Sunday weddings, but it worked out. We got married at the Crystal Springs Resort in Hardyston, NJ and many of our friends arrived early to sit by the pool or go to the spa during the day on Friday & the majority of guests stayed at the hotel on Friday night. We all had a great day together on Saturday afternoon as well.

    If you choose to have your wedding on a Sunday night at Bonnet Island, I think you and your guests will have a great time...it's a beautiful place! Just make sure to select a great band or DJ and you will be fine. Even if some people leave early, it's not as if you'll be alone the last hour of your reception.  

    There are a few other great venues in NJ that are comparable to Bonnet Island though so keep an open mind if you want a Saturday. I was set on having my wedding at Congress Hall in Cape May and looking back, I'm so glad that it didn't work out and that I kept looking because I loved my venue. Good luck!  
  • edited December 2011
    G&G2010 - I'm not crazy about Mallard Yacht Club - something about the room doesn't do anything for me. Pleasantdale Chataeu is beautiful but I want to stay close to home - Bonnet Island is minutes from my house.

    I agree with you, Friday or Sunday would not be my first choice but there may be some things I need to compromise if I want to get married sooner and at a certain place.
  • wedwed11wedwed11 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think Bonnet Island is so beautiful.
    I think a Sunday wedding is fine with the timeline you stated. I think it's fine if some people leave a little early if they have to got to work. Also, some people can take off work as well.
    I can't believe that the Bonnet Island is booked on Saturdays for 2 years!!! What about Mallard Island? Isn't that close?
  • edited December 2011
    I am having a Sunday wedding starting at 11:15 am (we are having a rabbi officiate and didn't really have a choice). If you have your heart set on that location, I don't think there is anything wrong in having a Sunday wedding. I feel like the people that want to witness your wedding won't care if it's a Sunday and they will make every effort to be there.
  • Faith2730Faith2730 member
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011

     I personally am not a fan of Sunday weddings especially if the venue has a lot of windows which lets in a lot of light.  I like a dimmer romantic atmosphere.  However, everyone is always going to have an opinion and your not going to satisfy every guest.  Go with what you want. Like other people said if someone is important to you they will be at your wedding regardless of the day.

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