Just A Thought

JenGin74 · August 2010

I don't think she (Lenore) meant any harm. What she's trying to say probably just came out wrong.

Unless she's secretly a hateful preachy biitch, in which case I retract my previous statement.

Lenore2010 · August 2010

Hey, everyone is entitled to their opinion of this post, for sure

Maybe my past of extensive board moderating DOES give me a preachy tone on these types of issues. Sorry, not intending to come off that way at all.

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

"I guess my thought is: reserve judgement."

It's the imperative sentence. It gets people up in arms. My immediate reaction is, "Don't tell me what to do!" I hate the implied "you" in real life and online.

But I like Lenore. I imagine she wears Victorian attire every day, and sits in her study while writing with a fountain pen.

SarahPLiz · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:a8da0d83-db99-4456-a92c-05857f354e93">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just A Thought : Thanks! I can't get on to FB from work, they have it blocked, so I'll try tonight. Also I didn't want to send a reply PM from work because sometimes doing so causes all my windows to randomly close, so if it doesn't work then I'll PM you later.
Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

<div>YAY! </div>

beatlesgirl25 · August 2010

The more you know, East...

Alright, in the spirit of discussion, this is my honest to goodness attitude about liking/disliking people on an internet message board. I have been here for over a year and have made friends, some of them RL and some are close email buddies. I even went to a fellow knottie's wedding this year. So when we lovefest here and have other discussions, naturally they are the people I will be upfront about liking and giving the benefit of the doubt to, because I KNOW them. It doesn't mean that I won't do the same for other posters who I've become acquainted with over their time here.

But am I going to do it for every single poster who drifts through SB because they might have a backstory I haven't considered? Probably not. But I'm also not going to be a diick to people here for no reason either. I think that's the best you're going to get from me, and I don't think it's unreasonable.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

Cew, YGPM.

Lenore2010 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:1ddb2de8-d82b-424a-b028-ee1deb955fa2">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]"I guess my thought is: reserve judgement." It's the imperative sentence. It gets people up in arms. My immediate reaction is, "Don't tell me what to do!" I hate the implied "you" in real life and online. But I like Lenore. I imagine she wears Victorian attire every day, and sits in her study while writing with a fountain pen.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

Thank you Jasmine, but OH if you only knew :)

missy68 · August 2010

See, I moderated a board for a few years (in fact it is where I met my husband) as well, and I don't find it necessary to tell people this stuff.

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

I don't think I've ever seen you be a diick BG. I can't really picture it.

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

You can moderate my board Missy. :O

Lenore2010 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:55fa011f-f37f-4ac1-aeea-2115b82da4e3">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]See, I moderated a board for a few years (in fact it is where I met my husband) as well, and I don't find it necessary to tell people this stuff.
Posted by missy68[/QUOTE]

I think the perceived "tell" was the propblem here. As I said, I was just giving an opinion that apparently came off as a lecture. I did not moderate a board for a few years. I moderated a couple of huge boards for several years with issues that would start online or offline and spill into one or the other place and OMG, the mess. No wedding website could ever duplicate anything that nuts, but that is a topic way beyond the scope of this post.

beatlesgirl25 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:edf71c24-66b1-4282-b464-463687f4de96">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think I've ever seen you be a diick BG. I can't really picture it.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

Ha, well thanks! Same to you, dear. :) I admit I've had no problem going after people who insult the posters here or act all inflammatory and BSC. (see: sig quote)

future-mrs · August 2010

*pouts* I want TK FB friends!

/threadjack

betrothed123 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:e48f47eb-f063-4cf1-b90d-1af721f5df75">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just A Thought : I think the perceived "tell" was the propblem here. As I said, I was just giving an opinion that apparently came off as a lecture. I did not moderate a board for a few years. I moderated a couple of huge boards for several years with issues that would start online or offline and spill into one or the other place and OMG, the mess. No wedding website could ever duplicate anything that nuts, but that is a topic way beyond the scope of this post.
Posted by Lenore2010[/QUOTE]
Oh well that changes everything <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" />

[Deleted User] · August 2010

I will say that there are several people that I've encountered on the boards that I don't care to ever know IRL. And I actually don't believe they are the same IRL as they are on TK because I think they use the boards as a way to relieve stress by being enormous bitches. I bet I would actually like them IRL, but I don't give two fuucks about that because I would never want to 'know' someone that could be that big of a cvnt to someone they've never met.

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:860acfe2-5276-46c1-98ac-557652ad7042">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]I will say that there are several people that I've encountered on the boards that I don't care to ever know IRL. And I actually don't believe they are the same IRL as they are on TK because I think they use the boards as a way to relieve stress by being enormous bitches. I bet I would actually like them IRL, but I don't give two fuucks about that because I would never want to 'know' someone that could be that big of a cvnt to someone they've never met.
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

I completely understand why you feel this way. I think you're spot on about using this as an outlet to be mean. I think it's cathartic for some people to put others down and make themselves feel more in control of their own lives.

beatlesgirl25 · August 2010

Excellent point, Cew. It's a shame, but on the bright side, I suppose it's better than people who are super nice on the boards but actually horrible, duplicitous people IRL. I wonder if there's actually people like that here.

Betrothed, thanks to your new pic, I now read all your comments with a sassy sashay as you walk away. Throw in some z-snaps and you'd be golden.

JenGin74 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:860acfe2-5276-46c1-98ac-557652ad7042">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]I will say that there are several people that I've encountered on the boards that I don't care to ever know IRL. And I actually don't believe they are the same IRL as they are on TK because I think they use the boards as a way to relieve stress by being enormous bitches. I bet I would actually like them IRL, but I don't give two fuucks about that because I would never want to 'know' someone that could be that big of a cvnt to someone they've never met.
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

Yup. Part of me (a very small part) feels bad for them because they're probably total doormats IRL.

betrothed123 · August 2010

Excellent, Beatles. That's exactly what I was going for

jasmineh7777 · August 2010

Just pictured it BG- "OP, you are projecting your insecurities onto these posters. Let's talk about that."

MarriedInAFever · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:e48f47eb-f063-4cf1-b90d-1af721f5df75">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just A Thought : I think the perceived "tell" was the propblem here. As I said, I was just giving an opinion that apparently came off as a lecture. I did not moderate a board for a few years. I moderated a couple of huge boards for several years with issues that would start online or offline and spill into one or the other place and OMG, the mess. No wedding website could ever duplicate anything that nuts, but that is a topic way beyond the scope of this post.
Posted by Lenore2010[/QUOTE]

Ok. That's nice. But I think your view is a little skewed. Maybe I'm alone here. But I just don't think we're *that bad*. If I actually took your advice and "reverse judged" everyone, I would be a lot MORE skeptical and judgey of everyone because I genuinely like the people here. I'm failing to see the problem.

future-mrs · August 2010

Totally spot-on Cew.

Lenore2010 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:d947c7c2-235b-4c0e-ac5e-d7fc032105c8">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just A Thought : Yup. Part of me (a very small part) feels bad for them because they're probably total doormats IRL.
Posted by JenGin74[/QUOTE]

Agreed. I think there are a lot of people like that online and it is actually kind of sad.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

And I would also like to add that I think this place would be boring as hell if we all liked eachother all of the time. Talk about painful. I'm about as puppies and rainbows as they come (lately), but I would rather have my eyes poked out than read some never ending asslicking contest day after day.

Disagreements make things interesting.

JenGin74 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:2f7b7556-d117-4020-9568-aba77271d148">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]Excellent point, Cew. It's a shame, but on the bright side, I suppose it's better than people who are super nice on the boards but actually horrible, duplicitous people IRL. I wonder if there's actually people like that here. Betrothed, thanks to your new pic, I now read all your comments with a sassy sashay as you walk away. Throw in some z-snaps and you'd be golden.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

Sometimes I think this might be me :(

It's not like I'm horrible and nasty IRL, but at the same time I don't let anyone take advantage of me and can come off as a total bitch if I've been wronged or feel backed into a corner.

beatlesgirl25 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:e20b649c-9568-4714-b56a-1e5c464c4eb8">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]Just pictured it BG- "OP, you are projecting your insecurities onto these posters. Let's talk about that." ;)
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

It's like you're inside my head, Jas. Do you think a poll with Rorschach cards would be inappropriate? If only there was a way to make projective tests clicky... ;)

Lenore2010 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:abefe406-14ea-4d46-b8d3-f9d5980cef63">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just A Thought : Ok. That's nice. But I think your view is a little skewed. Maybe I'm alone here. But I just don't think we're *that bad*. If I actually took your advice and "reverse judged" everyone, I would be a lot MORE skeptical and judgey of everyone because I genuinely like the people here. I'm failing to see the problem.
Posted by MarriedInAFever[/QUOTE]

Like I said, not refering to some "problem" on SB. It was a general observation about online interactions that apparently came off as preachy or judgemental, and I did apologize for that. I am thinking I will leave it there.

betrothed123 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:51b0584b-8c36-4725-bb51-c01053254a82">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just A Thought : Like I said, not refering to some "problem" on SB. It was a general observation about online interactions that apparently came off as preachy or judgemental, and I did apologize for that. I am thinking I will leave it there.
Posted by Lenore2010[/QUOTE]
But why post it at all if it's not directed at the group of people you posted it for? That doesn't make any sense at all.

Nebb · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:090ffcf4-6683-4aea-b291-f3f565d4ff14">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Just A Thought : But why post it at all if it's not directed at the group of people you posted it for? That doesn't make any sense at all.
Posted by betrothed123[/QUOTE]

Im nodding my head along with everything youve said so far.

[Deleted User] · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_just-thought-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:ffcb09d1-ef44-4d98-bcef-8a90d91ee3e1Post:f60a7347-1881-49da-9fb6-2b0da8f032b1">Re: Just A Thought</a>:
[QUOTE]*pouts* I want TK FB friends! /threadjack
Posted by future-mrs[/QUOTE]

Future, YGPM.

/threadjack again.

Just A Thought

Re: Just A Thought

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