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Wedding Etiquette Forum
mespence47
member
You did WHAT?! (Kind of long vent)
Long story short: My FI is a high school football coach... Last night was the parent/player meeting with 40+ boys plus their parents in attendance.
He was explaining the summer schedule and when he got to our wedding date he INVITED ALL OF THE BOYS TO OUR WEDDING. Never mentioned it to me until this point. He at least told them that this would not include the reception, but still. Our venue is very small and if they come it's going to be sardine style.
I just wish he'd asked me first 
I would've have still let them come, but it wouldn't have been said in front of the parents... it would've been clear that just the boys were invited (not parents, girlfriends or other friends)... and I wouldn't have looked so mean because I blurted out, "We are?!" when he said we would like to extend an invitation...
I would've have still let them come, but it wouldn't have been said in front of the parents... it would've been clear that just the boys were invited (not parents, girlfriends or other friends)... and I wouldn't have looked so mean because I blurted out, "We are?!" when he said we would like to extend an invitation... So I'm not really asking for advice, but c'mon!
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Re: You did WHAT?! (Kind of long vent)
Not nearly as traumatic as your situation, but I know how you feel.
[QUOTE]I find it really inappropriate when teachers invite their students to personal events. If you are getting married in a church, there is nothing you can do to stop them from showing up to watch the ceremony if they know when/where, but actually extending an invite crosses a line for me.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]
Life and Love at #16 | our married life blog
Although I did get invited to a couple of quincenearas, I haven't gone. Once my students start graduating from high school I might go.....but thats different.
What to do now? I have no fricking idea. Say or do nothing? Hope they forget?
and you'd prob be able to hear it from two towns over
"So I sing a song of love, Julia"
06.10.10
BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
[QUOTE]I don't think it would be too bad to uninvite them given the circumstances of teacher/student relatinships. He can tell them at practice. "Look, I know I had said you guys can all come to the wedding but I've been advised that it's inappopriate because it crosses the professional line. I'm sorry guys." And I agree that since it's a bunch of HS football boys, they're probably not going to be upset since they probably don't really care that much to begin with. I'm sure they're happy for you guys but that doesn't necessarily mean they want to spend their Saturday afternoon in shirts and ties.
Posted by Mrs.B6302007[/QUOTE]
Excellent advice. I would do this.
Unless, you can't talk your FI into and he REALLY wants them there.....
1. They are high school boys and I doubt care about the wedding and therefore probably won't show up.
2. you do not have to invite them to the reception, like it was stated before, high school boys...and I would even go as far as saying boys in general do not care about etiquette.
3. When I was in high school I was very close with my basketball coach and the entire team went to his ceremony and him and his wife loved it! We just stayed in the back but we did take a picture with them.
In the end, I understand why your FI might have done that. I wouldn't get too worked up about it and just tell your FI to not mention it again unless someone asks. I would bet that no 16/17 year old boy is gonna ask about a wedding. My FI's boys team made fun of him for being engaged!
Men and their big mouths ;-)
[QUOTE]To the OP, I don't necessarily have advice, but I can relate! My husband was the same way. We were having a DW, but then having AHRs afterwards and ANYONE he ran into he would invite. It finally bit him in the ass when he opened his big mouth to someone we hadn't invited and the party was the next day.... Men and their big mouths ;-)
Posted by amys325[/QUOTE]
<div>It's kind of cute that they're excited and want to share, but give me a break... Men, sometimes, ugh! I think it's all going to work out in our case. I told him if he brings it up again, he is in big trouble. So I'm hoping that it was such a quick statement that they all just forget about it and enjoy their summers. Its the weekend before their 5 day camp starts, so I'm assuming that they'd want to do something much more fun than attend my wedding... Even though a lot of them call me Mom :(</div>