Wedding Etiquette Forum

Reception counts?

I am going to speak to my father and stepmother on Saturday on reception halls that my FI and I have looked at - since they are paying for the majority of it, they get a say.  I have added up the prices for different numbers of guests (100 and 150) and got to thinking about vendors.

I want to feed the DJ and photographer (I feel it's courteous) but do I include them in the final count of guests?  For example, if we invite 150 and they all say yes, would I tell the reception hall 152 guests, or would I say 150 and two plates for the vendors behind the scenes?

Not sure how to word/plan for this, and obviously it will make a difference as to whether we invite 148 people or 150 - my father wants precise numbers when I talk to him, or I wouldn't be worrying about this now).  Thanks for your help, girls!

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Re: Reception counts?

  • Your caterer/venue will be the ones who need the final head count. The vendors that you're going to feed aren't on your guest list (they don't need favors or invitations) but they are in your head count, as are you and your FI.
  • You might want to speak to your venue about it, as some venues will provide separate meals for the vendors.  I asked my venue, and they said yes, include them in the final count.
  • I would check with your venue.  Most will have an option for vendor meals, and those meals are not included in your head count.  Also, if you already have a photographer, DJ, etc, check your contracts, so specify that they will be fed the same meal at the guests.
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  • it depends on the venue.  We gave counts like 150+2.  They wanted the break down for doing the place setting.  (our vendors at in another room)







    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Check with your venue.  Vendors were half price and their recommended ones ate free, so it depends on their policy.
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  • We needed separate counts for vendors and kids.

    Don't forget to include yourselves in your final count!
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  • It also depends on your vendors' contracts - some of mine stipulated that they receive the same meal as the guests versus the vendor meal.  And then there's my DJ who apparently "never eats at weddings" even though he will be there from 5-12 :/
  • It depends on the venue.  Our DJ is a staff member for the venue, so he doesn't count.  But our photographer is not, so she does.
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