Age Difference and Babies! (multi-part thread with poll)

peaches85 · April 2010

FI is about 6 1/2 years older than I am, so I'm curious what the age difference is between all of you and your fiances/husbands (hence the poll below).

Because of his age, FI is really keen on having our first child within a year or two of us getting married, which works fine for me because my parents had my sister and me when they were older and I hated seeing them work so hard at their ages to help put me through school (and now my sister). I know most people are still working well past retirement age, but I really wish my parents didn't have to work quite so hard now that they are both at retirement age... I don't want to be like that when I'm older. So, basically, I'd like to have kids within a couple years of getting married as well.

I'm curious what all of you think... Would you rather have kids right after marriage or would you prefer to wait for awhile and enjoy married life before even thinking of letting kids enter the picture? Feel free to respond below and remember to answer the poll about you and your SO's age difference.

hugauke · April 2010

We would like to have kids 2-3 yrs after getting married. Enjoy our time togetherwhile we can. Too many people keep telling FI that your life is over once you have kids.

Laurms15 · April 2010

DH is 10 years older then I am.....we will wait 3-5 years for kids

jaimelody · April 2010

FI is 3 years older than me. We plan on waiting at least 2 years before having children.

sk2342 · April 2010

we are the same age.. i think 2-3 years (as he sits over my shoulder and sceams 5 years! lol)

rachaelb16 · April 2010

FI is two years older than me. We want to start having kids about two years after we get married.

clarereedy · April 2010

My fiance is ten years older than me. I'll be 31 in May and he'll be 41 in June. He keeps joking around that I could be three months pregnant at the wedding and no one would know....however, i would like to enjoy my martini bar that we are paying for!! We are planning to go on our honeymoon about three months after the wedding - I have to wait for a break from school (I'm a teacher). As long as I don't go on the honeymoon pregnant, we are completely open to whenever it happens. So who knows what will be going on in my life this time next year!!!

ddelo23 · April 2010

I couldn't answer the poll because we had our first child a year and some change before we got married. However, I was also pregnant within 3 months of the wedding, so I guess I could fall into the less than 1 year category.

kle0113 · April 2010

MH is 3 years older then I am. He is 35 I am 32. We are expecting our first in July and we got married March of 09. So just a little over a year we will have our first child.

uppereastgirl · April 2010

We're the same age. We got married when we were 27. I'm not sure if we'll ever have kid(s), but if we do I'd imagine we will have been married 7-8 years when we do. Even though we've been dating for a very long time, we still have a lot of living we want to do before we decide whether we want kids.

Lola Minnie · April 2010

we are 5 years apart. Plan to wait about a year.... maybe less.. we'll see

diamondx423 · April 2010

FI and I are the same age, and since I have PCOS which will make conception difficult we'll start trying soon after we're married.

leah2b · April 2010

FI is about 12 years older than I and I am now 33. We love our lives now and are very activie - we go out and do what we want, vacation where we want, etc and the selfish part of me has a hard time giving this up. We also do not have many nearby family members that can just wantch the kids for a night and we both work jobs that are time intensive (lawyers) so I worry how we will manage children.

I wish the human lifespan were more like 150 years so I could have another 50 to play around with before having the responsibility of children.

HeatherC37 · April 2010

FI is just over 3 years older than I am. I am 25 and he is 28. We would like to have kids in 2 to 3 years. We have been together for almost 6 years and settled into our careers so we are both ready for children.

cvl105 · April 2010

We have about a 7.5 year age difference....we'll be TTC soon. We're both ready.

DandT1206 · April 2010

i am only 7 months older (30... he'll be 30 in Aug).

We got married this past october and plan to try towards the end of this year (right around the 1yr anniversary mark). I guess we'll see how we feel then. We def. don't want to wait too long.

chrissy31805 · April 2010

FI and i are a year and a half apart. we definately want kids but are going to wait 2 to 3 years after we are married. we have been together 5 years and have never lived together or have gone on vacation together thanks to my strict italian parents. so once we get married we are going to enjoy our time of being alone together and vacationing

Karma01 · April 2010

9 months difference. I am the older one. I have baby fever because everyone around me is having babies!!! We will wait to start maybe next winter or spring.

carlaspeed · April 2010

Ohhh, dating 5 1/2 yrs, 5 yrs in difference, he is 31, I will be 26 soon in July, not ready at all for children (mentally & a little financially), just got my MBA and a new job as a senior financial analyst. The plan is to have children in 5 to 6 yrs, after we utilize our degrees, also I would love to stay with the kids until at least they go to kindergarden, I could not leave them at the daycare.... also so many plans to travel and do so many things before kids, enjoy married life!!!!!

DMLJ · April 2010

FI is 27 and I am 24. I want to have babies sooner rather than later because asperger's runs in his family (bro is diagnosed and i think is father also has it but is undiagnosed). They say that paternal age is a risk factor and it def. scares me. However, FI is beginning his MBA in Sept and wants to be done with that. Our plan has always been that I would be a stay at home mom so he needs a new job with a major pay increase in order to make this happen. We think about 5 years or so.

Julephenia · April 2010

FI is 3 months and 1 day older than me. He just started school again - architechture - for 5 years (1 year down), so, um, no kids for a while.

I used to want a kid before I was 30, but I'm really not so keen on that now. Some friends and most of our cousins have kids, and they are great... but, oy. Money and time and energy and work.

eleven29 · April 2010

We have a 1-year difference, I'm 24 and FI is 25. We'll be 25 and 26 when we get married and we'd like to have our first child by the time I'm 27/28, so I guess we'll be waiting 2-3 years after getting married. We don't plan on buying a house until about a year after we're married and he'll be finishing grad school then too, so we'll have to get re-settled financially and all before we can move onto that stage...plus I want to have some fun-married-life-alone-time before we shift all of our attention to a baby!

Lolyalyssa · April 2010

FI is three years older than me (I'm 28, he is 31). By the wedding we will have been living together for 7 years. We want to get pregnant during the first year of marriage. We didn't really feel like marriage was necessary for us until we wanted to have kids and now we want to have kids so that's a huge reason why we decided to get married.

cherylanddan0706 · April 2010

Ask me in 5 years

Lolya you decided to get married just to have a kid?

NJMom050911 · April 2010

We're both 31 and known each other since we were 12, we own a house together and are established in our careers, we will start trying right after the wedding. We are both very excited

dmoney79 · April 2010

i'm 31 (jan), and dh just turned 34 (apr)....so he's roughly 3 yrs older
we were together almost 3 years by the time he proposed, and then we bought a house together soon after that, but i didn't move in right away like i had planned...if i had, we probably would have started ttc on the honeymoon, but as it turned out, i didn't move in until the wedding....
we're very anxious to have kids...so we're currently ttc...

mrsdevilguy · April 2010

I'll be 33 when we get married and FI just turned 29. I don't want to wait too long but now that I'll be in two weddings about 8-9 months after our wedding we'll wait about 6 mos after the wedding (10/10) to start TTC.

jchristel · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_multi-part-thread-poll?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:ce03c9af-43bd-4e7f-a17f-3c2f361cb5b2Post:2b7b3aa1-c950-4791-afc2-62f394d11e6b">Re: Age Difference and Babies! (multi-part thread with poll)</a>:
[QUOTE]We're both 31 and known each other since we were 12, we own a house together and are established in our careers, we will start trying right after the wedding. We are both very excited :)
Posted by kathygrzywnowicz[/QUOTE]

We're in a similar situation, but my biological clock is dictating when we have kids more than anything. I'm 38 so we want to start trying soon after the wedding. Originally I wanted to wait 6 months or more, but we have a few friends that are having/have had fertility issues, so I realized it's probably better to start sooner than later in case we have trouble. I know a lot of women have children later in life, but I don't want to be an older Mom than I have to be for a lot of reasons.

Jaytee501 · April 2010

Our 1st anniversary is coming up & we'll be TTC very soon. I'm 37 so as Jen mentioned above, I am concerned about the fertility issues, etc., that can come with age.

Emotionally we feel ready, regardless: it's not a matter of just having a child "while we can." We just hope it happens!

sparkles2010 · April 2010

Getting married this August, I'm 26 and Fi is 27. I have two more years of school in the evenings (I work ft during the day). Ideally I would like to start a family after finishing school.

Linqdz · April 2010

DH and I are 4 months apart. He is 28, and I'll be 28 in July. We don't plan on waiting long. Our HM is in August, so we definitely dont wanna get pregnant before then. After that, we'll just let it happen...

Age Difference and Babies! (multi-part thread with poll)

Re: Age Difference and Babies! (multi-part thread with poll)

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