Wedding Etiquette Forum

Picture Editing

I have seen quite a few threads on here about editing pictures to exclude tattoos of bridal party members and hair colors. Do you find this rude?

As a wedding party member, if the bride had her pictures edited then posted them on Facebook changing my hair color, weight, or my tattoos I would be very hurt and offended. Especially if she did not talk to me about it first. I would even go almost as far to say that it would probably end our relationship depending on the edits.

What does everyone else think? I think it is incredibly rude.
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Re: Picture Editing

  • did this happen to you??? I would be shocked and then pissed.
  • I think it would be strange for someone to edit pictures to do that to their friends.  However, I haven't seen this advice given.  I haven't been around much lately so maybe I missed it.
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  • daffydilliedaffydillie member
    100 Comments
    edited June 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_picture-editing?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:656283b2-89ca-4887-ab87-002fae892228Post:b8c04d1f-4155-4184-b0a5-1f08b5f0820e">Re: Picture Editing</a>:
    [QUOTE]did this happen to you??? I would be shocked and then pissed.
    Posted by HockeyFan4[/QUOTE]

    I see a lot of people advising brides that they can just photoshop ink, piercings, and hair color out in their pictures of the wedding party and I find it offensive.

    I did have my hair color edited in my cousin's pictures. I have red/black hair. I was pretty angry and have not really talked to her since. I felt that if my hair color was such an issue, I really did not need to be there.

    Edit: I saw it several times on the wedding party boards and Mom and Maids. I have not seen tattoo questions really asked on this board. But I value the opinions of those of the etiquette people in terms of if it is truly rude or not. I am in a wedding in a few weeks with a strapless dress. And I really thought about how I would feel if the bride did that to me.
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  • I would find it rude. I'd be super pissed. My honest opinion: one of my BMs looked terrible on my wedding day. Her make up was awful, her hair was messy, and she didn't wear a bra (and yes, she really needed one). I will not be photoshopping her. She's a person, not a prop. 
  • Wow I would never have things like that edited .  It is rude and the people should accept what others look like.  If these people have a problem with a different hair color or tattoos they should have made it known before the wedding or not have people in it at all.  No everyone might look like someone's fantasy.  
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  • saacjwsaacjw member
    500 Comments 100 Love Its Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    I totally find it rude. I was always bugged when people edited my moles off (school pictures and stuff) and I didn't even choose those, they're just part of me. I can't imagine what it'd be like to have someone edit tattoos or hair color. 
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  • I recall this being talked about over a year ago. Brides asking if they should keep in their piercings or cover their tattoos. The advice was if you don't want to go through the hassle keep it. It is who you are and if you don't like how you (bride) looks then just have the photographer edit it. 

    I do not ever remember a bride asking about editing a bm's tattoo out (I could be  wrong but I honestly do not remember). 

    I also think it is rude that the bride made a major change and didn't give you a heads up. At least she didn't ask you to physically change your hair color. Still not cool what she did but at least you have that as a plus.
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  • daffydilliedaffydillie member
    100 Comments
    edited June 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_picture-editing?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:656283b2-89ca-4887-ab87-002fae892228Post:9fce2826-473e-4662-bb84-d84b1ab2bcbe">Re: Picture Editing</a>:
    [QUOTE]I recall this being talked about over a year ago. Brides asking if they should keep in their piercings or cover their tattoos. The advice was if you don't want to go through the hassle keep it. It is who you are and if you don't like how you (bride) looks then just have the photographer edit it.  I do not ever remember a bride asking about editing a bm's tattoo out (I could be  wrong but I honestly do not remember).  I also think it is rude that the bride made a major change and didn't give you a heads up. <strong>At least she didn't ask you to physically change your hair color. Still not cool what she did but at least you have that as a plus.
    </strong>Posted by erollis[/QUOTE]

    I do not see that as a plus at all. I would have rather her asked me first, because then I had the choice to not participate in her PPD if she found me so offensive. I may have some iota of respect for her if she would have asked me, the answer still would have been no and I would have respectfully declined, but photoshopping pictures of your friends and family is so rude. I must also add, my hair is not unprofessional. I do have a professional job and meet the dress code requirements of my place of employment. I also was actually having a good hair day, so I was pretty pumped. And the hair color is neither my natural hair color, black, nor red in the picture so it was quite obvious of the change.

    These posts have been more recent and ablout the bridal party. But I also have been talking to photogs that have also made the statements that it is becoming a trend with brides to photoshop their wedding pictures. I get photoshopping cars, poles, etc but people that you are supposed to love and cherish?
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  • I agree with you 100%. She she should have asked and this at least would have given you the chance to drop out. You have every right to be upset with her. Anyone would be upset understandably. But I have seen brides want to control every aspect of their bridesmaids before including tattoos, hair color, hair cut and piercings. I was just trying to find a silver lining that she wasn't so controlling that she had you physically change anything. Just the way I think. Have you talked it with her yet about this? 

    That is an interesting new trend to photoshop the bridal party. I guess it is the brides way to make everything perfect without offending anyone before the wedding. This is really low.
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