Hey i'm not sure what my first time will be since we are saving ourselves for that day. Can anyone tell me what the pain is like? the experience is like? please, i feel so nervous..... Can i have some advice please. my friends have told me that it is horrible
Re: Wedding Night and your first time
There are a very wide range of first time experiences out there, but you will have the comfort of knowing that you are with the man you love and will spend the rest of your life with. There might be a little bit of pain, but then again there might not be any at all. And even if the first time hurts a little bit- and it won't be horrible, I promise!- know that every subsequent time will get better and better
Pittsburgh sig: Favorite thing about fall= college football!
My recommendation (I've got kids, so obviously have had a LOT of sex)
- Get yourself some lubricant, ie KY jelly.
- Relax: the more tense you are, the more your body will not prepare itself
- While you or your new husband may be in a hurry, if you can both control yourselves, snuggle the night of your wedding, but wait for the morning for your first time. I say this because your wedding day is a beautiful event, but stressful and you will both be tired and maybe have had some alcohol. Get up before him if you can slip away, fix your face & hair, and then do it in the morning, when (unless you leave that day for your honeymoon trip), you will have some natural light and all the time you need to make it special. Also, bring a towel to bed, because sometimes there may be a little blood, and you want to make sure you don't leave any embarassing momento if you are in a hotel.
The best advice I can give you is that if you don't enjoy it the first time, you will learn. It takes time to get used to each other's needs & tempo.
Good luck, and congratulations on saving yourselves until after you are married. It can't be easy, but I'm sure you will feel it was worthwhile.
[QUOTE]You know all those other things you're not supposed to do before you're married even though you're not going "all the way"? Well, they're good practice. I'm NOT saying you should do them before the wedding. I'm saying that once you're married you should take your time having fun playing around and seeing what feels good and what hurts for a good amount of time before you get to the main event. Don't drink more alcohol than you're used to, either of you. especially him. Buy some lubricant and use a lot of it. Go slow, relax as much as you can, and make sure he knows to stop if you're really in pain.
Posted by nhelene[/QUOTE]
This is all great advice. Just relax and enjoy yourself. And don't stress if it's not exactly what you picture. You have lots of time to perfect your routine.
My Blog
[QUOTE]oh ok, cool advice. what does the moving your hips upward do? does it make it easier for insertion and what are the best styles or positions to be in?
Posted by abeed123123[/QUOTE]
For your first time I would reccomend being on your back (after lots and lots of foreplay to get yourselves ready). Moving your hips will make it easier for insertion, yes. Think about the angles involved. He will be leaning in towards you so you have to raise your hips to meet him halfway. Don't worry, you will figure it out!
My Blog
My fiance and I have been having sex regularly for about five years, and I can honestly say that it gets better and better as long as you both stay honest and open. If you tell him what feels good and what doesn't, you can both improve. If you don't, you get stuck in a rut.
Also, a friend of mine a while back took me to a sex shop to buy "real lube" and I've never gone back to KY, So I highly reccomend you get a brave friend or two and go try lubes (rub them between your fingers) to find one that doesn't feel sticky/greasy/unnatural. Lube will significantly lower the odds of a painful first-time, so get some for your wedding night :-)
Finally, don't take it too seriously! Sex is a totally bizzare act and the potential for awkwardness is huge! You'll enjoy it more (always) if you're ready to laugh it off and role with the punches.
I think it's great that you did what you both believe is right even when most of society might disagree! (My religion doesn't even have a marriage tradition, but I am a religious person so I understand the importance of following one's faith!)