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Add Bridesmaids?

spazticrexespazticrexe
100 Comments
in Wedding Party
Hi all, I've been tossing this around in my head as of late and I wanted to get someone else's take on it.

We're having a fairly small wedding (60 guests).  I know its silly, but because my FI doesn't have many friends and will only be having a BM, I have chosen only a MOH. However, I myself only have a few close friends and have been thinking about asking the other 3 to be bridesmaids.

Its been a little while since I chose my MOH, so I don't want it to feel like an afterthought to my friends. I do plan on getting them all gifts as a thank you for being great friends thus far in my life, so there's no budget concern.

So, thoughts - should I ask them and have everyone up there, or should I just honor them as guests?
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Re: Add Bridesmaids?

  • graysquirrelgraysquirrel member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I think that since you would be asking all 3 at the same time it is ok. It isn't like one person is being added at the last minute. If they are your closest friends and you really want them with you, it does not matter if the sides are even.
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  • balasjbalasj
    100 Comments
    Sounds like the other three girls are important to you so I think they would be flattered to be asked.  You clearly aren't just filling space or replacing someone so I don't think there should be any negative responses.
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  • em01092em01092 member
    1000 Comments
    Ditto PPs. Ask them! Don't worry about sides being even. Your MOH and your FI's BM can walk together and then your other maids can walk alone, or everyone can walk alone. No sweat. 
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  • rlavachrlavach member
    1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its
    I'd add them too. Like PP said, since it's not a last minute thing, they shouldn't think they were second-class in any way. If you sense that, then just tell the truth. You originally only had 1 to keep the sides even, but then realized it was silly to not have everyone, so you went for it. I'm sure they'll be more than delighted.

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  • maribeth721maribeth721
    500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    having the same exact number on each side isn't really tradition anymore. add who you want! And I don't think they will feel like after thoughts - especially if you only have an MOH picked.
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  • dumdumfroggiedumdumfroggie
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Since you hadn't previously picked BMs and are now adding more, you should be fine.  Go ahead and ask them!
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  • cebrady89cebrady89 member
    100 Comments
    I say add the people you want, but make sure that your fiance is okay with it - he doesn't necessarily have to add any more groomsmen, but I feel like you should make sure he doesn't have an actual problem with you asking more.

    I was in the reverse situation - my fiance has a ton of close cousins and lots of friends, so he could have had like 9 groomsmen...I only wanted a MOH and don't really have many close girl friends, and was always really embarassed that I didn't have enough friends to match his number. We ended up agreeing to choose 3 attendants each, but I feel bad he couldn't include more.

    That's the only reason I suggest talking to him about it -I'm sure he's more thick skinned than I am, though  ;)
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  • spazticrexespazticrexe
    100 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_add-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:8019f825-7ef2-4ae9-ba63-19970689acfdPost:d3dbcc1f-6967-440c-9a48-9421bb9594e7">Re: Add Bridesmaids?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I say add the people you want, but make sure that your fiance is okay with it - he doesn't necessarily have to add any more groomsmen, but I feel like you should make sure he doesn't have an actual problem with you asking more. I was in the reverse situation - my fiance has a ton of close cousins and lots of friends, so he could have had like 9 groomsmen...I only wanted a MOH and don't really have many close girl friends, and was always really embarassed that I didn't have enough friends to match his number. We ended up agreeing to choose 3 attendants each, but I feel bad he couldn't include more. That's the only reason I suggest talking to him about it -I'm sure he's more thick skinned than I am, though  ;)
    Posted by cebrady89[/QUOTE]

    Well I talked to FI about it last night and I think we're going to keep with the status quo - he doesn't have much family or friends and he feels similarly to how you felt.

    I'll find my ladies something to do... I'm definitely going to have one of them do a reading... any other suggestions? Don't really have any guy friends, they could be usherettes? Just don't want to make them do something stupid like hand out our non-existent programs<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-wink.gif" border="0" alt="Wink" title="Wink" />
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