Check out the Grapevine- it's walking distance from the Hawthorne. FI and I went there on Valentines' and the food was really delicious. A friend of ours had their rehearsal dinner there and had very good things to say.
Captain's is also in Pickering Wharf- haven't been there though. For other restaurant type places that may not be as private- try Rockefella's and/or Tavern in the Square.
I am having my rehearsal dinner at the Grapevine. I worked there for about 6 years and The Chef/owner is a very good friend of my mother. She is super willing to work with you on the menu, etc so that you get the dinner you are looking for. Call soon, though, because they book up very quickly in the summer months for rehearsal dinners! If you have a large amount of people, they will have you rent out the smaller of the two dinning rooms. Then you can chose whether or not you want to have a set menu or have people order off of the menu. You can also decide the appetizers and bar set up (cash/open) that you want. The food is excellent and is by far my favorite restaurant in the area.
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That's too bad about the grapevine. That room is not very big, so they might not have been able to accomodate the large party on a Friday night (very busy on the weekends). Capts is decent. I go there in the summer because they have beautiful views. In comparison to Victoria's Station, I like VS's food better believe it or not. Capts is better for sandwiches (fish based) and appetizers where as VS's has better entrees. I don't think the pictures on the website give VS justice. They can also accomodate larger parties, as can Capts. If food is a large factor, than I would do Victoria's Station. Pickering Wharf houses restaurants with good food and beautiful views. The surrounding areas such as Swampscott and Marblehead are going to get pricey. If you want to do something funky, you can go to Asahi (http://www.moondragon.org/salem/asahi.html) located near the Peabody Essex Museum. They are a Japanese Steak House and have a hibatchi grill!
Hope this helps!
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Re: rehearsal dinner in salem (again sorry)
Captain's is also in Pickering Wharf- haven't been there though. For other restaurant type places that may not be as private- try Rockefella's and/or Tavern in the Square.
Hope this helps!