Order of bridesmaids

elektrik273 · March 2010

Ok, I have a dilemma. My future sister-in-law is one of my bridesmaids--which is fine, because she's great and I would've never left her out! However, she's upset because she's going to be last in line. My MOH (my sister) will be right next to me and then my 2 best friends will be next and then my future sister-in-law will be last. I've known my 2 best friends for 15 years. I don't want them to be at the end. Also, I've been to plenty of weddings where a brother of the bride was at the end of the groom's side. So, why does it have to be different for the bridesmaids??? Am I wrong about putting her at the end or is SHE being unreasonable??

jagore08 · March 2010

Girls tend to be more sensitive then guys, that's why you're having this problem. Is your FSIL one to hold a grudge? If it's going to be an issue (for years to come) just put her next to your sister. She's going to be family so you will see her all the time. I'm sure your friends won't mind. It's a stupid argument (on your FSIL part) so try to do the best you can to have a happy wedding day.

banana468 · March 2010

I think it's silly to stress over WHERE in the BP you are. Someone needs to be the last in line in an honorary position.

That doesn't mean that the person is the LEAST honorable to you though.

Instead, can you come up with an arbitrary line up? Go by height or something?

elektrik273 · March 2010

If I went by height she'd still be last! haha...I should've just said that to begin with...oh well. She just doesn't want to get stuck walking with one of my fiance's friends. But I'm having the bridesmaids walk down the aisle by themselves and then I'll partner her with one of her brothers (my fiance's best men) to leave the ceremony and to enter the reception. That'll probably solve the problem.

stina93446 · March 2010

Just tell her it's because of height. She can't argue with that. She'll have to get over it. I had my bms walk down the aisle by themselves. They liked the special 30 seconds to themselves in the spotlight.

megk8oz · March 2010

I've actually never seen a wedding where the GMs and BMs did the processional together. Usually the GMs and the groom walk in (Sometimes down the aisle, sometimes they're just standing up there already), then the moms get seated, then the BMs walk. They usually pair off for the recessional, but honestly if this is just about her not liking the GM she's lined up with, she can get over it for the 10 second walk, or you can just have everybody "weave", so nobody's paired up.

I'd say just use the height excuse if it'll still fly.

mvmurkowski · March 2010

Tell her the height thing or say they're lined up in order that you met them. Is she younger?? Unless something else is going on I'm sure she'll get over it. I say keep it as is but I also agree with Jagore...if you really think this will be an issue for years to come then move her next to your sister...if your friends are true friends they'll understand and be fine with doing it to humor her and help keep you sane!

bablingbrooke · March 2010

Tell her it's by height. Then leave it at that.

Honestly though, I don't think this is anything worth arguing about. My BMs literally chose their order as they lined up to walk down the aisle (GM waited at the altar w/ DH) and the MOH went last so that she'd stand closest to me. Does it really matter what order they're in when you're up there?

MyNameIsNot · March 2010

I agree, tell her it's by height.

While it's true that they probably are standing up there in order of importance, it can be hurtful to be told you are the least important. I had my girls line up in alphabetical order, the same as their names were listed in the program.

suz62984 · March 2010

I didn't know that the line meant so much. Other than the MOH place I didn't know the order matter. I'm just going by height on both sides. We have a wide array of tall and short people so I think it will work out just fine.

Just tell her that "oh the order doesn't matter. Standing up with me is what matters. You are a great BM and I love having you in the wedding." Being mushy will make her feel bad for complaining further.

noodle_oo · March 2010

She's being dumb to care, but I'd take the PPs advice.

If you move her next to your sister, I'm sure your friends will understand anyway, so I'd just do whatever causes YOU the least stress, even if it is appeasing her.

dibsontop · March 2010

Tell her to think of it as she's not actually last, but instead, she's first. As I've seen it, usually the MOH is the last of the girls to walk in before the bride, therefore, it's reverse order. So you're entrusting her with the great honor of leading the ladies in

Order of bridesmaids

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