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May 2012 Weddings
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Surpise shower vent

Melissa51212Melissa51212 member
500 Comments
in May 2012 Weddings
Okay...first I want to say I am totally grateful for my girls. I have awesome girls but this Surpise shower deal is bringing out the worst in me. I'm becoming a spoiled brat checking the registry 1000 times begging my fi and mom to tell me the date. I hate not having control of my life and I know it's a super nice thing they are doing but I wish I just said no Surpise from the beginning it's acutally giving me anxiety. Blah...bad bride bad.
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Re: Surpise shower vent

  • mancila60mancila60
    1000 Comments
    I can actually understand this. My shower is not a surprise as far as date and time goes but the details have been kept a secret from day 1. It has driven me crazy! I too feel like I need to control things and I hate not having any ideas on things. My best advice I can give you is to relax. They would never do anything to hurt you. And obviously you picked these girls for a reason so trust them to do the right thing. Plus you said your mom and FMIL were in on it so trust them. Keep yourself busy with other things and when the time comes then just sit back and enjoy it.
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  • dori851dori851 member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    I hate surprises, so I hear ya :)

    Just try your best to be patient & know that it's probably coming up soon!
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  • cpm1223cpm1223
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_surpise-shower-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:e2d9b671-1edc-4be0-bb73-697b3340d014Post:c936b4f0-3c7c-440e-ad4a-a01bfabbef69">Re: Surpise shower vent</a>:
    [QUOTE]I can actually understand this. <strong>My shower is not a surprise as far as date and time goes but the details have been kept a secret from day 1. It has driven me crazy! I too feel like I need to control things and I hate not having any ideas on things</strong>. My best advice I can give you is to relax. They would never do anything to hurt you. And obviously you picked these girls for a reason so trust them to do the right thing. Plus you said your mom and FMIL were in on it so trust them. Keep yourself busy with other things and when the time comes then just sit back and enjoy it.
    Posted by mancila60[/QUOTE]

    same for me! I am very much a planner and a bit of a control freak so having  the thought of someone else planning my shower kind of scared me, but I'm just going with the flow and trying to relax about it. I trust my BMs and my Mom & FMIL are also involved so I'm sure everything will turn out great!
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  • lnvane00lnvane00 member
    500 Comments

    UGH! I know how you feel! SO nice of them to do this for you but I hate not knowing stuff! Hate it!

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  • ladyj2480ladyj2480
    10 Comments
    Oh I know how you feel!!!  I have the greatest friends!  BUT, while I was helping them with planning (helping pick out places to have it, themes, etc) one of the girls emailed me and said "we know your ideas, now your job is just to show up at the time your invitation will tell you".  And just like that, I was released of my helping duties.  It really kind of irritated me.  I love that they want to take care of everything, but I would think that they would know how much it stresses me out to not be able to be involved in it.
    They did, however, allow me to be in on the planning of the date (we have so many people with such different jobs, so we had to coordinate on that)

    My advise to you, is advise that my other "lady of honor" gave me; relax and enjoy letting other people take care of this for you. With planning a wedding, you have so much on your plate anyway.  :)
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  • vineyard12vineyard12
    500 Comments
    I know NOTHING about mine...no date, time, location. I am not sure if I will have one, but my mom said I "probably would." since she and SIL's mom threw her one two or three weeks before the wedding and hers was a surprise, too. I wish I would get atleast a date so I don't show up looking like a slob! Its driving me NUTS too.

    Just relax and know it's all in good hands...and you'll have fun!
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  • Laurie109Laurie109 member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    ME TOO!
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  • mandi921vhmandi921vh member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    I know exactly how you feel!!!!!!

    Originally my MOH asked me if I wanted it to be a surprise and I said no. Then my mom found out and told MOH to change it and basically bitched me out (my mom) saying that showers are supposed to me surprises even though I said I didn't even know it was supposed to be. 

    I said that it would suck because FI's family would be coming from OOT and I would want to spend time with them over the weekend if my shower was on a Sunday because that's when it was originally. They would all be housed at my relatives house for the whole weekend and I wouldn't get to see them.

    I was reading in one of my wedding books FMIL got me that talks about the shower and how the bride is supposed to dress appropriately for the venue and type of shower. UM WTF how can I do this if I have no idea where it is and may end up showing up in my sweats or worse leggings without a top that covers but butt!
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  • AurorasEnvyAurorasEnvy
    2500 Comments
    I'm totally on your side...if my MOH had proposed a surprise shower, I would have been 100% uncooperative from the start =]
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  • littleshrinklittleshrink member
    100 Comments
    I think I am the ONE person who doesn't get this at all.  Why on earth would you be nervous or upset about a party for you?  It's to celebrate you and your future husband, right?  Not some "pin her down and don't let her get married" crazy intervention thing! 
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  • ACKHillaryPACKHillaryP member
    10 Comments
    My shower was a completely 100% shock and surprise to me. I had NO CLUE since I had made it clear that I did not want a shower.
    My Dad pushed for it and planned it, and it ended up being a really nice time. BUT, I wished I had known about it so that I could be prepared to see all the people, and be prepared to have everyone stare at me as I opened presents, etc etc. Also, we were pressed for time since we had a meeting with the priest that day also, so I wish we had more time for it too. It sounds crazy but I hate that whole "it all about youuuuuuu" thing where ALL the attention is on you for the entire time.
    It was VERY nice and I am extremely grateful and once I was there, I was fine and I had fun... but yeah a small 'heads up' woulda been nice.
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