Earn cash as you plan. Get a $20 gift card for every 200 points with The Knot Rewards
African American Weddings
chescam
member
Family
In planning this wedding we decided not to ask FI's dad for any money. We asked for his input on the wedding and he never got back in touch with us. He contacted FI yesterday to let him know that he's upset his name is not on the invitation. He originally told FI that he would try to contribute something in August. Good thing we didn't count on that because we'd still be waiting. Now he's saying he can help out at the end of Oct. or November. Are you serious...after the wedding when everything has been paid for? WTH. I just don't get it.
Now his uncle is saying he didn't receive his invitaiton. And he wants to add 15 people. Who does that????? FI explained to him that it's not in our budget. Luckily he offered to pay for the additional guests. So now I'm stuck calculating everything from additional linens, flowers, food, etc, to accommodate these people. Oh what joy.
side note: if people ask to be added and you can't accommodate, just say exactly that. Do not give people a reason why. If you say you don't have space, they'll say they'll stand; if you say no children, they'll say they'll pay for the child's plate; if you say it's not in your budget they'll say they won't eat. Luckily for us, FI's uncle offered to pay but we'll wait until we have the money in our hands before we add his guests to the list.
Our rsvp deadline is Thursday. We've allotted 1 week to track down stragglers and then the following week we meet with our venue to start working on the set up and selecting our options. The whole room is being transformed so we have to worry about bringing in chairs, tables, the stage, ceiling and wall drapings, and lighting. Alot of this is dependent on our final guest count. Needless to say, the next few weeks are going to be pretty hectic.
Then my cousin rsvps that she's coming and added a note talking about she's actually unsure if she'll be coming to the wedding and has no idea when she'll be able to book her flight but she wanted to be sure her seat was secured just incase. No boo boo, how about you wait until you've booked your ticket to rsvp yes. You've known about the wedding for over a year. If the deadline comes and you have not booked your ticket, I'm changing your rsvp to decline.
I've just had it with people and their foolishness. There are other people I thought would surely cause me grief but so far family has been a pain in the butt.
Ok I'm done, did not mean for this to be so long.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Family
hd to call and tell her no. Funny how people want to have a date but single, or unable to find a babysitter but every weekend out at the club. So where are your kids then? Fi had a relative decline due to surgery then his great aunt called to say the relatives daughter will be coming in her place. Wth? My fi does not even know the daughter. I would like to look out at my wedding and say I know some of these people and not strange faces.
Hold steady with your choices because people will sure test them.
Baby Gender Predictor
[QUOTE]In planning this wedding we decided not to ask FI's dad for any money. We asked for his input on the wedding and he never got back in touch with us. He contacted FI yesterday to let him know that he's upset his name is not on the invitation. He originally told FI that he would try to contribute something in August. <strong>Then my cousin rsvps that she's coming and added a note talking about she's actually unsure if she'll be coming to the wedding and has no idea when she'll be able to book her flight but she wanted to be sure her seat was secured just incase. No boo boo, how about you wait until you've booked your ticket to rsvp yes. </strong>You've known about the wedding for over a year. If the deadline comes and you have not booked your ticket, I'm changing your rsvp to decline. I've just had it with people and their foolishness. There are other people I thought would surely cause me grief but so far family has been a pain in the butt. Ok I'm done, did not mean for this to be so long.
Posted by chescam[/QUOTE]
I'm sorry for your frustration but I had to Laugh at this! Don't let these people steal your joy.
[QUOTE]I know how you feel. I am going to be a dirty dog to a lot of people because of them not being invited to my wedding. People are already asking if they can come to the ceremony only, willing to purchase their meal, or any other unrealistic offers that Chescam and other Knotties have mentioned.... <strong> I am so thankful that we booked a small venue </strong>so that we would not be able to cave into people's requests to be included in the wedding. We also were very careful not to over-invite based on assumed declines. So far, I only have 1 decline so that would have been a bad plan. I guess I just need to get through the next 46 days.
Posted by mikimoto6[/QUOTE]
<div>I wish we had done this. Our venue can hold as much as 500 people. But they drape it and add other stuff to fill the room based on the guest count. </div><div>
<div>People are unbelievable. One lady asked my mom if she could just come to the ceremony. My mom nicely explained to her that the bride and groom already sent out invitations and that it would be an additional expense for us because we would have to rent a chair cover and sash just for her and she would inconvenience us since her seat wasn't budgeted for. Hilarious!!! gotta love my mom. The lady got the point though. lol</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>
</div></div>
[QUOTE]People are so inconsiderate. Fi's aunt rsvp for 5 additional guests aka her friends. Is this her wedding or child? No! Fi hd to call and tell her no. Funny how people want to have a date but single, or unable to find a babysitter but every weekend out at the club. So where are your kids then? <strong>Fi had a relative decline due to surgery then his great aunt called to say the relatives daughter will be coming in her place. Wth? </strong>My fi does not even know the daughter. I would like to look out at my wedding and say I know some of these people and not strange faces. Hold steady with your choices because people will sure test them.
Posted by mahoganieyes[/QUOTE]
<div>I never got this. If you can't make it, don't send someone in your place. FI has attended at least 3 weddings where I couldn't make it. He went by himself and if I were in the same situation, I would too. It's not like he didn't know other people at the wedding. Thanks for the encouragement</div>