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Wedding Etiquette Forum
Bonzo2011
member
Gift for elopement?
One for H's cousins just announced that on the 21st, she and her BF went to Reno and got married. We're very happy for them. I know normally couples don't get gifts when they elope, but had they had a wedding inviting family, we would have given them a nice gift.
Where H and I are getting a little torn is that his other cousin (older brother to the wife above) is getting married early September. Ceremony, reception, they're registered, etc. H and I had agreed on a gift budget for this couple. But, if we want to give the eloping cousin a gift, it will alter our budget.
So, my question, since these couples are siblings and are very close to H and me (groom for the Sept wedding was one of our groomsmen) should we try to gift them roughly the same? Or do our original thought for the September wedding and some small token gift for the elopement? Another option I haven't thought of?
Where H and I are getting a little torn is that his other cousin (older brother to the wife above) is getting married early September. Ceremony, reception, they're registered, etc. H and I had agreed on a gift budget for this couple. But, if we want to give the eloping cousin a gift, it will alter our budget.
So, my question, since these couples are siblings and are very close to H and me (groom for the Sept wedding was one of our groomsmen) should we try to gift them roughly the same? Or do our original thought for the September wedding and some small token gift for the elopement? Another option I haven't thought of?
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Re: Gift for elopement?
"Halloween may have loose women scantily clad...
But Christmas has a pregnant virgin.
Way cooler." - anna.oskar
40/112
I agree with this, but if the situation is "we have X budget to spend on both gifts," I would avoid "punishing" the couple that eloped by dividing that budget unequally. If you are equally close to both couples and would've given each a gift of similar value had they both had a wedding and reception, then continue to do so regardless of the elopment.
If, however, you would not have given gifts of a similar value regardless of the elopment, don't feel obligated to do so just because these couples got married around the same time.
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[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Gift for elopement?:
I agree with this, but if the situation is "we have X budget to spend on both gifts," I would avoid "punishing" the couple that eloped by dividing that budget unequally. If you are equally close to both couples and would've given each a gift of similar value had they both had a wedding and reception, then continue to do so regardless of the elopment.
If, however, you would not have given gifts of a similar value regardless of the elopment, don't feel obligated to do so just because these couples got married around the same time.
Posted by StephBeanWed61502[/QUOTE]
This was my gut feeling as well, both cousins are very close and we would have given ourselves similar gift budgets for them. The elopement, naturally, came as a surprise, so we werent expecting it as part of our budget right now, but I think with moving some money around we can give lovely gifts to both couples.
Thanks for justifying my gut!
ETA: typos