I want to be alone the night before my wedding. I need serious time to de stress and I want to make sure my tiny doggies are looked after with as minimal an amount of stress as possible that evening and the morning of the wedding.(They are mean little doggies so I can't just hire a walker KWIM?)
The problem is my mom is going to freak out over this. She's been bringing it up now and I either just change the subject or pretend I didnt hear the comment.
If you've read my other posts, I have an interesting mother who may very well get drunk off her a*** the night before and make it interesting for me. I tend to drink way too much when I'm around her as a very unhealthy coping mechanisim, and I DO NOT need a hangover and puffy eyes on my wedding day. I am also bipolar and when I'm very stressed out small things can send me on a rampage which will end in me heading to bed for a day or two usually when I burn out.
I am afraid to tell her that I don't want to see her or anyone else that evening except my fur kids. She doesnt seem to get how bad my illness is, my sister has OCD and several other illnesses of that nature and until the last year has been quite sick and on the outside I am very high functioning, where my sister wasnt, so I do not get the attention, consideration and care that she did. Which is fine, as long as I am allowed to set my own boundries for my own health and sanity.
I know she is going to pretend to take it well and then I am going to have to deal with the drinking+ crazy phone calls+weirdo behaviour that I am just running out of reserves to deal with. This is a pattern of hers so I dont think it will change now.
I am wondering if I should ask my sister and MOH to explain to mom what is really going on with me medicallyemotionally and that she thinks its a good idea for me to stay by myself and get a good sleep the night before. I am more than capable of telling mom myself, but I feel the backlash might be less.
Are there anyother brides moms out there that have dealt with this sort of thing?? I know there is this tradition of going to the parents place but the very thought of it is upsetting. Its one more thing to throw off my routine, upset all my animals and make my life more difficult. How am I going to make it clear that I just can't be uprooted for one night to go sleep on a gnarly couch in a house that isnt mine without my FI, or my doggies? (I could bring them, but moms cat would get upset and urine all over everything like she did last time she saw my dogs)
My family and friends know about everything, but I feel like they think that with the wedding I am just going to be "normal" and that they can get away with treating me however they want to get their own wants met.
Frankly I am miserable and cannot wait for this wedding to be over so was can go back to our "real life"...My wedding is August 6 and all I can wait for is Aug 7th...:)