Wedding Etiquette Forum

Would it be ok...

...to ask a couple people to film certain parts of the wedding? I recently discovered companies (I'm looking at StoryMix Media) that send you a couple flip video cameras to use for the wedding, have you send the back the next day, and edit the video for you. 

I know my best friend would love to do this for part of the reception because she loves taking pics and video and was already planning on doing it. Would it be wrong to ask, say, my uncle to record the ceremony, and another family member to record the grand entrance/first dance?

I'm not concerned with logistics at this point, just the etiquette of asking people to film. Does this fall into the category of  "don't assign your guests crappy jobs?" TIA!


Re: Would it be ok...

  • I don't think it's rude, especially if I have an idea that someone will enjoy it.

    I typically find that people enjoy being part of things.

    I would give them a gift of some sort to thank them.
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    You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.
  • It's a fine line to walk, to be honest.  As long as you figure they'll be prone to doing that activity anyway, you can walk it without being rude.  However, don't expect high quality and get upset if it's not, make them get up and move around during the ceremony, or take up ANY of their time during the reception (that is their thank you gift for coming.  They are not to work under any circumstances during that time.)

    For example, I asked our roommate to videotape our ceremony for my grandparents, who couldn't make it due to health problems.  The tripod and camera was ours, and he was into videotaping as a hobby.  All he had to do is turn it.  Very minimal.  And in the end, he got caught up watching, and part of the video is out of focus.  We said not a word about it, and my grandmother got to see our wedding before she died because of his efforts.


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  • Ok great. I'll make sure I ask people who would probably be taping anyway. 

    There will be 3 cameras, so I can give out one for ceremony (to be taken from the person's seat) and one for the entrance/first dance, and one to BF. After that, I can have people casually mention that the cameras are around if anyone wants to take some video.

    The reception situation will be ok because back when I was talking to my best friend about vidographers (and how we're not having one), she said, "Well I can take some video!" I said, "No, you can come and have fun and not have any job to do." Her response was, "Ok I understand that. But can I take videos anyway?" (This is the same girl who volunteered to take our engagement pics, spent two hours taking them and 3 hours going through them with us to choose the best ones. She loves that stuff it's a hobby for her).So she has actually already volunteered to do this. She's also super competitive, so she'll be in her glory trying to get the "best" video clips.

     If it comes out great, then great, but if I get a bunch of video of people's rear ends or nothing interesting, I'll be prepared for that too. 

    I'm glad there's a polite way to do this as long as I stay on the right side of that line.  I was a little bummed about not having any video of our wedding and now it seems I can go an alternate route and have one! They also have a mobile app so anyone can take video on their phone and upload it too!

    I like the idea of buying a gift for the people I ask to record!

    Once again thank you for taking the time to respond, I really appreciate it!
  • Salsera29Salsera29 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited March 2013
    Ok I will definitely figure out who the camera geeks are and ask them. I'm so glad I can do this, I was afraid it was one of those new trendy things that seems like a good idea but is actually rude. I'm so excited!
  • Hello fellow July bride! FYI I just got a groupon for flip a hit and its half off. I purchased it in the nj groupons. It's 249 for 5 hd cameras.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-it-be-ok?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:4afc9855-7016-49fb-86f0-97da2fbb658bPost:3f794fd4-0818-4828-b11d-a4869512ea00">Re: Would it be ok...</a>:
    [QUOTE] For example, I asked our roommate to videotape our ceremony for my grandparents, who couldn't make it due to health problems.  The tripod and camera was ours, and he was into videotaping as a hobby.  All he had to do is turn it.  Very minimal.  And in the end, he got caught up watching, and part of the video is out of focus.  We said not a word about it, and my grandmother got to see our wedding before she died because of his efforts.
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

    Just out of curiosity, did you stream it or send her the tape to watch later? My grandmother can not make the trip to Boston and I feel sad that she is not able to watch me get married. I was thinking of streaming it but she doesn't even own a computer but she does own a DVD machine. I wonder if I can record it and burn it to a DVD?
  • As someone who is a professional graphic designer and asked many times to help friends by designing wedding stuff for them as a "favor" as in for free, or "to be able to use in my portfolio" even though I have 10 years of Graphic Design experience, my advice is that you make sure they want to do that and are truelly happy to do that for you. I'm sure they will, as I was happy to help my friends, but there are some things you will have to take into consideration:

    1) It's still work no matter how you look at it. Yes I love design and I am artistic which is why I chose the field that I am in, but at the same time that doesn't mean I always want to give up my free time to do free work. So whoever you ask to help you with this, please be considerate of their free time and that they are doing you a favor.

    2) Like someone mentioned above, they are not your vendors and should be treated as such as in, more leniency, don't be too choosy or bossy. Also, if something comes up in their life, they may put that over editing your project. If you want to tighten the restraints or have tight deadlines, then these people need some sort of professional compensation.

    3) If something is not "perfect" again remember you are not paying these people so as long as it's not sloppy or poor quality cut them some slack.

    Anyway I hope this doesn't come off as harsh or bossy, but I'm just sharing my thoughts based on my experience with doing things for friends, and there were points I'd get super stressed out and if I couldn't deliver within their impossible deadlines - they'd get pissy with me almost as if they were holding our friendship hostage = BIG PROBLEM. FYI As soon as possible is NOT a due date, this was what caused said problem. If you need something done by a specific time, then give that specific date and time so that friend or family member knows what they are looking at.
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