Irishbride

Tygress_Luv111908 · November 2010

Hi somehow something i was posting to my month board ended up here. I have no idea how that happened. Could you please just delete it from your board?

Thanks!

clearheavens · November 2010

I don't think she visits this board anymore, but she has let the knot gods know that she's "no longer fit to be moderator" as she puts it.

Tygress_Luv111908 · November 2010

Oh. Well thanks for the heads up!! So anyone that sees my message below just ignore it!

And good luck to you all in your planning!.

Calypso1977 · November 2010

are we getting a new mod?

clearheavens · November 2010

I hope so. I don't know who, though. How does it work? Can anyone do it or do we vote for it, etc.?

Calypso1977 · November 2010

not sure... they've changed mods a few times on Etiquette... dont know how the folks who got it got it, unless the outgoing mod suggested someone. i dont remember any "campaigning".

Tygress_Luv111908 · November 2010

I can help you out with that! I am MOD of my local board. All i had to do was email the KNOT Gods (moderators@theknot.com) and tell them that i wanted to take over the moderator position from the girl who was stepping down and why i wanted it. And poof i was the new MOD. There was some paperwork that i had to fill out but nothing to terrible. Just basically tells you all the rules of TK.

Calypso1977 · November 2010

clear heavens, do you know for certain that Irish wants to step down?

clearheavens · November 2010

From: IrishBrideND

Joined on 01-11-2007

401,499 Points

Re: Catholic Board

sorry! I don't go to the knot anymore since the format change. Its just too hard to use. I stay on the nest/bump

I've told the knot gods that I'm not a good fit for mod over there. Hopefully they will make a change soon.

Posted: 10-13-2010 at 5:24 PM

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DFWIndian · November 2010

Email Knot Annie ajones@theknot.com She will change it!!!

clearheavens · November 2010

Hm, now the question is, who wants to be mod? Calypso1977? KatieAnne18? agapecarrie? mica178?

A mod for this board must be pretty level and word answers so they're proposals of church teachings, not an imposition, so we can carry the spirit of charity to all who come here. A mod also has to be resourceful, knowledgeable, and be faithful to the Church. It's not easy. It really calls for two mods: one mod to answer questions concerning Church teaching, another mod to answer questions on the canonical laws of marriage, or something like that. I don't think one person can handle it all.

Who's gonna contact the knot gods?

agapecarrie · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_irishbride-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:d4a44a03-2a46-43e3-a12c-0a1945a72909Post:e4f46248-609b-4588-ad6f-91001003f15d">Re: **Irishbride**</a>:
[QUOTE]Hm, now the question is, who wants to be mod? Calypso1977 ? KatieAnne18 ? agapecarrie ? mica178 ? A mod for this board must be pretty level and word answers so they're proposals of church teachings, not an imposition, so we can carry the spirit of charity to all who come here. A mod also has to be resourceful, knowledgeable, and be faithful to the Church. It's not easy. It really calls for two mods : one mod to answer questions concerning Church teaching, another mod to answer questions on the canonical laws of marriage, or something like that. I don't think one person can handle it all. Who's gonna contact the knot gods?
Posted by clearheavens[/QUOTE]

Isn't a moderator supposed to just make sure forum rules are followed?

Just Thinking out loud about this: I would not want a moderator of a catholic board answering questions that were not in line with church teaching, because somehow the "mod" status would make it seem like their answers are official.

Is the mod really expected to be that knowledgable about all things Catholic and answer questions like that? or are they just here to keep things civil?

I wouldn't have a problem sharing the job--- as long as I know what is expected of me. I would never answer anything against church teaching.

mica178 · November 2010

I can't pretend to be nearly at the level of knowledge as Calypso or agapecarrie. I wouldn't mind helping to keep things civil if there was another moderator who could answer the more specific canonical questions, although it is fun getting into passionate debates over issues! I remember Dani from E stepping down as moderator specifically because the moderator duties were tough to maintain on a personal level.

Riss91 · November 2010

I don't think the mod should be the "answer" person. Just someone who can keep their cool, be polite, welcoming and fair. They need to be able to clearly and calmly attend to inapproprate behavior.

It might even be better if it weren't the most knowledgable people. Because those are likely the ones that will be involved in the most heated discussions. Better to have a more neutral party. Just my perspective :-)

One of the boards I am on has a very biased mod and it bothered me enough that I don't frequent the board anymore.

I do think we should start coming up with "sticky" ideas regarding the most asked questions.

Calypso1977 · November 2010

yes, the mod isnt an answer person. they are just supposed to enforce rules, clean up double posts, put out PSAs and the like. i know there are some club boards with "psycho mods" who try to police, ban people. etc.

i am a big believer in free speech so i dont want a mod that's going to ban people willy nilly when there is disagreement on here. for example, there was a lot of stuff in agape's thread abut IVF that was somewhat offensive, but again, was it really ban worthy?

i think overall, we're a pretty civil board. i think any of us could mod and we wouldnt really have too many big issues. we've essentially been mod-less for awhile now and nothings blown up yet.

clearheavens · November 2010

Hm, good point, ladies!

Well, I vote for agapecarrie for sure. I admire her writing style and the way she answers. And anyone else who can also maintain a free speech environment, yet offer the Church's view as a proposal if needed, that would be great! imo, someone like mica178 or Riss91 who are married and have gone through it before, would be a great choice.

The rest of us can chime in!

agapecarrie · November 2010

I did not intend my thread to become what it was...I couldn't believe it--- had I known it would have become it, I wouldnt' have started that thread. that is the only one I've ever started I think. I was so distrought after reading what I read that I had to post something, and it turned into that ridiculousness. I promise I was not looking to start anything.

The thing is, all I did was state church teaching, and talk about generic behavior. I never once commented on the state of any person's soul, nor link to the thread or name anyone in particular...I was not "spreading hate" as I was accused.

but I digress....

I would not have banned anyone--- but I would have given warnings.

bibliophile2010 · November 2010

I agree that the mod should be someone who can speak accurately on Church teachings, but doesn't have to be the answer person. Speaking of, I also agree that whoever the new mod is should put up a sticky or two to factually address the FAQs (Weddings outside of churches, the breakdown of mass/celebration, when it's a sacrament, wedding between Catholics, Catholic and a baptized person, Catholic and non-Catholic, something about communion for non-Catholics, etc.).

I lean toward Mica or Riss, but I'm cool with anyone mentioned. The only concern I'd have is if another situation like the IVF thread came up and somehow that affected the mod, or the board negatively. I know I was really really saddened by that whole situation and felt terribly for (and terribly proud of) Agape, and the other girls who were in there fighting for the faith. I just wonder if the mod should be the strongest voice if anything like that ever comes up again.

clearheavens · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_irishbride-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:d4a44a03-2a46-43e3-a12c-0a1945a72909Post:68f0f416-cc52-495a-a814-8ffbc2717a92">Re: **Irishbride**</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree that the mod should be someone who can speak accurately on Church teachings, but doesn't have to be the answer person. Speaking of, I also agree that whoever the new mod is should put up a sticky or two to factually address the FAQs (Weddings outside of churches, the breakdown of mass/celebration, when it's a sacrament, wedding between Catholics, Catholic and a baptized person, Catholic and non-Catholic, something about communion for non-Catholics, etc.). I lean toward Mica or Riss, but I'm cool with anyone mentioned. The only concern I'd have is if another situation like the IVF thread came up and somehow that affected the mod, or the board negatively. <strong>I know I was really really saddened by that whole situation and felt terribly for (and terribly proud of) Agape, and the other girls who were in there fighting for the faith. I just wonder if the mod should be the strongest voice if anything like that ever comes up again.</strong>
Posted by bibliophile2010[/QUOTE]

<div>That also summarizes how I feel, too, I felt absolutely terrible for agapecarrie, mica, and all those who suffered from it. I regret I came too late to help. But no one could ever have predicted it would get so ridiculous like that.</div><div>
</div><div>From that experience--mica, riss, and agapecarrie--do you think you could calm down such a storm should it happen again? Assuming one or all of you are ok with being mod? I'm confident you ladies could. But I wanted to ask before we submit a new mod proposal over to the knot.</div>

Riss91 · November 2010

The IVF thread was horrendous. And not because of our lovely, knowledgable and passionate Catholic knotties. But because everything quickly became so hostile. Knotties coming here just to mudsling and accuse without offering the same level of understanding that they expected us to provide. Agape, I also felt so horrible that the intention of your post - to pray for these souls - was ripped to shreds by those who decided to interpret your words as an insult or a personal attack to them. It was really upsetting.

My personal opinion is that we can all do a better job of explaining the Church's teachings in a warmer, more welcoming, less accusatory way. We get bombarded with people who really, quite honestly disrespect our church. "I want to get married outside. Can't I just get my marriage blessed later, so I can avoid doing anything inconvenient that the Church requires?". It's really difficult to be polite and coddle them into understanding, but that's the best way to open their eyes.

We'll never get through to any of those people, we'll never alter their pessimistic views of the Church by alienating them further. Or by being an example of the stereotype of Catholics that pushed them away from the Church in the first place. If we want more people to understand the Church and to think better of it (and its followers), we need to respond to them in a way that doesn't add to their fodder. It's hard to keep your temper when you're passionate and someone is demeaning your faith, but you catch more bees with honey, right? Though I'm not certain why anyone would want to catch bees....hmmm...? Anyway...

I know that this thread has nothing to do with what I just mentioned, but for a few months, I needed to step back from posting and just lurked on this board because I felt that the message was being spread in a negative rather than constructive manner (and I was guilty of this as well). I thought the tone and manner of some of the replies was demeaning to the OP, and thought we're never going to open their eyes that way. You can know every fact and figure, but if your method of sharing the information causes those recieving it to shut off from you, the message never goes anywhere. We weren't being the best examples of the message we were trying to share. I needed a short break to reflect on that. Hopefully, we can all improve in our method of communication in the future.

Any of the ladies mentioned in this thread would be excellent moderators, no doubt.

Calypso1977 · November 2010

excellent points, Riss.

my "vote" if you will is for Riss. id be happy to co-mod with Riss if she wants to be a mod and if she wants a co-mod.

the only other person i thought of was possibly Ring Pop only because she has mod experience (she was a mod over on E for awhile). no clue if she'd want to do it again, although this board is alot quieter than E.

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