New York-Long Island

help! MIL from hell

omg God will have to give me the strength of a saint to deal with this MIL. lets start off by explaining that his parents are paying for 2/3 of the wedding and my dad is paying 1/3. but since they are paying a majority she believes that it gives her control for every part of the wedding. lets start with the main problem. i am sending out the save the dates cards because i have alot of family and friends out of town. most of his family are close to town, but regardless, i was planning on sending out the cards for everybody because that the classy thing to do. i was also planning to incorporate my registry information with the cards because i knew that i could not send them with the actual invitations. apparently his parents blew a gasket on the whole issue especially the issue of the registry. they do not want us to register at all because they never did that for theyre wedding.... well guess what? in 1985 there were no such things as registry duh!. so they are not going to tell anybody from his family about the registry. that was a pretty large fight so we just left it as i would send out save the dates but not include the registry information for his side of the family. just talked to his mother and apparently she is holding the addresses hostage until the invitations.
in other news, with regards to the photography, we already put down a deposit for the photographer that she wanted and she was the one that set up the package details. its been 4 months and i still havent met the photographer of MY wedding. she starts explaing the details of the package and adding in that if me and my fiance want to add anything in, we can pay for it ourselves(we are both students which is why they are paying for it). she also said that even though my dad is giving money for the wedding, he should pay for his parent album. absolutely ridiculous. flipping out

Re: help! MIL from hell

  • edited December 2011
    I don't know how much one can help with a situation like this... however, I can only offer a piece of advice.

    Techinally, at least from my knowledge, you aren't supposed to send out registry information. You can however direct people to your wedding website - where oops your registry is posted. It's quite forward to send out the registry info, but if people are crafty enough they'll find it.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • alithebridealithebride member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    edited December 2011
    there was registry info in 85. i was 10. it existed.
    and they're right-you DONT put registry info in with STD.
    they're also right that they're paying and they get to decide things. if you don't want it their way-pay yourself. if you cant you see where it gets you.

     

  • LuvOBLuvOB member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Questions: why would you include a registry on the save the date?  Shouldnt the registry be with the bridal shower invitation, if you are having one?
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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