Addressing invites to your adviser - grad students?

sarah0725 · October 2010

I'm planning on inviting my adviser and probably at least one other professor to my wedding. I know that Emily Post says that you don't use "Dr." on an invitation unless you're inviting medical doctors, because using it for academics is pretentious, but what if that academic happens to be a person in authority on your dissertation? I'm on first-name basis with my professors most of the time, but addressing a formal invite to them as "Ms." seems beyond bizarre to me.

If you invited a professor to your wedding, what did you do?

squirrly · October 2010

You use Dr. in the mailing address. It's on the actual invitation itself that it doesn't belong - like YOUR doctorate or your FI's or your parents, if their name is on the invite.

sarah0725 · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_addressing-invites-adviser-grad-students?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:eca9585e-2f54-4b85-b84a-8d27fcdd68d9Post:e2e50569-732e-4f45-8407-4684790fdc8c">Re: Addressing invites to your adviser - grad students?</a>:
[QUOTE]You use Dr. in the mailing address. It's on the actual invitation itself that it doesn't belong - like YOUR doctorate or your FI's or your parents, if their name is on the invite.
Posted by squirrly[/QUOTE]

Ah cool that makes sense. Well, that's one weird problem solved! Now I get to employ the "Dr. and Mr." construction, which is one of my favorites. :)

squirrly · October 2010

Go forth and address!

We had all kinds of strange ones, with all the military ranks. My favorites are people with multiple titles. A PhD, a pastor, and a military rank, all on the same person.

And, H desperately wanted me to use the abbreviations of the military titles (1LT, SGT, etc.) instead of the words, because that's what he uses in emails at work. Ugh.

It's always something, right?

sarah0725 · October 2010

I think I only have Ph.Ds - no other weird ranks. Thank goodness!

And I just noticed that you've now upgraded to a raspberry-sized baby - congratulations!

ewurgler · October 2010

Definitely do Dr.

My FI just got his PhD and I am a grad student, so there will be lots of PhDs at the wedding. Dr. will go on all of them.

artbyallie · October 2010

I have to say, Emily Post must be offending a lot of people with this one. If I had a doctoral degree of any variety, I would want that to be recognized. It's a lot of work! I know my fiancé feels the same way--he's planning for a Ph.D. in Creative Writing.

Kristin789 · October 2010

DH and I both have doctorates, and our mail comes to The Doctors Smith.

If only the husband has a doctorate:
Dr. and Mrs. Kurt Smith

If only the wife has a doctorate:
Dr. Jane Smith and Mr. Kurt Smith
(not Dr. and Mr. Kurt Smith)

thesuninherhead · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_addressing-invites-adviser-grad-students?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:eca9585e-2f54-4b85-b84a-8d27fcdd68d9Post:4c0808ad-6c58-4a57-8d25-ecb910179081">Re: Addressing invites to your adviser - grad students?</a>:
[QUOTE]DH and I both have doctorates, and our mail comes to The Doctors Smith. If only the husband has a doctorate: Dr. and Mrs. Kurt Smith If only the wife has a doctorate: Dr. Jane Smith and Mr. Kurt Smith (not Dr. and Mr. Kurt Smith)
Posted by Kristin789[/QUOTE] Aww, you break my heart Kirsten! I was looking forward to receiving mail addressed to Dr and Mr K next year!

Addressing invites to your adviser - grad students?

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