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maid problem

wsweidawsweida
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in Moms and Maids
removed to wedding party board

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Re: maid problem

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    PeonyPrincesskddPeonyPrincesskdd
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_maid-problem?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:a83372dd-2dc1-483b-ba16-50ed785a76dePost:e9c0142f-b128-4943-8022-39ac87d282de">Maid Problem</a>:
    [QUOTE]So here is my delima, I have a bridesmaid who I invited to be a maid over a year ago since then she has only attended 1 pre wedding event, canceling all the others the day of.  I understand that she lives about 2 hours away so I know it is a distance but she canceled attending my bridal shower that day and now can't come to my bachlorette party (which the date was picked to help her schedule) and has to leave the reception early.  I was willing to forget all of that and work around it so I made plans with just her , which she cancelled again.  I know she is busy but my wedding is just under 2 months away and I don't know if I can rely on her to attend.  It is causing stress on my relationship with my HTB and all the other maids.  She has already purchased the dress and shoes.  I have tried talking to her about it and now she wont even answer my calls.  What do I do?
    Posted by wsweida[/QUOTE]

    Bridesmaids do not need to attend pre-wedding events esp since you said she lives over 2 hours away. 
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    BeeBee22BeeBee22 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    She won't answer your calls because you're pestering her.  It's very bad manners to repeatedly cancel the day of, but it sounds as if either she's not in control of her schedule or she says she can come to keep the peace, when actually she can't/doesn't want to.

    Let her be.  She doesn't need to be at any of these events, and she probably cancelled your get-together because she LIVES 2 HOURS AWAY and knew it would be all about the wedding.  

    If she has the dress and shoes, she'd done. It sounds like she plans to attend. If she can't, you'll have uneven sides, which is of no concern. There's no reason that this should be causing stress to your bridal party.
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    awolfe2awolfe2 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That sounds like no fun, and definitely frustrating. In the end, you can't control her behavior, so I would just treat her as you would the other bridesmaids- let them know the time they need to be there for the ceremony and let the other stuff go.
    Her flaking out last minute is definitely a bummer, but it's only a reflection of her lack of planning and not yours.
    Enjoy your day with the people who will be there, and don't worry about those who are not!
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    joiner521joiner521
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am not sure if you see it, but she is JEALOUS!!!!
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