addressing kids

jayhess · June 2010

Okay so a few days ago i asked how to address invites but I didn't ask when you address Mr. and Mrs Smith can i just invite kids or should I just put The Smith Family (note some people have 3 + kids so I don't want to write each and every kids name) Thanks

aerinpegadrak · June 2010

If you just write "The Smith Family," you risk someone presuming that Great Aunt Myrtle and her five kids all fall under that listing. It's really best to write the names of each person on the envelope.

banana468 · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_addressing-kids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:33dc71b5-f2ed-41c1-8dc5-1e1c2a6c58a4Post:fc7e3af4-7ee7-4af5-b1a1-bb094f9c1274">Re: addressing kids</a>:
[QUOTE]I think you can just put Mr. and Mrs. Bob Turner and family or and children. Names don't need to be written out. My parents were invited to a wedding of a friend of the family and my name wasn't on the envelope so I knew I wasn't invited. Had it said though, and family, I wouldn't think that my WHOLE family was invited. Even if someone accidentally rsvps that, you make the "sorry our invitation was confusing" call. I don't see an issue with "and family" or "and children"
Posted by fallingwater[/QUOTE]

This is completely incorrect.

If you want people to attend, you invite them by name.

fallingwater · June 2010

You do realize it says, "I think" right, banana? Which means its my opinion and opinions can't be wrong. What about the family that has 7 kids? My envelopes arent that freakin big and it would look trashy.

squirrly · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_addressing-kids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:33dc71b5-f2ed-41c1-8dc5-1e1c2a6c58a4Post:f48feb82-1072-4bde-85ba-970bce178570">Re: addressing kids</a>:
[QUOTE]You do realize it says, "I think" right, banana? Which means its my opinion and opinions can't be wrong. What about the family that has 7 kids? My envelopes arent that freakin big and it would look trashy.
Posted by fallingwater[/QUOTE]

When someone is asking a question with a concrete black and white answer, please take a moment to verify your advice or wait for someone else to answer.

You didn't actually state your opinion (I think it's terrible to do that! would be an opinion) - you stated your GUESS of what the etiquette rule is. Banana was correct. And, no matter how many kids, the answer is the same. Keep in mind that there is some flexibility:

Joshua, Michael, Caleb, Jake, Jordan, James and Jack
OR
Joshua, Michael, Caleb and Jake
Jordan, James and Jack

Also, if any of the children are over 18 (out of HS) and living at home, they should get a separate invitation anyway.

banana468 · June 2010

Ditto Squirrly.

DH's family is HUGE. I wrote down the name of EVERY child that we were inviting.

This actually isn't a matter of opinion. There is a right and wrong way to address an envelope. Not naming people BY their names is incorrect.

Sing2phins · June 2010

Are we talking about the outer or inner envelope here? Because my understanding was that the outer envelope could be to Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Family, so long as the inner envelope included the names of all of the people invited, i.e.

Mr. John Smith
Mrs. Susan Smith
Jack Smith
Jason Smith
Sarah Smith

etc. Is that not correct?

jayhess · June 2010

Yes Im talking about the outer envelop so i should include everyone name or don't need to? im confused on which answer was for the outer envelope thanks ladies!

squirrly · June 2010

"and family" is inappropriate on either envelope.

Outter: Mr. and Mrs. John Doe
James, Karen, and Samuel

Inner : Mr. and Mrs. Doe
James, Karen, and Samuel

banana468 · June 2010

Ditto Squirrly 100%.

mef1183 · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_addressing-kids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:33dc71b5-f2ed-41c1-8dc5-1e1c2a6c58a4Post:9cdc7c31-c6ab-4f39-bb2f-ad8bdb7a04a4">Re: addressing kids</a>:
[QUOTE]"and family" is inappropriate on either envelope. Outter: Mr. and Mrs. John Doe James, Karen, and Samuel Inner : Mr. and Mrs. Doe James, Karen, and Samuel
Posted by squirrly[/QUOTE]

Should each child be listed on a separate line on the outer envelope?

Mr. and Mrs. John Doe
Mr. James Doe
Ms. Karen Doe
Mr. Samuel Doe

I know I've read somewhere that the "and" implies marriage.

squirrly · June 2010

On second/third lines "and" doesn't equate to marriage. It's acceptable to do them either way - it depends more on spacing issues than anything else.

sexymander · June 2010

I doubt I'll write out every childs name in my family. For as long as I can remember my entire family has always just written and family after my parents names on invites or cards. With my family though we understand that and family refers to the children in the household.

addressing kids

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