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Moms and Maids
jennifersmith222
member
MOB wants to wear THIS:
My mother has picked out a dress for my wedding next September...from Victoria's Secret!
She will be almost 52 at the time and has a track record of dressing like she's 22 (no bra, short shorts, etc.). I have told her nicely that I think it's too low cut and too short (underneath, there is a solid lining that barely hits mid-thigh) and even suggested similar, more appropriate MOB dresses, but she is determined to order it. She says that if she orders a size bigger, it will be longer and she can have it taken in. I think it's completely inappropriate. She has also mentioned that if she has a hard time walking on the grass in her heels, she is planning on going barefoot! I want her to look sophisticated and age appropriate, especially since this is will be the first encounter my fiance's family will have with her (and that's a whole 'nother story) Help!
Thanks for giving me some perspective, girls. 
I don't want to tell her what to wear per se, but rather prevent anyone from talking smack on my momma! But when all is said and done, the only things that will matter at the end of the day are that I'm marrying my best friend and everyone had a great time.
I don't want to tell her what to wear per se, but rather prevent anyone from talking smack on my momma! But when all is said and done, the only things that will matter at the end of the day are that I'm marrying my best friend and everyone had a great time. This discussion has been closed.
Re: MOB wants to wear THIS:
Your wedding is a year away, still, your mom might change her mind many times before then.
[QUOTE]I'd suggest you convince her not to waste the money on alterations, ordering it a size bigger will NOT make it longer
Posted by Kate61487[/QUOTE]
<div>It might - I'm heavy but short, so it's a real problem for me, but some styles are cut longer as they get larger (although even then the difference going one size up is minimal.) The problem is that longer means longer everywhere - including the neckline. And a small difference in the depth of the neckline is usually more noticable than a small difference in hemline length.</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: MOB wants to wear THIS: : It might - I'm heavy but short, so it's a real problem for me, but some styles are cut longer as they get larger (although even then the difference going one size up is minimal.) The problem is that longer means longer everywhere - including the neckline. And a small difference in the depth of the neckline is usually more noticable than a small difference in hemline length.
Posted by RaptorSLH[/QUOTE]
I just figured since the item description defines the length as 19" from waist they probably won't change that as the size goes up.
I think my favorite part is that the lining is fully detachable; sexy...
I would be pissed if my mom wore that. I think you should be able to tell her in someway that she can find a better outfit.
June 2012 April Siggy Challenge: Rings
Your mother sounds like mine...the more you disagree with her the more she sticks to her opinion. The more she knew I didn't like something, the more she wanted to do it. I agree with one of the PPs - your wedding is a ways off. Just stop talking about it and hopefully she'll change her mind. Good luck...
I actually think. In all honesty, that my cousins aunt wore this to my cousins wedding (her aunt, on the other side of the family). Her aunt and mom never got along (its her mom's, brothers wife if that makes sense). So I tink she did it to "stick it to" my aunt.
But as it got warmer throughout the night, and we were dancing. she took the lace part off and just wore the dress.
Poeple just talked and whispered to each other about how skanky she looked. She wore it with flip flops. It didn't reflect ont eh bride at all. It reflected poorly on teh one that made the decision to wear the skanky dress.
Let your mom wear it. When are you getting married? If its not in the summer maybe you can suggest she wear tights.
I have to give credit to your mom for wearing VS clothes. I can't even squeeze my fat a$$ into their clothing anymore it runs so small. and short.
167 Invited
AKA GoodLuckBear14
I would tell her she has to find something else.
Posted by joysyear[/QUOTE]
<div>Does that actually work for you? Because my mom certainly doesn't let me give her orders when she has her heart set on something, and it doesn't sound like OP's mom does either.</div>
I would play the 'it's my big day and it would mean a lot to me if we could pick your dress together.' Take her on a just you and her shopping trip.
However, I fear there is really nothing you can do. You can ask her if she is really sure, and I think that is as far as you can go.
[QUOTE]Your mother wants to go to your wedding BAREFOOT and you're complaining about the dress? Forget about victoria's secret, buy her some flats first! Tell her you're concerned for her safety and you don't want her to have to go to the ER on your wedding day because of some broken glass of the dance floor, or whatever. I judge brides who want to dictate their mother's clothing big time (sorry!), but if my mom attended my non-beachwedding barefoot, I'd be pretty upset!
Posted by Elinetrouwt[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Don't be sorry! I asked for opinions. :) I am definitely concerned about her going barefoot, and I am already planning on bringing her flats to wear if she tries to go barefoot. Like I've said before, I don't want to tell her what to wear, I just was asking for other brides' opinions as to whether it's inappropriate or not so I know how to handle it. No offense taken. :)
</div>
[QUOTE]Hijack her credit card? Hide her catalogues? Disable her internet? Maybe just tell her that instead of ordering it, <strong>you saw a similar one in a store somewhere and she should go with you to try it on. When it's gone, convince her to try on something else. The length may not be as bad if it wasn't also low-cut. Maybe she's concerned about looking frumpy, so try to steer her towards a dress that's at least just one or the other - long but showing some cleavage or short but high-necked.</strong>
Posted by sarafoley98[/QUOTE]
This
I am in my thirties, could actually pull off the dress that the MOB wants to wear and wouldn't even consider it. It's designed for a woman in her early twenties for a date night. I also won't wear the vast majority of what is sold in department stores because their buyers are shopping with baby boomer women and millennial women and girls in mind. In other words, none of it is age appropriate for me. Thank God for Ann Taylor.
AKA GoodLuckBear14
[QUOTE]What's relevant to this situation, Jessica, is that her mother is still here, still a mentally competent woman, and doesn't need her daughter to order her around. Are you with me so far? She can dislike the dress, but that's the limit of her entitlement. Does this make sense? Brides can only tell the wedding party what to wear. Everyone else is off limits. I don't see much difference between the VS dress and some of the stuff at Ann Taylor. LET THIS GO. What the MOB wears is on her, not the couple.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]
Wow. I haven't seen you this condescending in a while.
Nobody said that OP's mother is mentally incompetent or that her daughter should order her around. Jessica's only mistake was believing anything the TK tells her and quoting it. We've had many new brides on here who have made the same mistake. No need for the holier than thou overreaction.
and as for Ann Taylor, I really don't think you've ever once set foot in any of their stores. It's the clothing that I usually pull out of my closet for work - as an attorney.
AKA GoodLuckBear14