Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?

melanieky · August 2012

A few people have told me that the bride and groom barely eat or don't get to eat at all during the reception. This is disappointing to me because FI and I picked out food that we both really like and really want to eat.

What do you guys think? Do the bride and groom get to eat? How about those of you who already had your weddings, did you eat your meal?

Brandi0714 · August 2012

We had the venue make us up a plate and we made it a point to spend enough time at our table to eat before making our rounds to the other tables.

Kristin789 · August 2012

I have never been to someone else's wedding where the bride and groom got to eat the dinner - they were out doing table visits during the mealtime.

Our wedding was very different in that regard, so I'll describe what we did in case you want to use this example. It's not the right thing for everyone - maybe you really won't want to do this - but here is what we did:

FI and I and my mom and my friend Debbie got to the ceremony+reception location an hour early and finished the set-up on the tables. FI had picked up the cake and the flowers, so we set up the cake and pinned on the flowers, etc.

Then as people arrived, we greeted them ourselves.

FI was in the suit he would wear for the ceremony and I was in a purple shirt and white pants.

And we greeted each person / family ourselves. And in between people arriving, we did table visits and chatted with everyone.

Then about 10 minutes before the ceremony would start, I stepped out, put on my dress, and then came back into the room.

We did the ceremony, then we had two blessings, then the meal was served and we DID sit there and eat the meal, because we had already talked to every single person at least once.

rsanna · August 2012

I always find it odd to hear about people not getting to eat at their wedding, but it makes sense. My sister got to eat at her wedding, but that was because everyone was refusing to eat until they sat down and ate first.

gurrlballa10 · August 2012

We, for sure, ate. That was the one thing that I knew was going to happen. I didn't care if I was eating when people were dancing, but I was going to eat. We did all of our pictures before hand except for family pictures. Those took approximately 10 minutes. We were in the reception when it started, did our table visits during cocktail hour, and then sat down and ate when dinner came out. Our coordinator even put a plate of the apps together for us, since we didn't get any.

TaraMc728 · August 2012

We ate. Our caterer brougth our plates to us before opening the buffet. People still came and talked to us while we were eating, but I made sure I ate. We did out table visits after dinner, since we did a recieving line after the ceremony.

marriedfilingjointly · August 2012

We made sure we were able to eat. I think for a lot of people your photographer has a lot to do with it. Our pictures were very photo-journalistic and organic; we only did posed pictures for 20-30 minutes, so we had plenty of time to enjoy our reception AND greet our guests at their tables. Our caterer also packed to-go boxes for us to take home and we ate the leftovers for breakfast before we left on our honeymoon.

MrsKathyC · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_bride-groom-not-eating-during-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:e0d36282-6c2b-4e0a-8ff3-b857a1edff0cPost:0c16249b-ce64-41c8-824c-6139abcccd35">Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]We ate. <strong>Our caterer brougth our plates to us before opening the buffet. People still came and talked to us while we were eating, but I made sure I ate. We did out table visits after dinner, </strong>.
Posted by TaraMc728[/QUOTE]

This is how ours went as well. And let's not forget cake! I made sure to have some cake!

marriedfilingjointly · August 2012

That sucks, Linger. DH was in a wedding like that. I got to hang out with him for the last 45 minutes of the reception, and he didn't get to eat. We stopped and got burgers on the way back to our hotel.

direy25 · August 2012

We were able to eat a decent amount of the meal but the only cake we had was during the cake cutting. I'm still bummed about that, our cake was delicious.

marriedfilingjointly · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_bride-groom-not-eating-during-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:e0d36282-6c2b-4e0a-8ff3-b857a1edff0cPost:9f2d7e1c-c0d7-4c22-afa6-2dd24276c87e">Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]I really wished we had passed fast food on our way home so we didn't have to actually cook when we got there. I just wanted to go to sleep but I was starving. At least we didn't put our WP through it. When we got to the reception their jobs were done.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

<div>No bridal party dance? You are like, super bride. </div>

Maggie0829 · August 2012

H and I ate. We were both starving and we loved the food we picked so we definitely wanted to eat. The wait staff came over to us and asked us what we would like prior to out stations opening so we were the first to be served. H and I took our time and really enjoyed our food because we knew it would be the one and only time we would have to sit and not be bombarded by all of our guests.

I would make sure that you and your FI make time to sit and actually enjoy your reception, even if it is only for 30 minutes. You have put a lot of planning into it and I know a reception is a thank you to guests but you and your FI should be able to enjoy it as well.

HobokensFury · August 2012

Here is what I ate: 2 quarter size crab cakes, 3 chicken wings, a piece of cheese, a bite of steak, a spoon of potatoes and a bite of cake (the one he fed me). That's all. DH ate very little as well exceept he has a few pieces of sushi. We didn't have time to eat.

GoodLuckBear14 · August 2012

We ate but not together. We had a cocktail reception, made up plates for ourselves at the buffet and then I sat with my friends from Ohio and Phoenix and he sat with his friends from Phoenix and California. We hardly get to see these people so we were glad to have time to visit with them without being rushed.

GinaV0822 · August 2012

I have a feeling we may not have time to eat, but we are having either a nacho bar or sliders for our late night snack at the reception. It will help those who drank too much to get a little more food in their stomach, and it will help me and FI if we didn't get to eat our meal. Hopefully you'll get to enjoy the good food you picked out!

Avion22 · August 2012

We went through the buffet line first. I would have rather not done that, but at least we got food and were done eating in time to great people at their tables while they were eating. Also, our caterer packed us a "picnic basket" with some of the leftovers to take back to our hotel room so we could have a midnight snack if we felt like it. It was really sweet:-)

mrsrichard33 · August 2012

I dont get it... How could the bride and groom not eat??? What are they doing while everyone is eating?/?

We entered, went to our tables, MC said a few words then we started the buffett line with the head table then parents table then everyone else. While our guests were eating.. its a weird tihng BUT... we were eating toooo!!!

You go around and say hello to ppl after the dance starts. Not everyone is going to be dancing at the same time therefore make your way to the tables and say hello during the dance..

mrsrichard33 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_bride-groom-not-eating-during-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:e0d36282-6c2b-4e0a-8ff3-b857a1edff0cPost:d96f4b5e-2832-4ab9-b06d-7e653395cdb7">Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception? : We did the tables visits that you did during the dance during dinner!!!! We did this so we didn't have to keep going back to tables to say hi to someone who was on the dance floor the first time we went to the table!!!!!! We also were taking pictures because everyone wanted a picture with us!!!!!!!
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

I just do not get how going to a table and interupting their dinner is any better than going around and missing a few people. If their on the dance floor, their having a good time and you can catch them later or catch them on the dance floor yourself..

I cant imagine me trying to squeeze in and around everyones chairs to say a personal hello to everyone. Id much rather see them on the dance floor and say hello. Or, go around while cake is being served.

GoodLuckBear14 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_bride-groom-not-eating-during-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:e0d36282-6c2b-4e0a-8ff3-b857a1edff0cPost:3e7ce7d4-6490-4047-9fb5-620920d7e02f">Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception? : DH and I split up for most of the reception to visit with friends/family from OOT too. I think I spent more time with my friend from San Diego than I did DH at our wedding, lol.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

The only time I actually remember being with Chris is when my mom made us walk a perimeter greeting guests and when his cousin herded his entire family (now including me) into the drawing room for a family photo.

btw - YGPM

mrsrichard33 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_bride-groom-not-eating-during-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:e0d36282-6c2b-4e0a-8ff3-b857a1edff0cPost:8e2cbf82-4f6c-41d6-8064-925440affdc2">Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception? : Good for you. Most people don't do it the way you did, so acting as if it's unfathomable to you that anyone would do something differently than you would is crazy.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

Ive never heard of the bride and groom going around and interupting peoples dinner just to say hi thanks for coming.. Any wedding Ive ever been in, gone to or anything have done it this way. We didnt even think about what we should do.. I cant imagine paying so much money for dinner and not even getting to eat it. That would be a major p off. !

kaos16 · August 2012

I'm hoping that doing a first look will give us time to greet, thank and speak to all/most of our guests while mingling during cocktail hour, allowing us time to eat dinner before hitting the dance floor. . . . I get grumpy when I don't eat!

I hope that's not just wishful thinking

mrsrichard33 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_bride-groom-not-eating-during-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:e0d36282-6c2b-4e0a-8ff3-b857a1edff0cPost:bf9f15c6-8d65-45c3-9c09-39075b81488f">Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception? : I've only seen it done this way.
Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]

Weird how different regions do things differently.. interesting.

mrsrichard33 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_bride-groom-not-eating-during-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:e0d36282-6c2b-4e0a-8ff3-b857a1edff0cPost:f9907a22-1cd2-4a3d-85ee-c814828ccba4">Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating During Reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bride & Groom Not Eating Dur m.
Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]

Oh yah? They dont do recieving lines?? We didnt do a recieving line either. Would have taken too much time.

cwaggoner07 · August 2012

We did a first look, took almost all of our pics beforehand. After the ceremony a storm cloud rolled in (see below) so we took some pics that we didn't plan on but SO glad we did. Then we came in through the back door and went upstairs to eat, just H and I. Our coordinator had set up plates for us with our preferred drinks. It was SO nice to be together alone so soon after the ceremony and enjoy our food together (even though it was pretty rushed, we still were able to eat plenty).
Then we were announced, did our first dance and parent dances while everyone else was still eating, and then did table visits immediately after. We did not sit in our assigned seats even once.

ralbro · August 2012

H and I did sit down to eat after we were introduced and after the blessing. We were the first through the buffet and sat down to eat while everyone else was eating. We had a few people come up to us during dinner to say hi but we were able to eat. I didn't each THAT much because I was too excited, but H cleared his plate.

We did take the time to go table to table after the dancing started. We probably missed a few people who were standing at the bar or dancing, but we either talked to them when we went to the bar or out on the dance floor.

[Deleted User] · August 2012

DH and I were introduced and went right into our first dance... afterwards, our salads and drinks were waiting for us at our sweetheart table. We nibbled those a bit and they brought out our main courses while our guests were still receiving salads... so we were pretty much a course ahead of everyone. We did have a couple people come up to us while we were eating, but we still made the rounds to our 14 tables while everyone was eating. Our caterer did box up some to-go meals for us which were delicious around midnight when we got back to our room and realized how hungry we were.

MrsGandthebeag · August 2012

DH and I had 80 people at our wedding so we got to thank pretty much everyone during cocktail hour and hence didn't get any food then. But, we were able to eat our dinners and finish up the last of the visits between courses. I imagine it'd be tougher with more guests.

rlavach · August 2012

I hear different answers from everyone. Some don't eat because they didn't go get themselves food, some don't eat because they kept getting interrupted for pictures, some don't eat because the nerves make them loose their appetite.

We had none of those problems. My DOC asked me which foods we wanted to try (we had a buffet with 4 stations). She gave the orders to the wedding attendant who was like our personal waitress. She got us whatever we wanted all night, including bringing us cocktail hour food in our room. We had a sweetheart table & no one bothered us. We ate well.

I did get so caught up dancing that I only took a few bites of our cupcakes. No biggie, since we took like 10 home

ETA: Oh, and since we were served first, we had plenty of time left over to do the table rounds. Around here, you thank everyone during diner also. We also had a receiving line at the church.

divinemsbee · August 2012

We'll do a receiving line at the church if we can, everyone in my family does them so I'm not too worried, but I still doubt we'll get to eat all that much. One of the best things about the caterer we were looking at getting was that he would pre-pack a bridal picnic basket so that the bride and groom would get food later. Since we're self catering now I'm going to make sure that we have some food packed up for us to take.

My friend got married a few months ago and we were talking about her food and how good it was and she said that it was good, and since they had a very small wedding table visits didn't take much time, but she simply wasn't hungry then. The adrenaline just go to her and she ate a little meat and half a roll. She and her husband hit up the Whataburger near their hotel later that night.

samanthatyree · August 2012

Our plan is to get plates and sneak away while everyone is in the buffet line. After eating we will come back and visit. Our caterer is also packing us a to go box.

littleluckypenny · August 2012

We were served our meal first, before everyone else so we were able to finish first and start our table visits. Our guests actually let us eat and didn't come up to our table during the reception

The owner of the venue actually gave us a personal attendant who got us refills or got us anything we needed.

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