African American Weddings

Anyone else writing their own vows???

We have chose to write our own vows and I’m stuck…..I know how I feel about him I just don’t know how to put it in words and its not helping that we will be in front of a crowd saying them….and to make matters worse FI said he has been started and almost finished….Do you ladies have any advice on where I should start or just some good brain storming ideas???   

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Re: Anyone else writing their own vows???

  • edited December 2011
    WOW! You guys are getting started early! Or maybe I am just late...lol... FI and I plan to do both (say the traditional vows and write our own vows- I think) but I have not started writing them yet. I think I am going to wait until a little bit closer cause my mind is not even there right now, my words would probably not even flow right! Sorry I am no help! But I am sure you shouldn't worry as long as you are speaking/writing from your heart it will be BEAUTIFUL! And the crowd won't matter at all.


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  • msapril0730msapril0730 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    So my FI just sprung this on me earlier this week! I think we were watching David Tutera when he decided that we should write our own vows!! I'm going to wait til next month to write them once my brain is back on track!
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  • edited December 2011
    We're doing both traditional and our own vows as well.  We'll say our own vows first and then the traditional ones when we're exchanging rings.  I have NO idea what I'm going to say yet.  And FI isn't going to write his down, he's going to say what comes to heart at the moment.  That's the way he works though, he never writes anything down.  Sorry I can't give any good advice either, but I agree with the pp; as long as you say what's in your heart it'll be okay.  
  • hotrocker2011hotrocker2011 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thanks ladies i was starting to panic...I like to get a good jump start on everything if i don't then it i would put it off until the last minute
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  • destinee909destinee909 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My FH wants us to write our own vows... I don't know what to say. I was thinking of looking online to find some vows and tweaking them to make them personal. Is that wrong?
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  • edited December 2011
    We are doing our own vos as well! I don't know where to start either so you are not alone. I am good with words though. I think if you just sit down and concentrate on them for 30 minutes or so a day until you have them written, and say whats on your heart, you will have them done in no time. I would think to say why you fell in love and how you are thankful and if you are religious how God brought you together and etc....
  • edited December 2011
    We are doing part of our vows.  More like a statement to each other.  I am doing mine in spanish which will trip everyone out because when asked do I speak spanish (I have a spanish last name, as I am half puerto rican) I alway say I really dont speak spanish at all.  No one has ever heard me speak spanish before, not even my mom who is black or my FI... OK maybe my daughter when she did something really really bad and I cursed in spanish so she would not know what I was saying.. but other then that...no one has heard me speak spanish. I think it will shock everyone.  
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  • edited December 2011
    We are writing our own vows. I have started on mines and is almost finished. I am sure that he has not started on his!
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  • edited December 2011
    I am writing mine!! my advice is to pray and write from your heart!!
  • edited December 2011
    we wrote our own vows.  you have a while to go, so don't stress.  just write down some initials thoughts.  you can keep refining them until they feel just right.  and don't worry about the people looking.  even though we had guests there it felt very initmate.  i was talking to my best friend.  and yes i cried :) 
  • edited December 2011

    I am still not sure what we will do, I really like the idea of saying your own vows....here is an example I found that I really really liked...feel free to use it for ideas:

    Can you believe we're finally here? It's taken us YEARS to get here, and there's so much I want to say to you. I never expected to fall for you when I did. I wasn't looking for you, but all the sudden, there you were and since then, I could never quite get you out of my head. The day I told you I loved you was the best decision I ever made. It was the best thing I ever did for myself.  Love is about taking a leap of faith & trusting another person enough to let yourself be vulnerable. I know that hasn't always been the easiest thing for you to do, but I know you. I see you. And I'm committed to being yours for the rest of our lives. I hope you're able to take comfort in knowing that my love & acceptance are unchanging. I love you. We're partners. We're a team.  You're the one great love of my life & you're the best friend I've ever had. I feel so lucky. It's like we're in high school & you're the guy I have a crush on. Sometimes I look at you while you're busy doing other things, and I just think, "My God, how lucky am I that I get to have this man as my husband?" I can't believe I get to be married to you. You make me a better person. You amaze me with your love of learning, your desire to better yourself & provide for the people you love. It took us a long time to get to today. I'm thankful that we were both able to give each other second, third, fourth chances. You were so worth waiting for. I promise to keep seeing the good in people & things, and to share that with you when you can't find it. I promise to help you find happiness in the small things. I promise to be your rock & to comfort you in times of struggle. I promise to choose what we're having for dinner when you don't want to make a decision. I promise to always believe in you & never let you quit. I promise to never say anything bad about the (sports team, etc). I promise to love you & honor you & always hold our marriage above whatever life throws at us. I promise you patience. I promise to never, ever stop trying for you. I promise to pick you up. I promise to put you first. I promise to stand by you, be faithful to you, and love you for the rest of my life. 
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  • msktn95msktn95 member
    500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I want us to write our own vows, but I have not spoken to my FI about it yet.  We still have plenty of time.

    Previous Post is great. 
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