I need to vent!!!!

polim22 · May 2012

Not that we had any BIG plans this weekend, but we had planned on spending Saturday going to the Cape, hanging out, have a few drinks, whatever we wanted. (We haven't had a weekend without his daughter in months & this weekend we are kid free!) Finance announce this morning "oh, by the way I have to help my parents on Saturday morning - they are having 2 huge deliveries of mulch for their yard." It will be quick. Well, whenver he says this - it takes hours! Then I'm sure he'll have a few beers with his Dad. I'll probably see him sometime in the afternoon. So much for Saturday. I am SO annoyed.

brandichamberlain · May 2012

You're SO annoyed that your FI wants to do something nice for his parents instead of drinking in the early afternoon when you will still have the rest of the afternoon and night with him? Completely logical.

DodgersBride · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:f8c6539b-416d-49c5-9429-cb03602c410e">I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Not that we had any BIG plans this weekend, but we had planned on spending Saturday going to the Cape, hanging out, have a few drinks, whatever we wanted. (We haven't had a weekend without his daughter in months & this weekend we are kid free!) Finance announce this morning "oh, by the way I have to help my parents on Saturday morning - they are having 2 huge deliveries of mulch for their yard." It will be quick. Well, whenver he says this - it takes hours! Then I'm sure he'll have a few beers with his Dad. I'll probably see him sometime in the afternoon. So much for Saturday. I am SO annoyed.
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]

Do you normally tell strangers your vents?

Girlie1030 · May 2012

Define huge.

polim22 · May 2012

I know it sounds horrible. I love his parents. Its great he wants to help them. Its just that expectations we set earlier in the week that we would have a free Saturday. He travels ALOT during the week for work - and is pretty much exhausted come the weekend. His job is very physically demanding. I know that after mulching all morning he will be too tired to do anything else for the day. And throw a few beers into the mix - forget it. I know I must sound like a baby & I should just shut my mouth about it. I guess I just needed to get it off my chest.

Girlie1030 · May 2012

I've had Little Drummer Boy stuck in my head for the last 2 days. Now that's a real problem.

lbarr088 · May 2012

I have to say that I hate when plans change... but... that's just the thing, plans change ALL the time. Better to get over it now then start WWIII in your household. Also, if something like this annoys you I'd hate to see what happens when there is a serious situation which inevitably will happen at some point in your relationship.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · May 2012

Ah man. I'm so sorry you have to spend extra time with family. Major bummer.

polim22 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:a6d2368a-2c2a-4171-8baf-5126dd15f5f9">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Get over it. If you are going to marry a man with kids you better get used to plans changing. It happens when you are a parent.
Posted by Dot Dash[/QUOTE]

Your right. I have three children myself. I know parenting isnt not easy. Which is why when we have an opportunity for alittle bit of time without all the kids (his and mine) it is something we look forward to. I'm just being selfish I guess.

dmiller9274 · May 2012

I hate when my finances make announcements that my plans have changed.

LetsHikeToday · May 2012

I get that it sucks, I really do because stuff like that would happen when to me when we lived near our in laws. Does he do it a lot? If so, then you need to talk to him about it. If it's this one time, because his parents need help, you need to get over it. If you don't want to spend time, do YOU have to go? You could stay home.

Maggie214624 · May 2012

Your "finance" is such a jerk for helping out his dad instead of hanging with you. I mean his daughter takes up so much of his time too.

[Deleted User] · May 2012

Eh, I'd be annoyed if I already had plans with my H then all of a sudden everything changed and I had no say in the matter. Regardless of who he was helping, I'd be annoyed, especially since we rarely get time together during the week.

Why don't you just go with him? That's what I do. I tag along and either help him on jobs or just sit there while he works and talk to him. Time while working is better than no time at all.

polim22 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:de287e1c-dbff-4037-9998-d28964b79504">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Ah man. I'm so sorry you have to spend extra time with family. Major bummer.
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

Funny!

I must sound wicked. We see family EVERY week. He eats dinner at his parents every Wednesday night. He is wonderful that way. I guess I should look at from that perspective.

polim22 · May 2012

I just picked up on that I spelled "fiance" wrong. OOPS.

polim22 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:4328a62b-47dd-45d8-9144-26cf260a2ef7">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]I really don't think it's that big of a deal for OP to be bummed. She was looking forward to some alone time with her FI. Nothing wrong with that. OP, I'd just be honest with him and tell him you're bummed plans have changed. Do you guys have the rest of the weekend off to spend time together?
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

Thanks! I think he knows I'm alittle disappointed. I don't want him to bail out on his parents. They need his help - I get it.

We have alittle bit of time maybe on Sunday. Monday we are spending going to cemetaries for the Memorial Day holiday.

polim22 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:8e3e2fee-dda1-4874-84e7-e6b8fba98b64">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]I get that it sucks, I really do because stuff like that would happen when to me when we lived near our in laws. Does he do it a lot? If so, then you need to talk to him about it. If it's this one time, because his parents need help, you need to get over it. If you don't want to spend time, do YOU have to go? You could stay home.
Posted by LetsHikeToday[/QUOTE]

He usually helps his parents often. His sister doesn't really help out with stuff like this, and his brother is in the Army and is stationed in the Netherlands - so that leaves ithings to him. I may go with him - I think I may be in the way if I did though.

peekaboo2011 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:7bbbd325-d274-4755-8c68-05bfb4c7a7f9">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]I've had Little Drummer Boy stuck in my head for the last 2 days. Now that's a real problem. :)
Posted by Girlie1030[/QUOTE]

I've had Call Me Maybe stuck in my head for almost a full week. I can't get rid of it.

[Deleted User] · May 2012

Well, what is he doing? Spreading all of the mulch into various beds around the yard? You could help with that (assuming you're physically able to, aren't laid up with a broken foot or something).

Mulching sucks, but it doesn't usually take that long and definitely goes faster with 2 people.

polim22 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:7e996e2e-ded0-4216-9ef8-96e605437d30">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Well, what is he doing? Spreading all of the mulch into various beds around the yard? You could help with that (assuming you're physically able to, aren't laid up with a broken foot or something). Mulching sucks, but it doesn't usually take that long and definitely goes faster with 2 people.
Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

I probably will go and help. Yes - it is spreading mulch in their front yard and back yard. Mulching does suck. We just did it last week at our own house.

I spent most of this week getting all of my errands/chores, housework out of the way - looking forward to our free saturday. ARGHHH!!!

I think I need a glass of wine.

lbarr088 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:12cc81ff-872a-4a06-8d95-901fa635ce89">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I need to vent!!!! : I've had Call Me Maybe stuck in my head for almost a full week. I can't get rid of it.
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

<div>Hey Peek, I know I just met you, and this is craaaazy.....</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>.... call me maybe?</div>

ski2play · May 2012

Part of the reason I fell for FI was because of how he treated his parents. Me thinks you need more than a glass of whine, probably some cheese go with it.

LetsHikeToday · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:17e76908-ebac-4a08-9e62-aa59eda454b9">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I need to vent!!!! : He usually helps his parents often. His sister doesn't really help out with stuff like this, and his brother is in the Army and is stationed in the Netherlands - so that leaves ithings to him. I may go with him - I think I may be in the way if I did though.
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]
Well then you need to tell him that it bothers you when you make plans together and he breaks them. Have you brought that up yet?

allisong23 · May 2012

OP, I understand your frustration. Why don't you pack the car up so you will be ready to hit the road as soon as he is done, and go with him? That might prod him to move a little quicker.

I'm heading down to the Cape tonight, so I will have a beer for you. Plus, you will be missing all the traffic at the bridge tonight, so that is a plus!

MrsKathyC · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:f8c6539b-416d-49c5-9429-cb03602c410e">I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Not that we had any BIG plans this weekend, but we had planned on spending Saturday going to the Cape, hanging out, have a few drinks, whatever we wanted. (We haven't had a weekend without his daughter in months & this weekend we are kid free!) Finance announce this morning "oh, by the way I have to help my parents on Saturday morning - they are having 2 huge deliveries of mulch for their yard." It will be quick. Well, whenver he says this - it takes hours! Then I'm sure he'll have a few beers with his Dad. I'll probably see him sometime in the afternoon. So much for Saturday. I am SO annoyed.
Posted by polim22[/QUOTE]

Look on the bright side, the Cape on Memorial Day weekend is going to suuuccckkkkk! You'd probably spend most of your time in the car anyway. Come up to NH, we have a couple nice beaches :)

[Deleted User] · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:216099e4-a2cd-4341-980f-0e66119a546c">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]OP, I understand your frustration. <strong>Why don't you pack the car up so you will be ready to hit the road as soon as he is done, and go with him? </strong>That might prod him to move a little quicker. I'm heading down to the Cape tonight, so I will have a beer for you. Plus, you will be missing all the traffic at the bridge tonight, so that is a plus!
Posted by allisong23[/QUOTE]

I like this idea. And maybe bring a change of clothes so he can shower at his parents if need be.

lbarr088 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:92e31201-6649-4cbb-acf9-26a3627ceefc">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to I need to vent!!!! : Look on the bright side, the Cape on Memorial Day weekend is going to suuuccckkkkk! You'd probably spend most of your time in the car anyway. Come up to NH, we have a couple nice beaches :)
Posted by MrsKathyC[/QUOTE]

<div>Yup. We love FI's family but REALLY don't enjoy sitting in the traffic to get to the Cape. Also, be forewarned, they are doing bridge work!</div>

allisong23 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-to-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:165b6a1b-9d43-4517-a8bf-1821bae633dfPost:16ba1e3f-0bc7-44d9-899f-cc43415f13a8">Re: I need to vent!!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I need to vent!!!! : Yup. We love FI's family but REALLY don't enjoy sitting in the traffic to get to the Cape. Also, be forewarned, they are doing bridge work!
Posted by lbarr088[/QUOTE]

Bridge work is all done, luckily.

lbarr088 · May 2012

It's done? Thank goodness. The other weekend FSIL was trying to leave the cape to attend a graduation 2 hours away and it took her 4 hours. She was stuck at the bridge forever and then there was a ton of traffic the rest of the way. I hate the Cape in the summer, but then again, my area is super touristy but it doesn't require a bridge to get there

allisong23 · May 2012

Yeah, it was bad. My fanily has a house down there, so we go down almost every weekend. Since they got rid of the rotary, the traffic isn't that bad.

natemxsgirl · May 2012

I'm probably going to catch hell from a lot of people for saying thins but, I know how you feel. My FI does this to me all the time. We'll make plans for an entire day and then something that could be rescheduled for another weekend comes up and I'm stuck sitting around waiting for him to come home so we can get to the original plans. "It won't take long" Bull. Six hours later he's stumbling into the house drunk and is too tired. If I had a dollar for every hour I spent waiting for him to finish something like your FI's mulching, plus the money back from the countless number of things I have purchased only to have to cancel because something took longer than expected, I'd be loaded. I've paid for a lot of empty seats at concerts and sporting events.

I need to vent!!!!

Re: I need to vent!!!!

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