For married ladies

Liberty27 · July 2010

How did your venue handle carding at the bar? The reason why I ask is because at my friend's wedding, the put x's on the hands of the people they carded and it think that looks horribly "clubby" at a wedding, not to mention I don't enjoy scrubbing permanent marker off my hands. If my venue insists on marking the people who are questionably 21, would you as a guest appreciate one of those annoying bracelets more?

banana468 · July 2010

Personally, I'd rather know that each time I go up I have to show ID rather than wear an X or bracelet.

Calumet · July 2010

I have no idea what happened at my wedding, but there were no x's or bracelets. I assume the bartenders remembered or my guests took out their wallets repeatedly. No one complained to me....

Sorry that wasn't helpful.

I'd certainly prefer a bracelet over an x, but in all honesty I would most prefer to just keep showing my ID... I don't want to have any club-like markers on at a wedding.

AdeleDazeem · July 2010

I completely agree with Banana.

I've been to many open bar weddings and I've never seen Xs or bracelets.

FutureMrsFezz · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_married-ladies-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6f5f2721-d8f2-4623-bba2-c075fe0efa8ePost:a590d6b9-bb7b-4cc6-8e72-49e342e6fea4">Re: For married ladies</a>:
[QUOTE]Personally, I'd rather know that each time I go up I have to show ID rather than wear an X or bracelet.
Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]

This.

I honestly don't think they even ID'd anyone at our wedding. I know my 18 year old BIL was walking around with a mixed drink or two.

Liberty27 · July 2010

I am so glad to hear this! As a bridesmaid in a floor length purple dress w/ no purse I was a little peeved when I got carded and had to figure out who picked up my wallet after the ceremony while I was out taking pics with the bride, but I understood that at 23 it may happen, and then I got angry when they then insisted on xing my hand. That looked real nice in pics. Anyways, do you think it would be bridezilla to ask them not to do any marking at all?

danieliza1127 · July 2010

I honestly have no idea. I know no one's hand was marked and we didn't have bracelets. We also didn't really have anyone to really worry about though, so maybe it wasn't an issue for us.

pooh8402 · July 2010

they didn't; my venue was extremely laid back and basically the only rules were that we had to leave the space as is when we left, and had to have security with alcohol. as far as carding, we didn't do that either. a) we didn't have a bartender and b) Texas laws are such that if a person under 21 is in the presence of their parents and their parents approve, they can drink legally. the only folks under 21 were my sister (and all 4 of my parents were present) and another girl who came with her parents, then a whole mess of kids.

salt78 · July 2010

Wow...hand x's? That's pretty bad.

OH! Maybe you can do a stamp of some kind! Like one that says LEGAL real big.

Orrrrr you could just have them check ID.

Brie2010 · July 2010

I'm pretty sure nobody got carded at our wedding because I saw my 19 year old cousins running around with drinks.

opalsky007 · July 2010

I don't have a clue what happened at our wedding. No one carded the girl in the big white dress, that's for sure.

I think they would have asked for ID if it were questionable, but the only under-21 there who could pass as 21 was my sister, and no way was she drinking in front of my parents. Everyone else was obviously 21+, or obviously not.

aragx6 · July 2010

I'm not married but I'll say this: It's totally reasonable to ask your venue for anything you want. One venue's Web site I looked at said they had a tip jar out at the bar. Were I to seriously look at booking the place I'd tell them "no, freaking way. I'll give you X amount of $ instead."

kristinanddan · July 2010

I've only been to one wedding where we were even carded.

[Deleted User] · July 2010

They didn't. But then again we had the security guard as the bar tender and he was taking shots by the end of the night..

KentuckyKate · July 2010

I have no idea what happened at my wedding, either. No bracelets or X's though. And I definitely saw my two 16 year old cousins drinking, although I think an older cousin went to the bar for them...

To answer your question though... I agree- I'd rather show ID everytime than have an X or a bracelet. But if your venue won't agree to that, I would prefer the marker to the bracelet.

parker624 · July 2010

I've been carded at weddings before, but at least being carded isn't as bad as having a huge X on your hand.

The worst was we were at a family wedding and the bartender asked for ID. I didn't have it, since I didn't bring my wallet or anything, so after arguing with him for a while I had to drag my dad over to the bar to vouch for the fact that I was over 21. It was annoying and awkward.

*BeachBride0410* · July 2010

Our venue didn't card anyone or mark them if they were over 21. The only person I know who was drinking underage was my brother, who was 20 (3 months before he turned 21)

I paid for some adults who I knew didn't drink at all. I have never been carded at a wedding before.

JoyTate1 · July 2010

I have never been carded at a wedding before. I would rather have to bring my ID to the bar every time than be Xed or wear a bracelet. I wouldn't want my wedding looking like a club outing.

twilight.rose · July 2010

Nobody was carded at ours. I know some 18-19 year olds had mixed drinks and beer, and it wasn't a big deal.

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