when does father give bride away?

MissMandey · March 2010

So...statement of purpose...short sermon like blurb...moment of silence/prayer for absent family...then he gives you away? before you start the marrying business?

Is that correct?

mbcdefg · March 2010

I've never seen a parent "give away" their child in a real-life wedding ceremony. I've just seen the dad/whoever escort the bride down the aisle, maybe lift her veil if it's over her face, kiss her and shake the groom's hand/hug him, then sit down with the family.

I've heard of the officiant asking, "Who gives this woman in marriage?" or "Who supports this woman/couple in marriage?" (which I personally like better than the "giving away" mentality, because I'm an adult who makes my own decisions). Then the dad can say, "I do," or "Her family does" and then can sit down. Or all the parents can stand and answer, "We do."

I would ask your officiant what the norm in your religion is. Or if it's a secular ceremony, ask the officiant what (s)he might recommend to keep things flowing smoothly.

WGaches · March 2010

Yes, OP, the way you have it is the standard order for every wedding I've ever attended, and it's the order of ceremony for our wedding as well... just know that you can change things as much or as little as you want.

crakd · March 2010

i've seen it mostly at the very beginning.

father walks you down, you all stand there. officiant greets ("we're gathered here today blah blah"), then asks "who gives this..." then your dad hands you over and you go on with the ceremony.

our church has a few stairs up to the altar space, so this whole exchange happens at the bottom of the stairs (at the head of the aisle), then the wedding couple walks up the stairs together and the ceremony is conducted up there.

often there is a second part in the ceremony where the officiant asks the family to stand and asks them "do you promise to support this couple etc etc" and they all say "we do." that would come closer to the vows.

megk8oz · March 2010

Every wedding I've been to where the bride was escorted by her father, they walked down the aisle, and he placed the bride's hand in the groom's and then took his seat. Sometimes whoever was performing the ceremony would say "Who gives this woman in marriage?", and the father would say "Her mother and I do" right before this.

But I've never been to a wedding where the father actually stood in front of everybody for more than like 5 seconds.

when does father give bride away?

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