Oh No He Didnt ( hand on hip) (long)

MrsJJohnson2B · August 2010

Many of you know that FMIL arent that close. Last Sunday her and I were on the phone for 133 minutes. She said somethings and I said somethings in talking. I told her that we are women and we should talk like that. If you cant stand the heat get out the kitchen .

Well I guess she wanted to get out the kitchen. Last night FI went around her house and they were talking. She stated that she didnt like the way I talked to her, and thought I was unfriendly. When she comes over I speak and go up stairs.

(recap over the last 2.5 years she has stoping speaking to me 3 times, she always bring up his old girlfriends and how they were so close. I extended myself to her, when I would buy her mothers day , birthday and christmas gifts she would never say thank you )

So last night he ask could I stand down- STAND DOWN. I expressed my feelings and he asked if I could do it for him. I told him this is only for him! If she gets to far out of line Im going to say something.

I really dont want to be around her, Its going to take awhile. I rather move so I dont have to see her.

Do you think Im wrong?? TIA

hisSparklett · August 2010

My FMIL isn't my favorite person in the world but I also know that FI thinks the world of her, as in, no matter what he doesn't see her faults. I'm civil but only around her when I really, really HAVE to be. Maybe just try to keep the interaction between the two of you to a minimum and if you feel that she is working your nerve just walk away.

cyndon · August 2010

No you are not wrong! I understand doing it for him, but letting someone talk to you crazy or be rude to you is not right. I understand that is his mother, but he needs to talk to her just like he talked to you. My FI use to try and force me to talk to his mother and make us have a relationship and I told him that is not something that can be forced, it has to happen naturally, or it isn't going to happen. I would never be rude or disrespectful because that is his mother and that is not how my mother raised me, but letting someone intentionally be rude to you should never be an option. (Sorry, touchy subject for me too, as you can see, LOL)

mrandmrsjohnson09 · August 2010

You guys live together?

I know the feeling, and have recently "promised" my FI that I would treat his mother better. . . What they dont understand is, they are not our mothers, and most times there is some rivalry between us as far as cooking, cleaning, and treating of them. I'm slowly starting to Loathe mine. . .

adgenya · August 2010

I understand he wants the two of you to be more civil, but what exactly does he mean by stand down? If you are standing down, because he wants to "stand up" when she starts things, then fine. Otherwise, I kind of worry about him putting you behind his mother.

Hopefully he told his mom the same thing as well. I can definitely understand it being awkward for him, so you "standing down"/trying to get along with his mother would be better for him, but ultimately, if you are his wife, he should be putting you first.

desi2002 · August 2010

I dont deal with my MIL more than I need to. Need to know Basis. That actually keeps the drama down believe ot or not. HTH

cuddleberry · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_oh-didnt-hand-hip-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:f04ece98-22e9-4e58-84d1-dbf7510fe307Post:ab7e704e-6ac5-4ca0-82fb-1b883cf6d07a">Re: Oh No He Didnt ( hand on hip) (long)</a>:
[QUOTE]I dont deal with my MIL more than I need to. Need to know Basis. That actually keeps the drama down believe ot or not. HTH
Posted by desi2002[/QUOTE]
same with me but in my case its the FIL.

mrsblakemore · August 2010

Bringing up exes...oh no ma'am. Girl you are a saint, because I would have regulated on her.

Oh No He Didnt ( hand on hip) (long)

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