Are all wedding proposals romantic?

BosTonCoach84 · May 2012

So me and my future fiance to be went to go look at engagement rings and he ended up buying it while i was there. Nothing wrong with that cause he said he just purchased it and i still of course have to wait for the actual proposal. But i think because i know it's coming it may not be something special and i won't be surprised. So as my headline asks....Are all wedding proposals romantic?

achiduck · May 2012

I guess it depends on what your idea of "romantic" is. My propsal didn't have rose petals, music playing, or some huge grand gesture like you see on Youtube but it was still romantic in it's own way.

juliebug1997 · May 2012

I think it depends on the groom. My now husband is always very subtle in his romanticism. I knew he had the ring (there were some problems with it and he was trying to have it fixed). Well, the jewelry store didn't get it fixed in time for him to propose to me at our college campus (proposal under THE tree) and I was disappointed, but he asked me the night before Thanksgiving at dinner and it was still perfect. I thought he was going to officially ask that night, but I couldn't be sure.

In the end, for me, it didn't matter that we didn't get married at the romantic spot on our college's campus--we were getting married and that was really all that mattered.

Maggie0829 · May 2012

Was my proposal "romantic" by definition, no. Was it memorable and amazing and one of the best days of my life? Yes. My H and I had been together 8 years before he popped the question. We talked about getting married, what type of ring I wanted, we had moved in together a year before he asked me, etc. But I never knew when (or it) he was going to ask me. When he did, he asked me in our beach condo just the two of us. No champagne, no flowers, no music, nothing, but it still was an amazing moment because he asked me.

But I can see where you are coming from, you know he has the ring since he bought it right in front of you. In my opinion he should have just gotten down on one knee right when he knew he was going to purchase it because now when he asks it just won't seem as much of a surprise, but it will still be a great moment because it will be official.

Meghannsix · May 2012

My proposal was not romantic at all. But we're engaged, and eventually we'll be married. At first I was a bit disappointed, but honestly, I was never going to get some wildly romantic proposal out of this guy, that's just the way he is, and I love him anyway!

RailWayWife · May 2012

Of course not all are romantic. But just because you know he is going to purpose doesnt mean it wont be romantic

MrsKathyC · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_are-all-wedding-proposals-romantic?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:8707bcb0-71fe-4207-9b2c-d605976f6bbaPost:983b73ca-12c1-4788-8dd5-9ea9b719a5aa">Are all wedding proposals romantic?</a>:
[QUOTE]So me and my future fiance to be <strong><u>went to go look at engagement rings and he ended up buying it while i was there</u></strong>. Nothing wrong with that cause he said he just purchased it and i still of course have to wait for the actual proposal. But i think because i know it's coming it may not be something special and i won't be surprised. So as my headline asks....Are all wedding proposals romantic?
Posted by BosTonCoach84[/QUOTE]

That WAS my proposal!

BosTonCoach84 · May 2012

Thanks to all of you! You all have beautiful stories! I am a hopeless romantic and love all those gooey gushy love movies so i may have the perception that all proposals are real romantic and such. But you all are right, it may not be the most romantic proposal but as long as he does it and it's special to us it shouldn't matter. Thanks again ladies! You all helped a lot!

mcskatcat · May 2012

Ours wasn't romantic at all, and that I'm okay with. I think a lot of people build it up in their minds, but what really matters is the fact you two decided to get married - not how it was done.

cwaggoner07 · May 2012

I think for any mature, smart couple, you will have SOME idea it is coming. Mature adults talk about the next steps in their lives, so naturally it will come up. FI picked out my ring all on his own, but I knew we were going to get engaged in a certain 3-4 month period (and we did!).
He was moving back from California where he had been in film school, and we had been together almost four years. We had actually talked about getting engaged before he left for California, but it wasn't right for our situation since he was moving away for 2 years.
So yeah, I sort of knew it was coming, but I would feel disrespected if I felt it was something I had no say in. It's OUR marriage, so it is ultimately OUR decision.

eripat17 · May 2012

We bought my ring together because FI was too nervous to buy it by himself. He kept worrying that he was going to buy a ring that I didn't like (even though I told him a million times that I would love whatever he bought me no matter what!) We went to several jewelry stores to look at rings and ended up finding the perfect ring for an amazing price, but the sale was only for the weekend (it was Sunday) so he just bought it! The ring ended up taking 4 wks to come in because we had to order it in my size. He didn't tell me when it came in, took me out to dinner then to the ice cream shop where we had our first date and proposed! I ended up being very suprised, even though I didn't think I'd be!

cnf2013 · May 2012

I, to some degree, knew my proposal was coming. We own a house together and a dog together, so I knew eventually he'd asked. We'd talked about it a bit before. But the proposal itself wasn't romantic by today's stadrads of gooey, youtube braodcast, overinvolved proposals. It was the two of us walking our dog at the summer camp we met at forever and a day ago when he suddenly said he had a question for me, pulled out a ring and asked. Regardless of the fact that it wasn't "romantic", it was still special and emotional. Don't let the knowledge and anticipation dictate your feelings, just enjoy the moment when it happens!

jemmini6 · May 2012

Slightly off topic, but it's a pet peeve of mine...it's a marriage proposal, not a wedding proposal. A wedding is just one day, the marriage is your entire life after that day.

But to answer your question, they aren't all romantic in execution, but they are all romantic in nautre because what's more special and romantic than having someone ask you to spend the rest of your life with them? Plus, as PP said, a proposal shouldn't ever be a big surprise anyways, considering most adults talk about it before it happens. Knowing he has the ring isn't that much different from knowing that you'll be getting engaged soon from a discussion...there where, how and when are still a surprise though regardless of if you know about the ring or not.

I went shopping with H for my ring, though he went back without me to purchase it, but I knew he was going to. His proposal was still a surprise though, and pretty darn romantic if I do say so myself. But the best part about it was knowing that we were going to get married, how he asked was just the icing on the top.

erbear84 · May 2012

Mine was perfect for us, but probably not romantic in the gooey gushy love story way. He didn't even get down on one knee! As someone who has always been a bit of a romantic sap, I never pictured a man NOT on one knee until it happened - and it couldn't have been better.

ShyDreamer00 · May 2012

Was mine romantic, memorable, and the best day of my life? Absolutely, but I knew it was going to happen only because my FI was acting weird and I thought he was going to break up with me....when I didn't let go of the issue, he went and got the receipt for the ring to show me that he was doing the exact opposite of what I thought

Later in the week, he proposed to me (on one knee) in front of my mom and a classroom full of kindergartners that I was teaching! It was the sweetest proposal ever.....
BTW, this wasn't even his original proposal plan...he was planning to propose to me while we were having our pictures taken at a photo studio (one of best friends was a photographer there and had arranged everything), but the studio closed down the week before, LOL.
No matter what the proposal is, its the love of your life and best friend saying that he wants to spend the rest of their life with you-that's the most romantic thing a man can do

shannyb41 · May 2012

I knew the my fiance was going to propose. He asked me what type of rings I like....diamond shape etc. So I knew he was ring shopping...obviously. And I SWORE that I would know when he was going to do it. I swore that I knew him too well and there is no way he would surprise me. But he did. And I cried. It wasn't super romantic (bc he's not like that) but it was very nice....very private...and the timing was perfect.

So don't be so quick to think that you'll know. Because I had no idea hahaha. He just caught me at a moment when my mind was on something else.

BosTonCoach84 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_are-all-wedding-proposals-romantic?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:8707bcb0-71fe-4207-9b2c-d605976f6bbaPost:b8b15035-3a20-4a3c-ab09-3e0780798487">Re: Are all wedding proposals romantic?</a>:
[QUOTE]We bought my ring together because FI was too nervous to buy it by himself. He kept worrying that he was going to buy a ring that I didn't like (even though I told him a million times that I would love whatever he bought me no matter what!) We went to several jewelry stores to look at rings and ended up finding the perfect ring for an amazing price, but the sale was only for the weekend (it was Sunday) so he just bought it! The ring ended up taking 4 wks to come in because we had to order it in my size. He didn't tell me when it came in, took me out to dinner then to the ice cream shop where we had our first date and proposed! I ended up being very suprised, even though I didn't think I'd be!
Posted by eripat17[/QUOTE]

Wow that is funny because that is exactly what happened with us. We went to a few stores to look and when i found the one i liked they were having a sale only for the weekend. He said that there was no way he was going to pass on the sale they were having.

shannyb41 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_are-all-wedding-proposals-romantic?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:8707bcb0-71fe-4207-9b2c-d605976f6bbaPost:85a80094-e9ab-4c85-8511-f1fd5360c470">Re: Are all wedding proposals romantic?</a>:
[QUOTE]Mine was perfect for us, but probably not romantic in the gooey gushy love story way. He didn't even get down on one knee! As someone who has always been a bit of a romantic sap, I never pictured a man NOT on one knee until it happened - and it couldn't have been better.
Posted by erbear84[/QUOTE]

My fiance didn't get down on one knee either!! haha he didnt even ACTUALLY ask me to marry him. I think he forgot. I teased him about it later that night.
We were at an ice cream place (that was closed grr) on top of a mountain overlooking a valley near where we live. We go there a lot. We were taking pics and I complained about the sun glare on the screen of my phone. I said that I couldnt even see what I was taking a picture of. And he came up behind me and said "can you see this" and had the ring box opened. hahahah he didnt say "will you marry me" he didnt get on one knee.
maybe i didnt get him a chance though haha. all i said was "yes i see it" and then i asked if i could have it. LMAO.

Nshivers · May 2012

Ours wasn't! He didn't even speak.. our eyes spoke to each other. I knew exactly what he was saying and he didn't have to say a word! The we sat there and looked like geeks with smiles the size of Texas on our faces.

hmacsine · May 2012

I think my fi's proposal was romantic. He didn't have music, rose petals etc. he proposed to me in our bedroom. The love I seen in his eyes and everything he told me, made it the most romantic proposal ever.

artbyallie · May 2012

I knew a proposal was coming because I helped him order the ring, which he had shown me when he picked it out. Actually, I knew before that, because he confessed that he had planned to propose that March but didn't have a chance to get a ring and he didn't want to do it without one. Anyway, he had the ring by Mother's Day that year and I waited. And waited.

Finally, we were at these gorgeous gardens on my family vacation. I kept expecting the proposal and being disappointed when it didn't happen. I even tried to see if there was an outline of the ring box in his pocked and couldn't see it. I was hot, bug-bitten, and irritated. By the time we stepped into a sunken part of the garden with statues and a fountain, I was no longer expecting the proposal that day. Which, of course, is when I turned away from the fountain to find him kneeling down. It was perfect and romantic because it was from the love of my life. I wouldn't change a thing, even the bug bites that almost scarred my legs.

LinD25 · May 2012

We went on vacation with another couple (friends) and her and I went shopping and found my ring. I loved it. We went back to the boys and told my FI about it (he had said before we left if I found a ring I loved, we'd buy it, but I didn't really think he was serious). The four of us went back to the store and he got them to come down on the price a little more (it was an awesome deal already and this made it even better!) and he put down his card and said "I'll take it". I was in shock. He was then like "Well you can put it on since it's yours" and I responded with "You have to actually ask me first!" I thought he was going to wait until we got back home to ask because we had talked about it before and I wanted him to talk to my Mom first (since my Dad has passed away). The next day, we were standing on our balcony and I turn around and he's getting down on one knee to propose! All I could think about was "OMG, get up! Get up! We haven't even paid the ring off and you're going to drop it into the ocean!" It was sweet and he was so nervous.

mhogberg · May 2012

Romantic? Not really. Expected? Yes, very. He came bounding into the kitchen the night before all excited because he said he finally knew exactly how he wanted to propose. This is after we had picked out the ring together and it had been sitting in our gun safe for 3 weeks (TORTURE) So he told me that monday after work just hang out for awhile and I'll call you when I'm ready... I FINALLY got the call to head home, I open the door and here comes our big black lab bounding at me with this make shift sign around her neck. Once I finally get her to sit still so I can read it, it said some thing like this, "Momma, you know how you and Poppa always say 'If only I (the dog) could talk, you wonder what I would say?' Well I was wondering if you would marry my Poppa so we could be one big happy family."

Then R came around the corner and got down on one knee.

So ok maybe kinda romantic, but it was diff. cute and diff. us.

RebeccaB88 · May 2012

We're still paying off my ring, so I haven't had the 'official' proposal yet. (And I shopped for and picked out my own ring, FI hasn't even SEEN it yet outside of a picture I texted him, lol.) But I can't imagine him not doing it right, you know? I told him I just wanted it to be private and quiet, no billboards or Jumbotrons or anything. I even told him I'd be perfectly happy with just putting it on in the middle of the jewelry store instead (he didn't go for that). However it ends up happening, it will be fantastic, because I'll be marrying my best friend and love of my life. What's better than that?

BosTonCoach84 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_are-all-wedding-proposals-romantic?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:8707bcb0-71fe-4207-9b2c-d605976f6bbaPost:cb8cb694-f912-457d-9d99-28ea2f5e6631">Re: Are all wedding proposals romantic?</a>:
[QUOTE]We're still paying off my ring, so I haven't had the 'official' proposal yet. (And I shopped for and picked out my own ring, FI hasn't even SEEN it yet outside of a picture I texted him, lol.) But I can't imagine him not doing it right, you know? I told him I just wanted it to be private and quiet, no billboards or Jumbotrons or anything. I even told him I'd be perfectly happy with just putting it on in the middle of the jewelry store instead (he didn't go for that). However it ends up happening, it will be fantastic, because I'll be marrying my best friend and love of my life. What's better than that?
Posted by RebeccaB88[/QUOTE]

Yeah i told him that he doesn't have to take me out anywhere or doing anything spectacular. I told him that he can even do it at home but i just want that little touch of special i guess.But all you ladies are right. However, he does it i'm sure it will be special and a memorable moment for us. And you are so right! What better than marrying your best friend and love of you life! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

lls31 · May 2012

My proposal wasn't romantic, but we're not exactly mushy people so I didn't expect that. We were in Chicago for a wedding with a group of friends over Labor Day weekend. On our last day there, FI had planned several different scenarios to get me alone and propose. All of his plans fell through. Even dinner that night - it was supposed to be just the two of us, but 3 of our friends ended up joining us. FI finally gave up on his other plans and decided to propose at dinner (with our friends present). It was perfect and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

divinemsbee · May 2012

I was proposed to on a couch while watching The Soup after eating Pizza Hut. Seriously. And it was awesome. FI had bought my ring online (from one of my favorite jewelers) during a sale and I was with him when he did that and with him when he picked up the package out of the mail box. He had wanted to wait, but knowing that I'm a pretty impatient person, and also, it's not like he was saving the ring for anyone else, he proposed that night. I wouldn't have it any other way. If it was between getting engaged that night or waiting for some champagne and fireworks deal, I'd choose our crappy wicker couch every time.

JNV825 · May 2012

My proposal was romantic in the way of it being the ost important question coming from my future husband but in reality it wasn't a very romntic scenario. He came home from work and had made a deal with me that if I managed to fix our constantly breking internet then he would get me a suprise (typically a scratch off ticket or a piece of candy), well I managed to fix and that was about it for that day, I didn't shower and I was in his bagy pj pants and his wayyyy to big t shirt when he came home from work. He told me to close my eyes for my suprise and when I opened them he was on one knee and asked me to marry me.

So while there were no flowers, violins or doves being released, FI managed to actually suprise me, I knew a proposal was coming but based on his typical MO when it came to things for me, I was actually expecting some big hullabaloo that would definitley tip me off, but nope he shocked the crap out of me and I always say that the only thing I would of chnaged was that I would have taken a shower that day lol.

abwatts · May 2012

I'm somewhat in the same boat as you. I used to believe that it should be complete suprise... but we talked so much about our future that I was getting anxious, so he calmed me down and told me he "had a plan". We started going ring shopping together, (at his request not mine, I wanted him to be realllly sure about me trying on a rind). But I THINK (ok 100% sure, ) he purchased a ring already... and I think he did it when I was there.. I usually walk off when he starts talking money with jewlers. He has told me all sorts of stories to try to throw me off.. and I let him have his little lies, because I know that suprising me is important to HIM almost as much as it is to me. But there is still so much anticipation surrounding the event. I dont care if he does it while sitting on the couch watching TV, because no matter when he does it I will be thrilled because I want nothing more in life is to marry my best friend, and THAT is what will make is so romantic!

whitneymarie504 · May 2012

There's quite the story behind my recent proprosal story. On March 26 I had to have a thymectomy to remove my over active thymus which will in turn hopefully help me with an auto immune disorder I was diagnosed with this year. My FI (then bf) and my Mom went with on the day of my surgery. They put me under at 7am saying I'd be in recovery and able to see them by noon. They stopped hearing from the DRs for awhile and where quite worried. I guess he pretty much made his decision then that if I pulled out of surgery he was definately going to ask me sooner than later (we had already been talking and he said within a year) - he admits to being scared they lost me on the OR table before he ever got to ask. When he finally got to see me around 3:30 that day he told me I was beautiful, I let out the only laugh I could at that point and told him to shut up. Iodine smears, no makeup, messy hair, and hospital gowns are not attractive afterall but he assured me that seeing me with my eyes open, off the ventilator, and talking was more than enough for him.

Fast forward about a week. I'm still in a lot of pain, on medication, 10 lb lift limit etc and we get a phone call from his brother at 4:30am asking if he works that day, which he did. We find out his elderly grandfather, currently 95, was taken to the hospital for falling. I asked if he wanted me to go stay at the house with him for the day incase anything happened. We realized no one was really here enough, basic tasks like making sure he had nutritious meals and clean towels wheren't being taken care of, and that night as we laid in the guest room we decided to move in. Within a day we realized something wasn't right, took him back to the hospital and found out he needed to be hospitalized for pneumonia- thank God he was able to come home on Easter.

Fast forward a few weeks. Grandpa and myself are doing much better, the house is back to how a home should be kept, and we are living here quite happily. I work nights and he works days so someones almost always here. I give my 30 day notice and start moving out of my apartment and into here/a storage unit....on a Sunday evening after a long day of packing I text him saying I wish I could grab a bottle of wine but I wouldn't be able to make it from the apartment to town and to the liquor store in time and he said he would go. When he gets home while I'm unloading the car in the pouring rain he goes right inside which I thought was odd but keep unpacking. When I got done he was like "hey babe come in here" and I go in the bathroom to find a glass of my favorie wine, hot bubble bath, and a single red rose on the edge of the tub!

He sat in there talking to me while I soaked in the tub and we wind up talking engagement, wedding, and babies. I'm taking him seriously but not in that "oh he's going to ask" type of serious. He asked me how I felt about maybe speeding up the process because his Grandpa is doing better but for who knows how long and he would really love to have his Grandpa at the wedding and I said I was more than fine with that because I know we are going to get married eventually. He asks me how I feel about getting married in June for his golden birthday so he can have a new wife as a present. I laughed, didn't really think he was serious.

Later that night I'm standing with sopping wet hair, no makeup, in only my silky bathrobe in our bedroom and he stops, looks me in the eyes and says "Baby, I know I don't have the ring yet and I have to ask your Mom for it and I have to ask your Dad for your hand but will you marry me? I want you to be my wife." I say yes and start crying....that night after he fell asleep I snuck out to the kitchen and excitedly tell my Mom to expect a phone call. She's been saving her wedding ring for me for 13 years!

Our plan kind of got hashed when after he talked to my Mom she called the venue we wanted to see if it was available on our date and booked it. Word travels fast in a small town. So before I got my OFFICIAL with ring proposal we had a reception venue, florist, invitations, wedding gown, tuxes, BM dresses, etc all taken care of.

I finally got my official proposal that Friday...we where out driving around looking at ceremony locations and he had told me he wanted it to be a surprise so it wouldn't be that wknd but I knew the ring box was in the car. We got to one location, he forgot his cigarrettes and went back to get them. We where in love with the location and thought we where going to get married there and before we where leaving he said "lets take a picture of us" it turned out really cute so I was loading it on Facebook and when I look up he's down on one knee with the ring in his hand. I was COMPLETELY SHOCKED and unsuspecting even though I KNEW it was coming soon!!!! He said "whitney will you marry me?" I of course said yes and then we just sat there.

BOTH of my proposals where romantic in there own ways.

aro1589 · May 2012

We gpt enaged twice. And neither time was it romantic.

He first proposed to me FOUR years ago. We were 19 and 20 and apart for the first time [college]. After being apart for a grueling 10 days (haha) he was so happy to see me on Labor Day weekend, he just blurted it out. No ring, no down on one knee, no thought behind it really!

About two years later, I picked out a ring, ordered it, and told my fiance he was paying for it. I was tired of waiting and didn't trust him to get a ring I loved. Since we we're already engaged and about to move in together, I knew he would re-propose soon. He did about a week after the ring came in. We were on the swingset at the park by my mom's house that we walked to all the time. I knew he was going to give me the ring so I wasn't at all surprised, but super excited to FINALLY be wearing one

Are all wedding proposals romantic?

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