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kids in the wedding

sharinlukesharinluke
in Second Weddings
This is a second marriage for both  me & my FI.  He has one son & I have 2 sons & a daughter.  My oldest is 17, should he walk me down the aisle or my father or by myself?  Im really stuck on this!  PLZ HELP!    We were thinking of having the other 2 boys as groomsmen and my daughter as jr bridesmaid. 
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Re: kids in the wedding

  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    Ask your children what they would like to do - if they want to participate ask them what roles they want to play.  My DSD (dear step-daughter) escorted with my MIL my DH, and stood near him because she had a "reading" she choose and volunteered to do. She was days away from turning 18 at the time.  We involved her as much as she wanted to be involved. 
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  • right1thistimeright1thistime member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    My kids were 14 & 16 whe we got married.  They were bridesmaid & groomsman.  I walked alone.  ~Donna
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  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited February 2012
    There really is no right or wrong answer. As Angie said, ask them what part they'd like to play in the wedding. The "etiquette" answer is that the person walking you down the aisle is the person handing you off to your hubby.......at least that's what it meant years ago. I had 2 kids when I got married last August, and had never been married, so my 84 yr old Dad walked me down the aisle as it was the first time he could do this.

    Do what feels right to the other people involved. If your symbolism is that you are mature enough to get married and doing it as a single woman, then walk down yourself........or walk down with your fiance.......or kids. It only matters what feels right to all of you, not what others will think.

    My 24 y/o son was a groomsman, my 17 y/o daughter was my MOH, one of Kevin's daughters was a BM, his granddaughter was our flowergirl. Sadly his other 2 kids couldn't make it, but they would have been in the wedding party as well.

    Congrats and welcome.
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  • PrettyInPearls23PrettyInPearls23
    10 Comments
    My DS is only 2, but he'll be 3.5 by the time we get married. I'm planning on having him "walk" me down the aisle, even if it results in me carrying him on one hip and my bouquet in the other hand. He's a toddler and they're unpredictable. I'm perfectly fine with that. (I'll also have a helper at the end of the aisle in case he refuses either option completely and needs to be whisked away).

    To me, it's symbolic of starting our new life together as a family. Me and DS joining FI at the "alter" to start the ceremony.

    That will be DS's only involvement in our ceremony.
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  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited February 2012

    Each of us had one attendant. My only son, 18 (he also played a violin duet as part of the ceremony), was  my best man.  DH's best friend of 40+ years was his best man.  Neither of his 2 adult children or grandchildren were involved in the ceremony.  In fact, none of them came to the wedding (all were invited, their choices not to show).

    How did we walk in?  We walked onto the terrace together, hand-in-hand, and greeted each of the guests individually ... hugs, kisses and thanked them for joining us that day.  Then, we went back in, I picked up my bouquet and the 5 of us (attendants, officiant, groom, bride) processed toward the canopy single file.

    Read the thread "How to Include the Children," above, about children in weddings.  That might help.

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  • xobridexobride
    500 Comments
    I agree that you should ask them, but I don't see why they can't all walk you down the aisle.  My father has passed so my 3 boys are all walking me down the aisle.  My youngest will be in front with the ring box and the oldest two on either side.  My daughter is the "flower girl" even though she'll be 11 by then.
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  • aynos77aynos77 member
    100 Comments
    I have one DD  - 13 who will be my maid of honor, I lost my father 11 years ago, so my DS -12 will walk me down the isle. And FI and I have a DD together - 3 who will be our flower girl. They are super excited!
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  • squarepeg72squarepeg72
    100 Comments

    Ask them ... The kids will tell you wht they want to do. My son (13) asked if he could walk me down the aisle and my youngest (8) declared that she and Lexi (FH's BFF's daughter) were going to be the best flower girls ever. My oldest(19) asked to if she could be a BM and then I surprised her and asked her to be my MOH. THe kids have been a part of the p;anning every step of the way. The kids are even asking FH to join our family (he is a bachlor with no kiddos) instead of givving me away. 

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  • klevins36klevins36
    First Comment

    My father passed away 2 years ago.  My daughter who is 12 has told me she would like to walk down the aisle with me.  I agree that you should ask what part they would like to have in your wedding. 

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