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groomsman asked to step down :-(

rebarobert2012rebarobert2012
500 Comments
in Wedding Party
Originally, my fiance had 5 groomsmen, and I had 4 bridesmaids.  We were completely fine with having uneven sides.

Over the weekend, one of my fiance's groomsmen called him and told him he would be stepping down from the wedding party because he had found out we were having uneven sides and thought it would be *awkward.*  My fiance explained to him that no one was going to escort anyone, so it would not be awkward, and asked him if he would reconsider.  The groomsman said no.

Honestly, I think this is a little weird.  My fiance thinks this is the only reason the groomsman wanted to drop out, but I think there is probably another reason.  Obviously, we will probably never find out what it is, and we aren't going to press it, but we are a little hurt.

Has anyone else ever had a groomsman or bridesmaid ask to drop out of the wedding party because of uneven sides?
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Re: groomsman asked to step down :-(

  • goobersinlovegoobersinlove member
    500 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited March 2012
    Wow! I can't believe that happened to you guys, and that the asthetics of a wedding that isn't even his is more important to him that being there. :-(
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  • ceh789ceh789 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-asked-to-step-down?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:b1d51cf2-27c6-41aa-9504-3d6a3ce7db9ePost:13369e8a-f788-4505-9955-310328838903">groomsman asked to step down :-(</a>:
    [QUOTE]...I think there is probably another reason.  Obviously, we will probably never find out what it is, and we aren't going to press it, but we are a little hurt.
    Posted by rebarobert2012[/QUOTE]
    There's probably another reason but yeah you can't really waterboard him to find out what it is :)<div>
    </div><div>You can be hurt, but I'd probably choose not to be.  There are eleventy billion reasons not to be in someone's wedding even if you are very very close - money, time, stage fright, secretly in love with the bride <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-wink.gif" border="0" alt="Wink" title="Wink" />.  Assume good intentions.</div>
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  • OsterizerOsterizer member
    100 Comments
    I agree, there's probably more to it.  Maybe he thinks he has to spend a lot of money and is too embarrassed to tell you that he doesn't have the money to rent a tux.  I would accept and respect his resignation and be done with it.  Pushing the issue might cause further embarrassment if that's the case.
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  • OBX2011OBX2011 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2012

    Our best man dropped out 1 month before our wedding, but he had a really good reason and even though we were bummed about it, we understood what he was going through.

    Sorry that he dropped out but like you said, there may be a reason that you may never know and it could very well be b/c it's something personal and he doesn't want to share it right now.

    Just keep focused on seeing your FI for the first time on your wedding day :)

     

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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I really don't think I know any guys who would give a rip about the sides being even.  I'm guessing there is more to it and he wants to keep it private.  Don't be mad at him, just let it go and enjoy having him as a guest.
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  • rebarobert2012rebarobert2012
    500 Comments

    Thanks, everyone.  We've accepted it and we won't ask him for any details, but I know my fiance is still pretty disappointed.  He will obviously still invite him to the wedding, though, and he is still going to invite him to the bachelor party as well.

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  • mandi921vhmandi921vh member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    That seems to be a very strange reason to drop out, however there might be something else he is dealing with that he doesn't feel comfortable sharing right now.
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