In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_cant-decide?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:89967db6-c202-4184-a1ad-071b4d6ca7afPost:f89bd40c-e93e-4f0c-88c0-b94428be1969">cant decide...</a>: [QUOTE]ok so i have no idea how i should choose my MOH. i have 2 very good friends, one ive been good friends with for like 4 years and would seem to be an easy choice for my MOH BUT my fiance doesnt like her very much and shes kind of unpredictable with her actions..i guess im just unsure about how it would work out. i could turn out either way...she could be very helpful or not so much. on the other hand i have a close friend that ive had for about a year-ish now that is very excited for my wedding, wants to help me plan everything, and has helped my pick out my dress and bridesmaids dresses (well at least narrowed down the choices lol) shes just over all very helpful and i wouldnt have to worry about things getting done with her around. But i dont want to offend anyone...i just dont know who to chose! anybody else have this problem? Posted by ratzlaf4[/QUOTE]<div> </div><div>Welcome to the boards! I encourage you to lurk for a bit next time because this specific question gets asked at least 20+ a week (just reworded in the topics).</div><div> </div><div>To answer your question, you choose the person who if you had a serious problem be it thrown in jail, burying a body, a personal loss, etc, you would call (that isn't your FI). That person regardless of what they may do for you, should be given the honor of the title MOH.</div><div> </div><div> Please do not base your choice on what people may do for you because it is not required of any WP to help plan or do stuff for your wedding (that is the job of you and your FI). Granted you will have friends (like your newer friend) who will love to help you in planning and that is great, it is their free will to volunteer. But do not expect help or interest from people, and definitely do not base your choice on the assumption of the older friend isn't going to help you.</div><div> </div><div>So if you have an answer to what person you would call that should be your MOH. You may also have 2 MOH or none. </div><div> </div><div>Hope this clears things up for you.</div><div> </div><div>P.S. FYI before you start choosing dresses please consult individually each of your BMs what they can budget for<em> their </em>dress. Picking their dresses or even having something in mind now can possibly cause more problems down the road when it comes to ordering (ex. BM can't afford the dress).
This question has been asked many, many times on this and the wedding party board. I would recommend you look around a bit before you make any decisions. But here are some pointers.
Pick your closest friend or family member. You pick your side, your fi picks his. You may have one, two or no MOH. If you can't choose between the two, choose both. If your wedding is June 2013, it's much too early to choose your wedding party. Relationships can change. Again, check out the numerous posts on the wedding party and this board on this subject. Wait until 6 -9 months before your wedding to ask anyone. Covejack is a nice, honest person. Take time to get to know us before you decide to put anyone in their place.
Congratulations on your engagement. Happy planning.
this is getting rediculous. i got rid of it so people would calm down and not over react to my post that everyone took wrong. people just need to simmer down and realize this is just a website and not a place to argue. if you think its rude...or whatever you think, it doesnt matter, just keep it to yourself. it doesnt do anyone any good to lash back with a just as rude comment as deleted comment, idk how its rude but if you think so, sorry you think that but keep it to yourself. this shouldnt be happening here.
ha im not worked up in the slightest. i just feel like highschool ended a while ago and acting this way isnt needed. theres no point to it. but ur right i dont have a right to tell you how to post, but please tell me what the point of telling someone you think theyre rude and childish, ect? someone said to me that i should get to know everyone before i "put them in their place" so maybe you guys do the same. i just feel like its just as rude and childish for people to post this stuff, this isnt what this site is for. if its my opinion that they should keep those comments to themselves, then what is it to you?
and i was rude how? i posted something, people took it the wrong way and i tried to explain then the comments started becoming pointless so i got rid of it so people would stop because it was a dead post. if you think thats rude...again sorry you think that. your right i didnt like what i got because thats not what i asked for, my post was 100% taken the wrong way. Oh and i wasnt directing any coments, i was merely stating my opinion just like everyone else. take it or leave it, its just an opinion. sounds like people are in attack mode and need to calm down.
and now you are just looking for things to argue about. what was the point of that? really...what was the point? does it make you feel more important? this comments are the most childish things ive seen. and you should just stop because its going no where. so someone please tell me what the point of lashing out with the comments are for.
what???? that wasnt even what my post was about! i think your confusing mine withs someone elses. i would never give my MOH a list of things to do, im not that kind of person.
ahhhh gotcha, see this is where people got confused. it was more like how should i chose between someone who seems more unintereted vs. someone who want to be involved. i was just listing what shes done for me already. i would never ever make my MOH do stuff she didnt want to do, ever. take it how you want.
maybe you shouldnt assume things then becaue you dont know...instead of saying "i dont have the energy for this" which started this whole thing, couldnt it have been like " wait do you think that your MOH has a huge list of to do's?" that way i could have cleared it up right away. now i know this is a touchy subject but just think before you speak, this whole thing could have been avoided. not putting the blame on you, i should have been more clear of what i was trying to say. and sorry for using text talk, its been a long habit ive been trying to get rid because trust me, i also think its annoying. but please dont jump down my throat about it, its not necessary. people shouldnt judge a person for for putting an "idk" one time in there comments...that just isnt right. i know people judge anyway, its human nature but its just not right. and also, im new, i wouldnt know it was considered "rude" i still dont think so but if you do, im sorry. i just thought it was a post getting out of hand and i dont know how else to get rid of it.
ok AND my post wasnt about my MOH not doing enough. i never gave anyone a list of things to do. i saw that after i posted mine, one of the reasons i was trying to get rid of it. i didnt even go through this whole thing to see if every 5 were about a MOH especially since mine isnt about one not doing enough. i agree its a place of honor and if they want to help with other things then great! that wasnt my intention with this post...i dont know why thats so hard to get. ive said this over and over and over and even apologized! if you want to keep going back and forth then ok but im done. i shouldnt have even had to defend myself this far.
i never had a bad idea because your assuming what other people have been saying. i never said i think my MOH has a list of stuff to do, never ever did. if you think it fine. i dont know how to put it more simply.
never offended (theres the assuming again), clearly some people dont know how to reply because that person had the same reaction. its not just me. this isnt highschool. but hey keep acting that way. i dont care, ive been trying to be understanding through this whole thing but this is just stupid haha if this is how you want to act, good for you. sorry you dont understand such a simple thing...on that note. night!
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_cant-decide?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:89967db6-c202-4184-a1ad-071b4d6ca7afPost:16541efb-c8cd-427e-9898-04a7bfeb2abe">Re: .</a>: [QUOTE]never offended (theres the assuming again), clearly some people dont know how to reply because that person had the same reaction. its not just me.<strong> this isnt highschoo</strong>l. but hey keep acting that way. i dont care, ive been trying to be understanding through this whole thing but this is just stupid haha if this is how you want to act, good for you. sorry you dont understand such a simple thing...on that note. night! Posted by ratzlaf4[/QUOTE]
Of course not. But based on your typing, it doesn't appear you ever made it to high school, because you should know how to capitalize, use correct punctuation and sentence structure by the time you get to high school. Since you are doing none of those things, I'll assume you never made it.
And FYI before you go complaining about how rude I was and how you shouldn't have to use correct grammar, yadda yadda yadda...this is a message board. We can only respond based on what you TYPE. So if you type like a middle schooler, that's how you'll be treated. Being lazy when you type suggests that you just don't care, and if you don't care, why should we care to give you helpful, polite advice?
Just something to keep in mind if you decide to continue posting on TK....
If you really want an answer to your question, you really won't be able to find it here. As other posters have said, you pick your MOH based on your nearest and dearest not what they can do for you...you know these girls the best and you are the only one who will be able to make this decision. We don't know your friends from Joe Schmo down the street so how on earth can we help you decide. Take a moment, leave the wedding out of it, and ask yourself this question..."who can you talk to about anything and everything and know that no matter what you say they will still be there for you?" The person that pops into your head first is most likely your best friend and the person that means the most to you and thus should be your MOH.
Re: .
[QUOTE]ok so i have no idea how i should choose my MOH. i have 2 very good friends, one ive been good friends with for like 4 years and would seem to be an easy choice for my MOH BUT my fiance doesnt like her very much and shes kind of unpredictable with her actions..i guess im just unsure about how it would work out. i could turn out either way...she could be very helpful or not so much. on the other hand i have a close friend that ive had for about a year-ish now that is very excited for my wedding, wants to help me plan everything, and has helped my pick out my dress and bridesmaids dresses (well at least narrowed down the choices lol) shes just over all very helpful and i wouldnt have to worry about things getting done with her around. But i dont want to offend anyone...i just dont know who to chose! anybody else have this problem?
Posted by ratzlaf4[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Welcome to the boards! I encourage you to lurk for a bit next time because this specific question gets asked at least 20+ a week (just reworded in the topics).</div><div>
</div><div>To answer your question, you choose the person who if you had a serious problem be it thrown in jail, burying a body, a personal loss, etc, you would call (that isn't your FI). That person regardless of what they may do for you, should be given the honor of the title MOH.</div><div>
</div><div> Please do not base your choice on what people may do for you because it is not required of any WP to help plan or do stuff for your wedding (that is the job of you and your FI). Granted you will have friends (like your newer friend) who will love to help you in planning and that is great, it is their free will to volunteer. But do not expect help or interest from people, and definitely do not base your choice on the assumption of the older friend isn't going to help you.</div><div>
</div><div>So if you have an answer to what person you would call that should be your MOH. You may also have 2 MOH or none. </div><div>
</div><div>Hope this clears things up for you.</div><div>
</div><div>P.S. FYI before you start choosing dresses please consult individually each of your BMs what they can budget for<em> their </em>dress. Picking their dresses or even having something in mind now can possibly cause more problems down the road when it comes to ordering (ex. BM can't afford the dress).
</div>
Pick your closest friend or family member.
You pick your side, your fi picks his.
You may have one, two or no MOH. If you can't choose between the two, choose both.
If your wedding is June 2013, it's much too early to choose your wedding party. Relationships can change. Again, check out the numerous posts on the wedding party and this board on this subject. Wait until 6 -9 months before your wedding to ask anyone.
Covejack is a nice, honest person. Take time to get to know us before you decide to put anyone in their place.
Congratulations on your engagement. Happy planning.
[QUOTE]never offended (theres the assuming again), clearly some people dont know how to reply because that person had the same reaction. its not just me.<strong> this isnt highschoo</strong>l. but hey keep acting that way. i dont care, ive been trying to be understanding through this whole thing but this is just stupid haha if this is how you want to act, good for you. sorry you dont understand such a simple thing...on that note. night!
Posted by ratzlaf4[/QUOTE]
Of course not. But based on your typing, it doesn't appear you ever made it to high school, because you should know how to capitalize, use correct punctuation and sentence structure by the time you get to high school. Since you are doing none of those things, I'll assume you never made it.
And FYI before you go complaining about how rude I was and how you shouldn't have to use correct grammar, yadda yadda yadda...this is a message board. We can only respond based on what you TYPE. So if you type like a middle schooler, that's how you'll be treated. Being lazy when you type suggests that you just don't care, and if you don't care, why should we care to give you helpful, polite advice?
Just something to keep in mind if you decide to continue posting on TK....