May 2012 Weddings

Last Name Change

I thought it would be fun to see how the May Knot-ies are going about the name change issue for the wedding.

My FI and I have talked about several possibilities, including some which are not so traditional. We're both hyphenating our last name...so it will be Justin MyLastName-HisLastName & Chelsea MyLastName-HisLastName -- or Mr. & Mrs. MyLastName-HisLastName. To be honest, we both wanted to keep our current feeling of identity in the work place but socially it really didn't matter. I'm not going to be upset if I get called Mrs. HisLastName on a Christmas card, etc.

What are you Ladies doing? What's your reasoning?  I think I've listed all the most common ways to address the "last name" issue...I'd love to hear what everyone is up to!  :)

--Everyone play nicely as this can sometimes become a heated subject-- lol
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Re: Last Name Change

  • I think I'll move my current last name to my middle name and take his last name as my new last name. My maiden name is a girl's first name so it would work.
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  • I'm going with the traditional, im marrying him i feel its only right to take his last name. When we have children our first born will have my last name as middle name. Example: If girl it will Antiona SaccoLeone if boy it will Sonny Sacco Leone.

  • I'm hyphenating to become Mrs. MyLastName-HisLastName. It was a big fight b/c I didn't want to change my name legally but still wanted to use his socially. He said I could only use his if I took his name legally, so there you have it. I plan to still use only MyLastName professionally, at least until my next certification. Apparently, a lot of ppl in my field have done this without any problems. Our children will be Baby MyLastName-HisLastName.
  • I very much wanted to keep my last name in some way. However, it will not work as a middle name and I can't easily hyphenate because FI's last name is 13 letters, 4 syllables, and very German. So by default, I'm taking his last name.
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  • I'm taking his last name. Both of our last names are long and uncommon so hyphenating would be rather difficult, especially once we have children. My last name doesn't work as a middle name so I'm just dropping it.

    It felt really bittersweet until I read the article below and loved how one woman put how she felt about changing her last name: "We operate as a team and now we have a team name"  Probably kind of silly but it worked for me!  

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/08/15/women-changing-name-after-marriage_n_927707.html?1313496839&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl7%7Csec1_lnk1%7C87591
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  • S0095042S0095042 member
    First Comment
    edited February 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f72d197a-020c-42e2-a130-1d0abe0df248Post:5e8b65f1-5fe8-4d03-b76a-380e3438ba72">Re: Last Name Change</a>:
    [QUOTE] " We operate as a team and now we have a team name "  Posted by bpphoto785[/QUOTE]

    That was our sentament as well...but "team" for us ment not leaning towards one side or another -- however, I can def. see both sides. :) (I think it really just comes down to the couple)
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  • I'm taking FI's last name :)
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  • I am taking his last name. I am not exactly tied to my last name and it wouldn't work to use it as a middle name. A friend told me that if I kept it, I would sound very international since my last name is French and his is Portugese. But, I am excited and honored to take his name :)
  • I'm also taking FI's last name.

    I'm more traditional/old school (even though I'm fairly young) and I just always knew that I'd take my husbands last name.

    Personally, I think hyphenating can get more complicated later on in life and I really don't want to have to write out both names (call me lazy!)

    I have an older brother so the thought of my last name "going away" after I change my name isn't an issue either.
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  • Im going the traditional route and taking his last name.
    I love his last name with my first name, and can't wait to be a Sheeler :)
    I will be a tiny bit sad that no one will aoutomatically know I'm Irish, though... my last name starts with Mc.
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  • I'm going the traditional route. Dropping my last name & taking his. I can't wait to have his last name & it be ours =)
  • I'm keeping my name (and of course so is he). We've both published papers in our respective fields (he's a physicist and I'm a science journalist). Plus, I'm very partial to my last name ... it has some awesome history. If someone calls me Mrs. hislastname, I'll respond. But I just prefer my own last name. :)
  • I'm going the traditional route and dropping my name and taking his :)
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  • I picked traditional with a twist, but I'm also keeping my middle name and my last name. And taking FI last name. So I'll have my name: First Middle Madien Last and then Married Last name...
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  • i'm dropping my last name and taking his

    I CAN'T WAIT to be a Hatfield!!  :-D
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f72d197a-020c-42e2-a130-1d0abe0df248Post:818af841-80bb-4fc8-aca0-8d60c90cdf99">Re: Last Name Change</a>:
    [QUOTE]I picked traditional with a twist, but I'm also keeping my middle name and my last name. And taking FI last name. So I'll have my name: First Middle Madien Last and then Married Last name...
    Posted by lnvane00[/QUOTE]

    This is exactly what I want to do!  I didn't want to hyphenate, but I didn't want to have to ditch my middle name now because I really like it.  I'll basically just have 2 middle names, but just for my own sake.  I'll go by Mrs. HisLastName.  My last name is Italian and FI's is Polish, and while they sound okay hyphenated (they are both short, my last name is 6 letters and his is 5), the whole hyphenated thing is not my style.  Our kids will obviously have just his last name. :)
  • I'm really not attached to my last name. It's no common and kind of weird and as a child my last name was used to pick on me with. My dad and I have been off and on in our relationship and I really have no attachment to it. With that said I love FI's last name and I am traditional when it comes to taking his name.
  • I'm taking his last name. Still debating on whether I want to make my maiden name my middle name b/c I LOVE my middle name. For my job/email signature/media/etc, however, I will hyphenate my maiden-FI last name so that people know who I am.

    I'm curious. If you're both hyphenating your last name, what do you think your kids will do later when they get married if they choose to keep their maiden name? It seems like that could get complicated... and long. I think there are some cultures that already do this, right? I forgot exactly how though.
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  • S0095042S0095042 member
    First Comment
    edited February 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f72d197a-020c-42e2-a130-1d0abe0df248Post:1532ac37-e303-46a5-ae77-c9305075ac8c">Re: Last Name Change</a>:
    [QUOTE]. If you're both hyphenating your last name, what do you think your kids will do later when they get married if they choose to keep their maiden name? It seems like that could get complicated... Posted by mandydc0509[/QUOTE]

    I'm not sure we're even having kids...but if we do, then they will have to choose what they want to do concerning their married name. :) My guess is they would use their dad's name as their "maiden" if they decide to hyphen...I would not expect them to combine 3 names...that would be awful! lol.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f72d197a-020c-42e2-a130-1d0abe0df248Post:5aa472c5-1532-4ee2-8274-0a3a00244cce">Re: Last Name Change</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Last Name Change : I'm not sure we're even having kids...but if we do, then they will have to choose what they want to do concerning their married name. :) My guess is they would use their dad's name as their "maiden" if they decide to hyphen...I would not expect them to combine 3 names...that would be awful! lol.
    Posted by S0095042[/QUOTE]

    Haha! Ok, that makes sense.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f72d197a-020c-42e2-a130-1d0abe0df248Post:818af841-80bb-4fc8-aca0-8d60c90cdf99">Re: Last Name Change</a>:
    [QUOTE]I picked traditional with a twist, but I'm also keeping my middle name and my last name. And taking FI last name. So I'll have my name: First Middle Madien Last and then Married Last name...
    Posted by lnvane00[/QUOTE]

    <div>This, too! It's long and I'm not sure when I'll ever be called by full new four-name name, but it's mostly for sentiment that I'm keeping it. :) My family is very low on boys, so there's not much to hold our last name! I'm just going to tack it on for pride, but for simplicity and future's sake, just go my Mrs. Hislastname. </div>

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  • I am taking his last name. I love the idea of being a family unit all with the same last name. Can't wait to be a Witzel!
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  • I'm sad to lose my name especially because it's the end of our name becuase I have two sisters and no brothers and my dad only had a sister. However, I do feel it's important to have a "team name" as one of you ladies put it for our kids and it's important to my FI. However, I don't want to change it at work so I'm swapping out my middle name and I plan on continuing with my just my maiden name at work. 
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  • Originally FI and I decided we were both going to keep our last names then our children would have our last names hyphenated. But then we decided to both hyphenate our names. He is getting a little bit of sh!t from his friends, my dad and brother but FI really wants to do it :)
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  • I am taking his last name.  It is definitely bittersweet.  My poor dad only had girls so no passing along.  My dad is totally ok with it, so as long as I have his blessing, I'm changing my name! 

    I work in the financial industry and we handle a lot of estates and trusts and things.  One thing I would strongly recommend, whatever route you take...stick to it.  We have several "female" clients that through the years changed how and when to use what name and it can get really tricky when dealing with IRS and financials.  There are a lot more hoops and ladders to get through.  Just my word of advice!

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  • I'm taking his for two reasons:

    1. I HATE my last name.  It's a super common last name and I have a super common first name.  Literally THOUSANDS of people have the same name as I do.

    2. I really didn't want to hyphenate because I thought it sounded awkward.  Also, once we have kids I feel like the hypenated last names could turn into a big jumbled mess.  And what if when they get married THEY want to hypenate?  You can't have three hypenated last names, can you?
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  • I struggled with this for awhile but have came to the conclusion to go olde school and traditional. He had an awesome last name so it helps. My maiden name can be a girls first so it's I the running for a future daughters name!
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  • I'm going for it and changing my last name =]  I never thought I would, but now I'm pretty excited about it.  I thought about hypenating, but I've just read a lot about how much of a PITA it is (apparently a lot of technical programs don't recognize hyphen in their system) and I don't want a super long last name.
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  • Tradition with a twist. I'm the only person in the US with my name...literally. There are only 114 people in the US with my last name, and they're all my family. I'm a little attached to it. I'm moving it to a middle name. My first name is Heather and his last name begins with R....to me, dropping my name completely makes it sound like a growl between my first name and his last name....


    Just how I roll.


    I also do not want to be referred to as Mrs. Johnny Smith....My name is not Johnny...that's just my personal preference ha ha
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  • I'm excited to take FI's name. The "Team" reference is exactly how I see it. But to each their own. As we can see, everyone has their own reasons for what works best for them.
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