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Guestlist stress :(

SRivera09SRivera09 member
100 Comments
in Florida-Central Florida
So my guestlist has gotten completely out of control.  It's gotten so inflated by courtesy invites, and then if you invite this person, you have to invite that one.  ugh!  Out venue can only hold 110 ppl, our list is about 120 ppl.  I know some ppl won't come and we'll be at or below the 110 max, but I never even wanted a guest list that high!!  All these ppl just assume they are coming and then assume they can bring a guest!  I'm seriously regreting having a big wedding. 
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Re: Guestlist stress :(

  • Pretty ParulaPretty Parula
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Sorry, doll! It's not fun, but it may be time to start calling people up and having one-on-one conversations about how you really would love to have them there, but it's just a small venue and you're really limited. Just because someone assumes they're invited doesn't mean you have to actually invite them. I had some friends who probably figured they would be invited (because they invited me to their weddings) but very early on I started telling people that we were limited by the size of our venue and that wouldn't be able to have everyone there who's been a part of our lives, and they've all said that they understood that. I think as long as they get that it's not because they aren't wanted, most folks are cool with it. I hope, anyway! GL!!
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  • mlharbismlharbis
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm sorry.  That's rough.  I agree with PP, just because someone thinks they are invited doesn't mean you have t invite them.  Also, you could start saying that your space is really limited by your venue and that you are on a really tight budget.  People get it once you say money is a factor, they just don't think at first how expensive a wedding is.  Good luck!
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  • umcollegegrlumcollegegrl
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Its uncomfortable, but sometimes you just have to explain to people that you wish you could invite everyone, but your venue and budget just won't allow it.  As for people assuming they could bring a guest we told people early on that we would love to have them there but couldn't afforded to have everyone bring a guest and that we hoped they would understand.  We also told a lot of people that automatically assumed they would be invited that since we both have large families, we were really only able to invite family (which was pretty much true).  This excuse worked really well for those people you barely talk to who somehow assume they're going to be invited (random facebook friend from high school that you haven't seen since you graduated? - yeah i had a few of those people think they were going to be invited.  so weird)

    Good luck!
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  • frozenxthoughtsfrozenxthoughts member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree with collegegrl. I was having the same problem, but I've already notified most of the people I will be inviting to let them know I can only invite those listed on the invite due to budget reasons. Most people will understand if you explain it one on one. I'm probably going to reiterate this when I send invited out so I can be sure to keep the guest list where it needs to be. Hope it all gets worked out!
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  • SRivera09SRivera09 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    thanks girls, I talked with my sis and figured out a way to fix a couple of the problems I was having.  Hopefully it will work itself out!
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  • AileeneGAileeneG member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I hope it all works out for you! My list is getting close to 300, and it just keeps growing. I wouldn't feel badly about it, though. If I had invited every person who started being friendly again, or even those offering to help me with wedding projects, the list would be so ridiculously long. It's just not realistic, and I think people will understand.
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  • meghanmcadamsmeghanmcadams
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I feel your pain we are in the beginning stages of the same problem! My Moms list alone is 100 and I keep trying to explain that we don't have to invite people to be nice we will send a announcement after. Half the people wont come from Philadelphia anyways. Good luck though girl I am sure it will workout!
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